If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. |
|
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
#1
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 + years. It hasn't been
so great, and she recently got pregnant. We had plans to get married (for the child), but I have recently decided after disucssion that it is a better idea not to get married. We have a good relationship right now, but fear it will get worse after the child is born. We have had some conversations about the child that scares me. She seems to think that if the parents aren't married, then he has no rights - and seems like she wouldn't be willing to give me any. From what I can gather on the net, this is not true. I have all the rights of a married parent in a divorce child custody case. I want to be a part of my childs life, but I fear that my role will be limited to 4 days a month, and a huge child support payment. 1) What are the chances that the father, who has a good job right out of college (Approx 40K per year with great bennifits), a house and a good amount of savings can get some type of joint custody over the child who's mother is jobless (mainly because she wants to be a stay at home mom) and lives with her parents? 2) Will it take time and money on lawyers in order to get joint custody as a single dad? Does it seem worth a try in my case, or am I pretty much going to be limited to the "every other weekend" role? 3) I read that child support in Tennessee is 21% of net income, but this did not specify any joint custody agreements or pre-marital status. If we were never married, does the 21% still apply to me? If joint custody is given will this lower this amount? 4) If we try to work out our issues, and stay together for a year after the baby is born, or are under a personal financial agreement for a year, can she file for child support after that year and get back child support? 5) What if I'm making 40K per year now, and I lose my job after 2 years and cannot find another job that pays that amount. Will the judge adjust my childsupport payment to reflect this, or will he look at my past income and education (college degree) and decide that I should be making the 40K and continue paying the original payment? I guess my main object is that of any single dads - get to see my kid as much as possible. I know some dads that never get to see their kids becuase the baby's mother makes it so hard for them. These same women go ballistic if they receive their child supoprt a day late. |
#2
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
|
#3
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
wrote in message oups.com... My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 + years. It hasn't been so great, and she recently got pregnant. We had plans to get married (for the child), but I have recently decided after disucssion that it is a better idea not to get married. We have a good relationship right now, but fear it will get worse after the child is born. I would never suggest marrying someone if you are not ready to be married. But the two of you have been together for 2 years now. You were considering marriage. You say that after discussion, *you* have made the decision not to marry--discussion with her? Or with someone else? All relationshipe have ups and downs, especially in times of stress--and an unexpected pregnancy is certainly a stress factor. Perhaps if the 2 of you got some counseling, you would see things more clearly. Again, I am not saying that you should get married, but talking to a counselor who is objective and can clearly hear what each of you is saying may give you some clarity that you do not have right now. And even if it doesn't change the fact that you do not want to marry, it may help her understand the importance of a father in a child's life. Don't take it to a fight about visitation/child support until you have done everything in your power to work things out amicably. You don't want your child to be standing between warring parents. Counseling may be a way to prevent that--and it may give you some insights into both yourself and your girlfriend that you do not have right now. |
#4
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
First let me say one thing. WHY the hell did you let her get pregnant? Are you crazy? Thats 18 to 23 years of servatude dude, I hope that 10 minutes of sex was worth the cost. Sounds like she found a great guy to saddle with the expense. You have no where to go but up, and her support has no where to go but up too. Have you considered getting her drunk and hopping in a real hot hot-tub? she might miscarry which is the next best thing to abortion. Otherwise, you should have thought about it first. You are screwed. Hope I haven't hurt anyone's feelings, but hey, somebody needs to tell him this so he doesn't do it again. Fight for full custody, joint means squat mostly. Good luck |
#5
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
wrote in message oups.com... My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 + years. It hasn't been so great, and she recently got pregnant. We had plans to get married (for the child), but I have recently decided after disucssion that it is a better idea not to get married. We have a good relationship right now, but fear it will get worse after the child is born. We have had some conversations about the child that scares me. She seems to think that if the parents aren't married, then he has no rights - and seems like she wouldn't be willing to give me any. From what I can gather on the net, this is not true. I have all the rights of a married parent in a divorce child custody case. I want to be a part of my childs life, but I fear that my role will be limited to 4 days a month, and a huge child support payment. 1) What are the chances that the father, who has a good job right out of college (Approx 40K per year with great bennifits), a house and a good amount of savings can get some type of joint custody over the child who's mother is jobless (mainly because she wants to be a stay at home mom) and lives with her parents? Slim to none. 2) Will it take time and money on lawyers in order to get joint custody as a single dad? Does it seem worth a try in my case, or am I pretty much going to be limited to the "every other weekend" role? The latter; at best. 3) I read that child support in Tennessee is 21% of net income, but this did not specify any joint custody agreements or pre-marital status. If we were never married, does the 21% still apply to me? If joint custody is given will this lower this amount? 