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#1
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Night weaning - 2yo?
Anyone have any advice? I'm at my wits end.
I messed up. My son has always fallen asleep nursing, and we still cosleep. Unfortunately, he has a BAD case of baby bottle tooth and is about to lose one tooth and at least one other is beginning to decay. My poor pretty baby with such an ugly mouth... I feel horribly guilty about it. Anyway, we don't really nurse on a schedule and I'm not really ready to wean yet, just from the night feedings. He's a VERY strong-willed child though, and is at that "tantrum" age where he'll scream and cry and throw fits if he doesn't get his way. I don't really want to let him cry it out over giving up nursing, but I'm not sure what else to do. I'm also a softie of a Mom! LOL... He's say "milk, Pleeeease!" and it just breaks my heart, so I keep giving in to him. I really know we need to give up this night milk for the sake of his teeth, though... so any tips would be GREAT! Thanks folks! |
#2
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Night weaning - 2yo?
Hi - There are several things you can try. ALL of them will require firmness on your part, but that's part of parenting. Just remember, if he starts to cry or have tantrums, that you don't let him run in the street, you don't let him hit other kids, and you don't let him have milk at night. Since he's already two, you have SOME slight chance of being able to reason with him. So talk with him about teeth and plaque. (In our house we brush away the "plaque monsters".) Talk about how you brush his teeth to keep them healthy, about how the plaque monsters eat his teeth so you brush them away, talk about how some foods are foods that plaque monsters like a LOT ... and then explain that plaque monsters don't drink milk in the daytime, but LOVE milk at night. Then get a sippy cup or bottle, whichever he'll take, and fill it with water. Make SURE he eats a lot in the evening (and tell him that he's got to eat enough to get him through to breakfast). Then tell him if he gets thirsty during the night he can have water. If the problem is just the nursing-before-bed issue, then discussing it, planning it and working it out with him for a few days, with a special day when he stops nursing to sleep, will probably work well. You might also reward him with a bedtime toy that he can hug while he drinks his water, or something like that. REPLACE the nursing session with something different that he'll like. (THe toy, an extra story, whatever.) It may still take a few nights of you being VERY firm and letting him cry, etc. before he gets it. If you also have him waking during the night to nurse, you might have a longer stretch of crying and tantrums. BUt since this is a serious health issue (you should apologize for the genes you passed on to him :-) then you need to be firm. Good luck. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. --Beth Kevles http://web.mit.edu/kevles/www/nomilk.html -- a page for the milk-allergic Disclaimer: Nothing in this message should be construed as medical advice. Please consult with your own medical practicioner. NOTE: No email is read at my MIT address. Use the AOL one if you would like me to reply. PS -- You're SURE it's the night nursing that's an issue, not food selection during the day? |
#3
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Night weaning - 2yo?
I've got no advice I'm afraid - I'm sorry to hear about your baby's teeth. :
( I didn't know that this could happen - surely it must be fairly common with babies who are breastfeeding all night? I've not heard it mentioned here before. I'd be interested in what other posters say. Good luck, ROSIE mum to Ella, nearly 16 months "Manna" wrote in message om... Anyone have any advice? I'm at my wits end. I messed up. My son has always fallen asleep nursing, and we still cosleep. Unfortunately, he has a BAD case of baby bottle tooth and is about to lose one tooth and at least one other is beginning to decay. My poor pretty baby with such an ugly mouth... I feel horribly guilty about it. Anyway, we don't really nurse on a schedule and I'm not really ready to wean yet, just from the night feedings. He's a VERY strong-willed child though, and is at that "tantrum" age where he'll scream and cry and throw fits if he doesn't get his way. I don't really want to let him cry it out over giving up nursing, but I'm not sure what else to do. I'm also a softie of a Mom! LOL... He's say "milk, Pleeeease!" and it just breaks my heart, so I keep giving in to him. I really know we need to give up this night milk for the sake of his teeth, though... so any tips would be GREAT! Thanks folks! |
#4
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Night weaning - 2yo?
Hmm. At 2, you can reason with them - sort of. How about offering a
compromise - you let him nurse at night, but he has to submit to having his teeth brushed afterward. It means no more nursing to sleep, but does not eliminate a nursing before bed. Maybe? -Shannon "Manna" wrote in message om... Anyone have any advice? I'm at my wits end. I messed up. My son has always fallen asleep nursing, and we still cosleep. Unfortunately, he has a BAD case of baby bottle tooth and is about to lose one tooth and at least one other is beginning to decay. My poor pretty baby with such an ugly mouth... I feel horribly guilty about it. Anyway, we don't really nurse on a schedule and I'm not really ready to wean yet, just from the night feedings. He's a VERY strong-willed child though, and is at that "tantrum" age where he'll scream and cry and throw fits if he doesn't get his way. I don't really want to let him cry it out over giving up nursing, but I'm not sure what else to do. I'm also a softie of a Mom! LOL... He's say "milk, Pleeeease!" and it just breaks my heart, so I keep giving in to him. I really know we need to give up this night milk for the sake of his teeth, though... so any tips would be GREAT! Thanks folks! |
#5
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Night weaning - 2yo?
