Benefits of daycare for 20-month old?

We have a 20-month old, who has been at home until now. I think she
might benefit from going to daycare for 3 days a week, but at the same
time, I have mixed feelings about it.

My child is very shy and cried for 2 weeks when we changed sitters a
month ago. I am worried about upsetting the balance now. Something
else: a financial issue is that the centers here don't have part-time
programs for children under 3, so we'll need to pay the full-time price
for daycare + the nanny for the rest of the week.

Are there really any benefits to the child if she goes to daycare
before the age of 3? She sees other kids on the playground almost every
day, and she goes to a music class once a week.

Gia

On 12 Jun 2006 11:58:11 -0700, "Gia" wrote:

We have a 20-month old, who has been at home until now. I think she
might benefit from going to daycare for 3 days a week, but at the same
time, I have mixed feelings about it.

My child is very shy and cried for 2 weeks when we changed sitters a
month ago. I am worried about upsetting the balance now. Something
else: a financial issue is that the centers here don't have part-time
programs for children under 3, so we'll need to pay the full-time price
for daycare + the nanny for the rest of the week.

Are there really any benefits to the child if she goes to daycare
before the age of 3? She sees other kids on the playground almost every
day, and she goes to a music class once a week.

It's not unusual for a child under 2 to be shy.

If I were in your position, I wouldn't send her to daycare, mainly due
to the expense. Sure, social exposure to other children is a benefit,
but it sounds like she's getting that at the park and at music class.

You could always see if your nanny can get her involved in a playgroup
if you're wanting more one on one play time with children.

IME, daycares have a great purpose if you need them. When we needed
to send our 2 yo to a daycare temporarily while I recovered from
surgery, she brought home every bug going around, and then some. It's
just not worth it, if you don't need to take her, imo.

Nan

Gia wrote:
We have a 20-month old, who has been at home until now. I think she
might benefit from going to daycare for 3 days a week, but at the same
time, I have mixed feelings about it.

My child is very shy and cried for 2 weeks when we changed sitters a
month ago. I am worried about upsetting the balance now. Something
else: a financial issue is that the centers here don't have part-time
programs for children under 3, so we'll need to pay the full-time price
for daycare + the nanny for the rest of the week.

Are there really any benefits to the child if she goes to daycare
before the age of 3? She sees other kids on the playground almost every
day, and she goes to a music class once a week.

Gia

My advice, don't.
I moved my 1st to a day care in similar circumstances and I didn't see
any big benefit from it. The move was a struggle. She wouldn't eat at
the day care for a long time and it was hard on everybody. Money wasn't
a factor because it was costing me the same. She took 2 months to
adjust and we continued her at the daycare because it wasn't a bad
place or anything. Just that I didn't see any big benefit. We all went
through agony because of this shift which was unnecessary.

My 2nd is now at the same age my 1st was when me moved her. We are NOT
moving my 2nd to a day care anytime soon. She's happy and healthy where
she is. We will re-visit this issue when she turns 3.

One other thing that irks me about daycare centers is their rules and
stuff. I can go on and on about this topic. My home care provider is
much more flexible and one-on-one than the daycare. She also costs much
more than the other daycare providers around the area but I'm not
changing her. My 2nd loves her.

Hope that helps.

Gia wrote:
We have a 20-month old, who has been at home until now. I think she
might benefit from going to daycare for 3 days a week, but at the same
time, I have mixed feelings about it.

My child is very shy and cried for 2 weeks when we changed sitters a
month ago. I am worried about upsetting the balance now. Something
else: a financial issue is that the centers here don't have part-time
programs for children under 3, so we'll need to pay the full-time price
for daycare + the nanny for the rest of the week.

Are there really any benefits to the child if she goes to daycare
before the age of 3? She sees other kids on the playground almost every
day, and she goes to a music class once a week.

No way in heck I'd pay for full time daycare if I
didn't need it! It sounds like your daughter has plenty
of interaction with other kids, and it's not that long
before she can do a part time program. What has made
you think that daycare would be so beneficial at this
stage that it would be worth not only paying for the
time you'd use, but also extra time you wouldn't be using
(and on top of a nanny!)?

Best wishes,
Ericka

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...
Gia wrote:
We have a 20-month old, who has been at home until now. I think she
might benefit from going to daycare for 3 days a week, but at the same
time, I have mixed feelings about it.

My child is very shy and cried for 2 weeks when we changed sitters a
month ago. I am worried about upsetting the balance now. Something
else: a financial issue is that the centers here don't have part-time
programs for children under 3, so we'll need to pay the full-time price
for daycare + the nanny for the rest of the week.

Are there really any benefits to the child if she goes to daycare
before the age of 3? She sees other kids on the playground almost every
day, and she goes to a music class once a week.

No way in heck I'd pay for full time daycare if I
didn't need it! It sounds like your daughter has plenty
of interaction with other kids, and it's not that long
before she can do a part time program. What has made
you think that daycare would be so beneficial at this
stage that it would be worth not only paying for the
time you'd use, but also extra time you wouldn't be using
(and on top of a nanny!)?

Are there parent's day (or mother's day) out programs where you are? These
are one or two day a week childcare/preschool programs for infants or
toddlers which have some of the benefits of daycare as far as being a group
setting, but you only pay for the days you need, usually only one or two
part-days a week. They tend to be affiliated with private schools which have
preschool divisions, and I suspect it's largely a recruiting tool and a
service to keep parents happy as opposed to a big revenue producer. My
daughter's is pretty exploratory-at the young toddler level, they usually
have about 6 children to two adults, and there will be part of the time of
day in the room playing with toys and doing simple crafts/coloring/etc,
listening to music and dancing around, and listening to stories for those
who will stay still that long. They also have a toddler-specific outdoor
play area and a gymboree-type indoor play room for gross motor, take walks
around the campus, etc. Since Alli has a motor skills delay, this provides
her another avenue for gross motor exploration, and it's worked well for us
for the most part. She does seem to recognize the children from week to
week.

