[META] going out to work vs motherhood dilema

I have not seen the original post (which was not posted to google),
and accordingly cannot -- and do not intend to -- comment upon the
question posed or language used by the original poster in the text of
her question. However, I am asking if the moderators could address
the civility issue as raised by the title of the thread. The
juxtaposition of two alternatives using *vs* to my mind means that the
two are oppositional and mutually exclusive. In other words, I read
this title as stating that women who *go[] out to work* are not
*mother[ing]* their children. I, for one, was extremely offended by
the title.

Barbara

In article , Barbara says...

I have not seen the original post (which was not posted to google),
and accordingly cannot -- and do not intend to -- comment upon the
question posed or language used by the original poster in the text of
her question. However, I am asking if the moderators could address
the civility issue as raised by the title of the thread. The
juxtaposition of two alternatives using *vs* to my mind means that the
two are oppositional and mutually exclusive. In other words, I read
this title as stating that women who *go[] out to work* are not
*mother[ing]* their children. I, for one, was extremely offended by
the title.

Barbara


Hi, Barbara,

A statement of an opinion, or implication of an opinion, is not uncivil per se.
You can refer to the misc.kids.moderated posting guidelines:

http://www.misckids.org/posting.txt

..and the misc.kids.moderated charter:

http://www.misckids.org/charter.txt

We think it's unlikely that the original poster quite meant the oppositional
implication that you see. Nonetheless, one of the advantages of having a forum
for civil discussion on raising kids is that you have an opportunity to make
your point.

Banty (misc.kids.moderated moderator speaking for the team)

"Barbara" wrote in message
m...
I have not seen the original post (which was not posted to google),
and accordingly cannot -- and do not intend to -- comment upon the
question posed or language used by the original poster in the text of
her question. However, I am asking if the moderators could address
the civility issue as raised by the title of the thread. The

This topic, or one very much like it, has been addressed before here (at
great length. Great length. GREEEEEAAAAAAAT Length).

I think a lot of long-time posters just took a deep breath and decided to
respond to the very real concerns of a new poster. I was irked by the
subject line, as well, but I decided it was probably just a description of
how she felt about her choices, vs. how she thinks people's lives are/must
be structured.

I try, with highly variable degrees of success, to apply two rules when I
come across something like this:

1. Give people the benefit of the doubt.
2. Cut them some slack.

As Banty wrote, it wasn't uncivil.

Best,
Ann