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#6
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Night weaning - 2yo?
Manna wrote:
I don't really want to let him cry it out over giving up nursing, but I'm not sure what else to do. My sympathies. I started to night-wean at 18 months because of weight issues. It was heart-breaking, but I think you just need to focus on the long-term benefits rather than the short-term crying. It was a long process for us, but maybe there are some ideas here you can use. First, I didn't stop nursing him to sleep. I first eliminated the middle of the night sessions. He did cry and thrash and beg. I made sure I was always dressed in PJs where I could tuck the shirt in and not provide any kind of access for him. I still held him to comfort him, and we tried to find other ways to soothe him back to sleep. Since he was learning his shapes then, I offered to rub his back in circles or squares. This did not solve his problem at first, but after a few days he would express a preference. "Circles!" "Now squares!" I think it helped give him something else to focus on as he fell to sleep. Next, we stopped nursing to sleep at night. This was perhaps the most difficult part and took the longest to resolve. We rock to sleep while I tell him stories that we make up every day. Usually, they all start the same way ("Once upon a time there was a little boy named ... and he lived in a house with a mommy, daddy and a dog named Wiley. One day when B woke up he ...) Often, it's just a recap of our day with special attention paid to something new he learned, a lesson I want to reinforce (no hitting), or a special place/person we visited. Again, it distracted him, and since he was draped over my shoulder, he wasn't in a position or place he associated with nursing. I can't tell you that night-weaning ended the night waking. Even at 2.75yo, he's still very dependent on our night-time ritual. (Which means I am still the only one who puts him to bed). I don't know if you've considered letting the dad take on part of the bed-time duties or even if that's an option in your home, but some have reported success with that. I think you just have to brace for a few tears as you both make the adjustment. Good luck! -- JM |
#7
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Night weaning - 2yo?
"Manna" wrote in message om... Anyone have any advice? I'm at my wits end. I messed up. My son has always fallen asleep nursing, and we still cosleep. Unfortunately, he has a BAD case of baby bottle tooth and is about to lose one tooth and at least one other is beginning to decay. My poor pretty baby with such an ugly mouth... I feel horribly guilty about it. http://www.mothering.com/10-0-0/html...cavities.shtml From that article, it sounds like you need to just work out a way to up his immune system, get him some more vitamin D, etc. I would be inclined to do that first myself if Meg develops caries, rather than go straight to night weaning. BM has antibiotic properties, after all, we put it on wounds and skin problems. -- Dagny |
#8
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Night weaning - 2yo?
"Rosie" wrote in message ... I've got no advice I'm afraid - I'm sorry to hear about your baby's teeth. : ( I didn't know that this could happen - surely it must be fairly common with babies who are breastfeeding all night? I've not heard it mentioned here before. I'd be interested in what other posters say. Its not night nursing, its babies who keep the nipple in their mouth ALL night. Having a few nursing sessions is ok, its when kid with teeth do that nipple hanging in their mouth, letting a slow trickle of milk flow continually thing, that its a problem. The saliva doesnt have the chance to rinse away the milk from the teeth. I weaned my daughter totally when I noticed her front teeth looking a little funny. Actually, she didnt mind at all. I just was holding her one day and she was just lolling about on my lap, sucking here and there every few seconds. I unlatched her, let her keep sleeping and never offered the breast again. She never asked either. A child who can be content with nursing in spurts, but unlatching in between, shouldnt have dental problems. Its when they hang on for extended periods that its an issue. |
#9
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Night weaning - 2yo?
I really know we need to give up this night milk for the sake of his teeth, though... so any tips would be GREAT! The book "The No-Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley has a very detailed plan for teaching your child to go to sleep without nursing or using a pacifier. It takes several days, but uses very effective operant conditioning techniques to "re-train" your child with little to no emotional trauma. Another suggestion would be to brush your child's teeth more frequently (after all meals and snacks-- at least 5 times a day) and to use a toothpaste containing xylitol. Xylitol is a sugar that occurs naturally in certain berries and in the bark of birch trees. Unlike most sugars, xylitol can actually prevent tooth decay (it's also linked with reduced rates of ear infections). For more information on the science behind this, see http://www.xylitol.org/ I use an infant-safe tooth gel with xylitol for brushing my daughter's teeth. I get it at http://www.sprydental.com/ I have no link with the company other than being a customer. -- kirsti |
#10
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Night weaning - 2yo?
"Rosie" wrote in message ...
I've got no advice I'm afraid - I'm sorry to hear about your baby's teeth. : ( I didn't know that this could happen - surely it must be fairly common with babies who are breastfeeding all night? I've not heard it mentioned here before. I'd be interested in what other posters say. Good luck, ROSIE mum to Ella, nearly 16 months Me too! I have heard of this but it's the first time I've seen parents discussing it. My husband and I BOTH have horrible teeth and my ds is nursing throughout the night. I guess I'd better do something... The dr. wrote an Rx for vitamins with flouride (because we live in a rural area where our house is served by a private well. She didn't mention the teeth problem though). However, I have not gotten the Rx filled yet. (bad mom) HW |
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