As someone who teaches toddler music classes, unless yours is structured
very differently than the ones I teach, I wouldn't count on them for
providing a lot of child-child interaction. They're designed to improve
parent-child or caregiver-child interaction, so while children can observe
others and see that there's other little people in this world, they aren't
getting time to really play with other children that they'd get at the park,
a playgroup, or a free play time at a baby gym. Just as school isn't the
best place for school aged children to learn socialization, any sort of
formal "class" is unlikely to be the ideal setting for socialization for
younger children.

Hi --

It doesn't sound as though daycare is the right fit just now. But
perhaps next year, when she's closer to 3 years old, an old-fashioned
nursery school (a few hours a day, several days a week) might be a good
choice. Are there any nursery schools in your area?

Our kids started nursery school (2 mornings/week) at 24 months and both
LOVED it. But then, my kids saw the school and pushed me out the
classroom door saying "bye bye. you go now, mama." Other kids in the
class had more trouble separating from their parents, and one family
pulled out for a semester, then had a more successful introduction to
school when their son was close to 34 months.

Kids love to watch other kids, but don't really start to play
interactively until somewhere around age 3 1/2 years. At that point, I
think a nursery school program can be quite valuable. Before then, the
advantage of nursery school is that your child can be exposed to
routines, projects and materials that either you don't think to use at
home, or are impractical in a home setting.

Just my two cents,
--Beth Kevles

http://web.mit.edu/kevles/www/nomilk.html -- a page for the milk-allergic
Disclaimer: Nothing in this message should be construed as medical
advice. Please consult with your own medical practicioner.

NOTE: No email is read at my MIT address. Use the AOL one if you would
like me to reply.

Gia wrote:
We have a 20-month old, who has been at home until now. I think she
might benefit from going to daycare for 3 days a week, but at the same
time, I have mixed feelings about it.

My child is very shy and cried for 2 weeks when we changed sitters a
month ago. I am worried about upsetting the balance now. Something
else: a financial issue is that the centers here don't have part-time
programs for children under 3, so we'll need to pay the full-time price
for daycare + the nanny for the rest of the week.

Are there really any benefits to the child if she goes to daycare
before the age of 3? She sees other kids on the playground almost every
day, and she goes to a music class once a week.

Gia


I can't see any benefit if she already sees other kids on the playground
and she goes to music class but YMMV. Does your daughter know/like any
of the other children at the playground? Maybe the nanny or you can
start to set up scheduled playdates with one of the other children.

Jeanne

"Beth Kevles" wrote in message
...
Kids love to watch other kids, but don't really start to play
interactively until somewhere around age 3 1/2 years. At that point, I
think a nursery school program can be quite valuable. Before then, the
advantage of nursery school is that your child can be exposed to
routines, projects and materials that either you don't think to use at
home, or are impractical in a home setting.

Are you sure it's 3 1/2? DS was interacting earlier than that and DD is 2,
not yet 2 1/2, and she interacts like there's no tomorrow.

I appreciate all the replies! Yes, viruses are something I worry about.
On the other hand, our child is very active, and I am worried that she
is bored at home.

There are huge waiting lists for the daycare centers where we live (1-2
years!), so it would be difficult to just decide to enroll her in one
when we are ready. We either enroll her now, or wait at least another
year. I have a couple of weeks to think before I make up my mind.
Gia


Jeanne wrote:
Gia wrote:
We have a 20-month old, who has been at home until now. I think she
might benefit from going to daycare for 3 days a week, but at the same
time, I have mixed feelings about it.

My child is very shy and cried for 2 weeks when we changed sitters a
month ago. I am worried about upsetting the balance now. Something
else: a financial issue is that the centers here don't have part-time
programs for children under 3, so we'll need to pay the full-time price
for daycare + the nanny for the rest of the week.

Are there really any benefits to the child if she goes to daycare
before the age of 3? She sees other kids on the playground almost every
day, and she goes to a music class once a week.

Gia


I can't see any benefit if she already sees other kids on the playground
and she goes to music class but YMMV. Does your daughter know/like any
of the other children at the playground? Maybe the nanny or you can
start to set up scheduled playdates with one of the other children.

Jeanne

In article , toypup says...


"Beth Kevles" wrote in message
...
Kids love to watch other kids, but don't really start to play
interactively until somewhere around age 3 1/2 years. At that point, I
think a nursery school program can be quite valuable. Before then, the
advantage of nursery school is that your child can be exposed to
routines, projects and materials that either you don't think to use at
home, or are impractical in a home setting.

Are you sure it's 3 1/2? DS was interacting earlier than that and DD is 2,
not yet 2 1/2, and she interacts like there's no tomorrow.



I remember clearly when my son went to a new day care when he was 18 months old.
He and this little girl took a shine to each other and spent all day together,
although they had to be separated at lunch else nothing got eaten. We dubbed
them "Pebbles and Bam Bam".

I've seen older ages given as being "interactive" depending on criteria like
play no longer being parallel. But I wonder about the age given because 3 1/2
gets pretty stubborn and nothing much is in parallel *or* in series

IME around five is when they get out into the world outside the home and other
venues associated with the parent.

So I'm with you - these ages depend on the definition of "interactive" and don't
take into account when a child actually enjoys and gets something out of other
kids, and IME that starts pretty soon in infancy. My son as a tiny infant paid
special attention to childrens' faces, and in his first day care I'd drop him
off in the morning, put him on the floor, and he'd crawl right over to where the
action is.

Banty


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