need help/ideas

well I'm still here and I can't really complain as I'm only 37+6, which
means I'm more pregnant than I've ever been before. The problem is that due
to the amount of pain I am in I am really beginning to lose it, normally I'm
the one telling people to relax, enjoy the time before the baby, book a
massage, have a haircut etc. all of which I would love to do, but I'm fairly
much confined to bed, I can do almost nothing for myself, even getting
myself a glass of water is painful. Thankfully my parents are here, so no
worries regarding caring for Nathanael, but even so things are still very
difficult, my poor husband is exhausted as I've had to wake him for
assistance in the night. Basically I do not know what to do, I do not know
how to stop myself from becoming a complete wreck. I'm fairly sure that any
doctor would be happy to induce me now, but I am totally against that, the
majority of the pain is in my upper body, so even having an epidural would
not give me pain relief from this pain, and having an epidural given the
severity of my SPD would be a very bad thing. So my conclusion is I do just
have to wait this out, which could still be 4 more weeks and I honestly
cannot do that and I don't know what to do.

Anne

"Anne Rogers" wrote in message

well I'm still here and I can't really complain as I'm only 37+6, which
means I'm more pregnant than I've ever been before. The problem is that
due to the amount of pain I am in I am really beginning to lose it,
normally I'm the one telling people to relax, enjoy the time before the
baby, book a massage, have a haircut etc. all of which I would love to do,
but I'm fairly much confined to bed, I can do almost nothing for myself,
even getting myself a glass of water is painful. Thankfully my parents are
here, so no worries regarding caring for Nathanael, but even so things are
still very difficult, my poor husband is exhausted as I've had to wake him
for assistance in the night. Basically I do not know what to do, I do not
know how to stop myself from becoming a complete wreck. I'm fairly sure
that any doctor would be happy to induce me now, but I am totally against
that, the majority of the pain is in my upper body, so even having an
epidural would not give me pain relief from this pain, and having an
epidural given the severity of my SPD would be a very bad thing. So my
conclusion is I do just have to wait this out, which could still be 4 more
weeks and I honestly cannot do that and I don't know what to do.

Anne

I have no suggestions Anne, but I can sympathize. With my broken ribs my
husband is doing everything for me, I can't drive or hold my children. I
can't ride my horses now till after my daughter is born. I spent all day
crying yesterday because I was feeling so sorry for myself. A few weeks ago
I was a very active person. Now I am confined to the sofa. I have had people
telling me I could be like this for 6 months - I hope not!

Try to focus on all the good things, I know that's hhard when you feel
useless and in pain.

((Hugs))

Andrea mom of 5 and edd 15th October.

I have never suggested this to anyone - you know I'm a homebirthy type -
but do you think this might be a case where an elective caesarean section
might be in order?

I think in your position I'd be considering it. One of the factors would be
whether I wanted more children, given that many of the risks of c/s are
actually for subsequent pregnancies.

I'm assuming that there's a reasonable chance that your pain will resolve
once you're no longer pregnant, either spontaneously or because you'll have
a better choice of drugs. Again, the likelihood of that is a factor to
consider.

Sidheag
DS Colin Oct 27 2003

Anne, so sorry to hear you're in so much pain. I don't
have any good advice, having not BTDT. I imagine what
I would try to do to cope would be to do as much escapist
reading as possible. Do you like science fiction?
Mystery novels? Romance novels? Maybe some movies? Rent
whole seasons at a time of some show that you like?

The other thing is to take a page out of the labor
coping book. Just like it gets much easier if you only
worry about the contraction you're currently experiencing,
it might be easier if you only focus on today. Four
more weeks sounds unbearable, but you don't know that
you'll go to four weeks, so don't borrow trouble, you know?

Anyway, I have no idea if that will help, but just my
2c.

Emily
--
DS 5/02
EDD 9/5/05

I'm sure your husband doesn't mind waking up in the middle of the night
to take of your needs as long as they are genuine. You might want to
look into having water by your side and wearing adult diapers so that
your husband isn't troubled by your inability to gestate.

Regards...

Anne Rogers wrote:
well I'm still here and I can't really complain as I'm only 37+6, which
means I'm more pregnant than I've ever been before. The problem is that due
to the amount of pain I am in I am really beginning to lose it, normally I'm
the one telling people to relax, enjoy the time before the baby, book a
massage, have a haircut etc. all of which I would love to do, but I'm fairly
much confined to bed, I can do almost nothing for myself, even getting
myself a glass of water is painful. Thankfully my parents are here, so no
worries regarding caring for Nathanael, but even so things are still very
difficult, my poor husband is exhausted as I've had to wake him for
assistance in the night. Basically I do not know what to do, I do not know
how to stop myself from becoming a complete wreck. I'm fairly sure that any
doctor would be happy to induce me now, but I am totally against that, the
majority of the pain is in my upper body, so even having an epidural would
not give me pain relief from this pain, and having an epidural given the
severity of my SPD would be a very bad thing. So my conclusion is I do just
have to wait this out, which could still be 4 more weeks and I honestly
cannot do that and I don't know what to do.

