If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. |
|
|
Thread Tools | Display Modes |
#21
|
|||
|
|||
"Joelle" wrote in message ... As a minister, do you ever counsel teens on sexual issues? Do you have the whole confidentiality issue's to deal with? Yes, and I tell the parents exactly what I intend to say. And I tell kids upfront that if I think their parents need to know something I'll tell them and I tell them why I think it's important that their parents know what is going on ...I also talk about how just because parents may react to something negatively and with anger and disappointment right away, it doesn't mean they don't love them and that they aren't going to be there to help them through whatever it is they have gotten themselves into. If that means they won't tell me stuff, well that's too bad, but I don't believe it is helpful to kids to keep secrets from their parents. An actually confession of sin is something else. Except for sexual abuse which I am required by law to report, anything said in the context of confession cannot be repeated but I can encourage the kid to tell their parents. Sexual abuse is the only form of abuse you are required to report? What about if the child is threatening to harm oneself? I understand certain conversations my daughter has with counselors and ministers are not going to be reported to me. But I don't expect people like my kids friends parents to advise them about where to get birth control. I understand what you mean, I would want to know also. But first and formost, I want my kid to not do anything stupid and if another adult prevents that, that is good too. I would just hope that the adult could confide in me also. T |
#22
|
|||
|
|||
Sexual abuse is the only form of abuse you are required to report? What
about if the child is threatening to harm oneself? Thinking about suicide isn't usually something that one brings into the confession...of course I'd tell their parents, but legally the only thing clergy are required to report is sexual abuse. Everything else is really up to our own discretion. But if someone tells me in confession that they murdered someone, I can't be required to testify to that. Although the law's changing and there is less and less respect for clergy so I suppose that will come to an end soon... I want my kid to not do anything stupid and if another adult prevents that, that is good too. I just don't think telling a kid where to get free birth control is preventing anything stupid. I would just hope that the adult could confide in me also. That's all I'm asking for. "Hey, Tiffany, your kid was at my house asking about birth control, you might want to check that out" "Oh thanks Joelle, and I'll try to bring it up in a way so it doesn't look like you came tattling" is a conversation that can do a kid a lot more good than an address for a clinic. IMO. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle |
#23
|
|||
|
|||
|
#24
|
|||
|
|||
"Joelle" wrote in message ... Sexual abuse is the only form of abuse you are required to report? What about if the child is threatening to harm oneself? Thinking about suicide isn't usually something that one brings into the confession...of course I'd tell their parents, but legally the only thing clergy are required to report is sexual abuse. Everything else is really up to our own discretion. But if someone tells me in confession that they murdered someone, I can't be required to testify to that. Although the law's changing and there is less and less respect for clergy so I suppose that will come to an end soon... Good. I also think that should apply to other areas of confidentiality in the case of murder. But that's my own personal opinion. I want my kid to not do anything stupid and if another adult prevents that, that is good too. I just don't think telling a kid where to get free birth control is preventing anything stupid. Huh? I don't see the logic in that sentence. I would just hope that the adult could confide in me also. That's all I'm asking for. "Hey, Tiffany, your kid was at my house asking about birth control, you might want to check that out" "Oh thanks Joelle, and I'll try to bring it up in a way so it doesn't look like you came tattling" is a conversation that can do a kid a lot more good than an address for a clinic. IMO. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle Nah I'm with Cele on this one. You both have great points and I don't see an end in sight to this disagreement so let's all agree to disagree shall we? Christine |
#25
|
|||
|
|||
Are there issues besides sex that you'd keep a kid's confidence about?
From their parents? That involved their health and safety? "Please pastor, don't tell my Mom I copied my sermon report"...I 'd probably not tell. Unless they made a habit of it.. That's making quite an assumption about the parent's response. Well, see that's what kind of ****ing me off. There seems to be an assumption that parents are the worst people to tell about what's going on in their kids life. I don't believe that assumption . And I don't like the idea that other people assume they know better than me what's good for my kids. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle |
#26
|
|||
|
|||
I just don't think telling a kid where to get free birth control is
preventing anything stupid. Huh? I don't see the logic in that sentence. I don't believe telling kids where to get birth control prevents them from doing stupid things. How is that illogical? Nah I'm with Cele on this one Oh I'm well aware I'm in the minority on this subject - not just here but in life. II happen to believe that is part of the problem. I don't see an end in sight to this disagreement so let's all agree to disagree shall we? Well ya know, I usually do let Cele have the last word but I just might not this time. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle |
#27
|
|||
|
|||
"Joelle" wrote in message ... I just don't think telling a kid where to get free birth control is preventing anything stupid. Huh? I don't see the logic in that sentence. I don't believe telling kids where to get birth control prevents them from doing stupid things. How is that illogical? Nah I'm with Cele on this one Oh I'm well aware I'm in the minority on this subject - not just here but in life. II happen to believe that is part of the problem. I don't see an end in sight to this disagreement so let's all agree to disagree shall we? Well ya know, I usually do let Cele have the last word but I just might not this time. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle lol.... I don't think you are alone in your thinking. I think each situation must be dealt with on an individual bases. Each child is different as well as the parents. I just spoke with my daughter..... kind of just a... "You know, you can talk to me if and when you are ready for anything sexual to happen. Whether I agree or not, I want you to have the right knowledge and protection. If its not me, talk to someone at school, NOT a friend, as they are lacking knowledge too." She just says.... "Mom, I am not going to have sex anytime soon." She still insists that you don't have sex unless you want a kid. Yeah, sure, its that easy. lol T |
#28
|
|||
|
|||
|
#29
|
|||
|
|||
So you make subjective decisions about what to tell parents about
That's right everyone does. The crux of this is not privacy, I never thought it was about privacy it's that you see sex as a health and safety issue and cele sees it as a social issue -- or maybe even a "public health" issue rather than a moral issue. None of which changes my view. I don't see a difference between an assumption that a parent would react positively and an assumption that a parent would react negatively. I certainly see a big difference. It makes a difference of whether or not the parental role is going to be supported, and that has a big impact on soceity. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle |
#30
|
|||
|
|||
"Joelle" wrote in message ... I just don't think telling a kid where to get free birth control is preventing anything stupid. Huh? I don't see the logic in that sentence. I don't believe telling kids where to get birth control prevents them from doing stupid things. How is that illogical? I think pointing them in the right direction, in this case for birthcontrol, is preventative. They take the medication, it prevents teen pregnancy... that's logical. These kids are already having sex so the abstenance arguement doesn't apply. Nah I'm with Cele on this one Oh I'm well aware I'm in the minority on this subject - not just here but in life. II happen to believe that is part of the problem. You see it as a problem, I don't. I don't see an end in sight to this disagreement so let's all agree to disagree shall we? Well ya know, I usually do let Cele have the last word but I just might not this time. Joelle The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page - St Augustine Joelle Fair enough, but it's an arguement that will have no winners. Christine |
Thread Tools | |
Display Modes | |
|
|
Similar Threads | ||||
Thread | Thread Starter | Forum | Replies | Last Post |
Article by Carol Ummel Lindquist, Ph.D. - Happily Married with Kids | Jane Smith | General | 0 | July 27th 04 02:17 PM |
misc.kids FAQ on Good things about having kids | [email protected] | Info and FAQ's | 0 | June 28th 04 07:42 PM |
WSJ: How to Give Your Child A Longer Life | Jean B. | General | 0 | December 9th 03 06:10 PM |
FWD bad judgement or abuse Trunk kids begged to ride | Kane | General | 2 | August 5th 03 05:54 PM |