4) If we try to work out our issues, and stay together for a year after the baby is born, or are under a personal financial agreement for a year, can she file for child support after that year and get back child support? 5) What if I'm making 40K per year now, and I lose my job after 2 years and cannot find another job that pays that amount. Will the judge adjust my childsupport payment to reflect this, or will he look at my past income and education (college degree) and decide that I should be making the 40K and continue paying the original payment? The latter. Plus, the judge will likely INCREASE the amount. I guess my main object is that of any single dads - get to see my kid as much as possible. I know some dads that never get to see their kids becuase the baby's mother makes it so hard for them. These same women go ballistic if they receive their child supoprt a day late. |
#7
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
|
#8
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
wrote in She cannot get back child support in all probability. Child support is typically payable beginning on the day that the support order was filed. If a support order is not filed, no liability for back support. In Michigan, they can and do collect CS from the day the child is born regardless of the day a petition is filed. I was hit with a $42,000 arrearage when I was finally notified some 8 years later. |
#9
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
What on earth are you talking about? He is asking about *joint* custody so
he can be part of his child's life. He didn't say anything about her being an unfit mother. wrote in message ups.com... You had a good relationship and wanted to marry this woman. Now, you've decided to not to marry her and you're already planning a court battle to declare her an unfit mother and take the baby away. You sound like a real sweetheart. I hate to tell you but a judge won't give a rat's ass about your 40K/yr job. Especially, if she has the support, financial and emotional, of her parents. Normally, I advocate fairness with regard to CS payments. However, for you, I really hope you get nailed for the full amount. wrote: My girlfriend and I have been together for 2 + years. It hasn't been so great, and she recently got pregnant. We had plans to get married (for the child), but I have recently decided after disucssion that it is a better idea not to get married. We have a good relationship right now, but fear it will get worse after the child is born. We have had some conversations about the child that scares me. She seems to think that if the parents aren't married, then he has no rights - and seems like she wouldn't be willing to give me any. From what I can gather on the net, this is not true. I have all the rights of a married parent in a divorce child custody case. I want to be a part of my childs life, but I fear that my role will be limited to 4 days a month, and a huge child support payment. 1) What are the chances that the father, who has a good job right out of college (Approx 40K per year with great bennifits), a house and a good amount of savings can get some type of joint custody over the child who's mother is jobless (mainly because she wants to be a stay at home mom) and lives with her parents? 2) Will it take time and money on lawyers in order to get joint custody as a single dad? Does it seem worth a try in my case, or am I pretty much going to be limited to the "every other weekend" role? 3) I read that child support in Tennessee is 21% of net income, but this did not specify any joint custody agreements or pre-marital status. If we were never married, does the 21% still apply to me? If joint custody is given will this lower this amount? 4) If we try to work out our issues, and stay together for a year after the baby is born, or are under a personal financial agreement for a year, can she file for child support after that year and get back child support? 5) What if I'm making 40K per year now, and I lose my job after 2 years and cannot find another job that pays that amount. Will the judge adjust my childsupport payment to reflect this, or will he look at my past income and education (college degree) and decide that I should be making the 40K and continue paying the original payment? I guess my main object is that of any single dads - get to see my kid as much as possible. I know some dads that never get to see their kids becuase the baby's mother makes it so hard for them. These same women go ballistic if they receive their child supoprt a day late. |
#10
|
|||
|
|||
Child Support Payment Question
"Mobile" wrote in message et... wrote in She cannot get back child support in all probability. Child support is typically payable beginning on the day that the support order was filed. If a support order is not filed, no liability for back support. In Michigan, they can and do collect CS from the day the child is born regardless of the day a petition is filed. I was hit with a $42,000 arrearage when I was finally notified some 8 years later. I've always been interested in your type of case. Did they use your current income to determine 8 years of retro CS, or did they use your year by year income to set the CS based on what you actually earned? |
Thread Tools | |
Display Modes | |
|
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
A dentist's child abuse crime (also: Pregnant citizens: URGENT) | Todd Gastaldo | Pregnancy | 1 | September 7th 05 11:00 PM |
OT The "Child's" Point Of View | Pop | Foster Parents | 7 | June 20th 05 03:13 AM |
Mother's Paternity Fraud - US Supreme Court Case | TrashBBRT | Child Support | 8 | May 21st 04 05:52 PM |
Kids should work. | ChrisScaife | Spanking | 16 | December 7th 03 04:27 AM |
Dennis was U.N. rules Canada should ban spanking | Kane | Spanking | 63 | November 17th 03 10:12 PM |