Anne

I have no suggestions Anne, but I can sympathize. With my broken ribs my
husband is doing everything for me, I can't drive or hold my children. I
can't ride my horses now till after my daughter is born. I spent all day
crying yesterday because I was feeling so sorry for myself. A few weeks
ago I was a very active person. Now I am confined to the sofa. I have had
people telling me I could be like this for 6 months - I hope not!

oh Andrea, I feel bad having moaned now, I really hope you heal at a normal
pace and not take 6 months

Anne

I have never suggested this to anyone - you know I'm a homebirthy type -
but do you think this might be a case where an elective caesarean section
might be in order?

I'm beginning to think that, but then I realised that I won't be able to
talk to anyone about that til Thursday and even if they did agree it would
be scheduled for the following week, which is still a long long way away.

I think in your position I'd be considering it. One of the factors would
be
whether I wanted more children, given that many of the risks of c/s are
actually for subsequent pregnancies.

We're not sure if we want more children, we think we probably do, which is
one of the reasons I haven't begged anyone yet. Though honestly if I could
organise one for tomorrow I think I would do it, I just can't do that and by
the time I could there is a reasonable chance I'll have managed to have the
baby anyway.

I'm assuming that there's a reasonable chance that your pain will resolve
once you're no longer pregnant, either spontaneously or because you'll
have
a better choice of drugs. Again, the likelihood of that is a factor to
consider.

who can say? either it will resolve, or there will be more tests to go
though, as this seems to be an uncommon complication no one can say for sure
what will happen afterwards.

Cheers

Anne

Anne, so sorry to hear you're in so much pain. I don't
have any good advice, having not BTDT. I imagine what
I would try to do to cope would be to do as much escapist
reading as possible. Do you like science fiction?
Mystery novels? Romance novels? Maybe some movies? Rent
whole seasons at a time of some show that you like?

I'm reading a bit, the only problem is I can only hold quite a small book,
and even then for only a short time. I'm mostly listening to the radio and
occasionally doing a bit of sewing, I can manage a few stitches and my cross
stitch is slowly getting done.

The other thing is to take a page out of the labor
coping book. Just like it gets much easier if you only
worry about the contraction you're currently experiencing,
it might be easier if you only focus on today. Four
more weeks sounds unbearable, but you don't know that
you'll go to four weeks, so don't borrow trouble, you know?

Everyone tells me take one day at a time, I really am trying, the worst
times for me are around midnight (which day are you dealing with then?) and
late morning. Last night, I lay in bed for over an hour praying that the
painkillers I had taken would work, they didn't seem to be kicking in so I
ended up in the bath at midnight, I did sleep then, but I woke up every
single hour, and was awake for good by 5.30am.

I know saying 4 more weeks seems cynical and borrowing trouble, but in my
last pregnancy I had this really strong feeling baby was coming on 28th May,
I told everyone, most people laughed, but DS made his appearance at 10.16pm
on 28th May, this pregnancy I've had the same feeling about 25th June, after
last time, I dare not ignore my gut instict!

Cheers
Anne

I'm so sorry, Anne. You are in my prayers.

Leslie

Anne Rogers wrote:
I'm reading a bit, the only problem is I can only hold quite a small book,
and even then for only a short time. I'm mostly listening to the radio and
occasionally doing a bit of sewing, I can manage a few stitches and my cross
stitch is slowly getting done.

Wow -- hard not to be able to hold books. They make gadgets
that can do it for you (like the things for holding open cook
books in the kitchen). Maybe someone could get you one of those?
Also, audio books... a bunch are available online, now, I think,
through audible.com or similar.

I know saying 4 more weeks seems cynical and borrowing trouble, but in my
last pregnancy I had this really strong feeling baby was coming on 28th May,
I told everyone, most people laughed, but DS made his appearance at 10.16pm
on 28th May, this pregnancy I've had the same feeling about 25th June, after
last time, I dare not ignore my gut instict!

Well, to take an optimists view on that, either your gut instinct
is wrong and you don't have to wait so long (wouldn't 6/25 be
more than 42 weeks anyway?) or you will have *serious* bragging
rights about knowing the birth dates of both children ahead of time.
Or, even better, the baby will come tomorrow nad 6/25 will be
the date of his/her first smile

Emily