Setting a routine advice needed

I'm trying to set a bedtime routine for Emily-Rose. I'm not too sure if she is too young to be set this but I need my bed back !!

At present her daily sleep / awake routine is like this -

8-9am - Awake
2pm ish - 30 min nap
7pm ish- Nap - usually 1-2hr
then awake till 1am !!
I then get tired and take her to bed with me..............yes in my bed as I am too tired to argue.

ERH is now 9 1/2mth and some nights will sleep in her cot but only if she falls asleep on my knee after 8 or 9pm then I transfer her to the cot.

She wakes 2-3 times during the night if left in the cot and tosses and turns if in my bed but does sleep, but I don't get much.

I want to try to do a routine like this -
8-9am - Awake
2pm ish - 2hr nap
7pm - bath & quiet time (stories / calm time, no toys)
8pm ish- Bedtime whilst awake

Any advice on whether she is too young to do this with or tips on how to get her to sleep in the cot WITHOUT her screaming for an hour..........which currently happens, appreciated.

Tired-in-the-uk !!
--
--
Karen
DS 10th Aug 1986 - VB - 9lb 13oz
DD 13th Aug 1988 - VB - 10lb 9oz
DD 28th Apr 2005 - VB - 9lb 4oz
---------
Emily-Rose
updated 26/1
http://photobucket.com/albums/v356/k...slideshow=true

kazh wrote:
I'm trying to set a bedtime routine for Emily-Rose. I'm not too sure if she is too young to be set this but I need my bed back !!

At present her daily sleep / awake routine is like this -

8-9am - Awake
2pm ish - 30 min nap
7pm ish- Nap - usually 1-2hr
then awake till 1am !!
I then get tired and take her to bed with me..............yes in my bed as I am too tired to argue.

ERH is now 9 1/2mth and some nights will sleep in her cot but only if she falls asleep on my knee after 8 or 9pm then I transfer her to the cot.

She wakes 2-3 times during the night if left in the cot and tosses and turns if in my bed but does sleep, but I don't get much.

I want to try to do a routine like this -
8-9am - Awake
2pm ish - 2hr nap
7pm - bath & quiet time (stories / calm time, no toys)
8pm ish- Bedtime whilst awake

Any advice on whether she is too young to do this with or tips on how to get her to sleep in the cot WITHOUT her screaming for an hour..........which currently happens, appreciated.

Hmmm...she might be ready for that schedule, but at
that age my kids weren't. At that age, they were still doing
both morning and afternoon naps, and the schedule was something
like:

7am - wake
9-9:30am - morning nap (about 1.5 hours)
1-1:30pm - afternoon nap (about 2 hours)
7:30pm - bedtime

Is it possible that she is overtired and that is what is
causing the trouble? Might it help to add in the morning
nap?

If she is ready to move to only one nap a day (which
mine did around 12-13 months), their schedule was more like:

7am - wake
noon - nap (2-3 hours)
7:30pm - bedtime

And usually the transition took a while, with them sometimes
needing to have the afternoon nap earlier and then being
cranky in the evening before bedtime.

Actually, come to think of it, your schedule isn't
far off from my babies' two nap schedule, just skewed a
few hours later on waking and then drifting later and
later with the two naps. She may really *need* the
two naps, but to accomplish that in a reasonable time
frame, you might need to start earlier and leave less
time before you put her down for naps.

Best wishes,
Ericka

Hi there
Don't know how much help this will be to you but all of my kids have been
fantastic sleepers and have all followed pretty much the same routine. They
were sleeping through the night fully by the time they were 4 months old. DD
slept through from 6 weeks.

Wake 7 am
Nap 11am (1 hour)
Nap 2pm (1 hour)
Betime 7pm

I tried to keep my babies/toddlers really active throughout the day and we
always went for walks in the fresh air. Bedtime was kept very calm and
quiet, we had a bath, story and then bottle and then off to bed. My DS2
would only sleep if there was music on so I kept a radio in his room that
was only on just loud enough to hear. DS1 liked to have a clock ticking
near to his cot so thats what he had and DD had one of those light show
thingys. She was always asleep before it finished playing though!
Every child is different and you just have to be consistent. Obviously it
is not possible to put your child to bed at exactly the same time everyday
but just try and keep to a similar routine each day.
I know everyone has very different opinions on co-sleeping but I have never
done it. My kids were in Cots until they were about 2 when they moved to a
bed. I can't really offer any advice on the transition as I have never had
to do it but a friend of mine used to put an item of her worn clothing in
the childs cot when they went to bed and they went straight to sleep.
HTH
Clair

I think, first of all, that you are going to have to start getting her up at
7-7:30am, which should make her tired by 9-10-11am. Let her sleep for an
hour, then get her back up. Then try to schedule active things in the
afternoon. If she's not walking yet, at least make her crawl a lot to get
her favorite toy, or you, etc. Then put her down for another nap around
3pm, and again, only let her sleep for an hour. Then, she should be okay to
put to bed around 8ish (just past her regular late night nap). The first
few days/week will be the worst, but if you stick through it, you can make
it happen. If she wakes up in the night (thinking that the 8pm sleep is a
nap), you can try to breastfeed/bottle feed her and then put her straight
back down. Just keep talking to her and telling her that it's night night
time.

When she currently wakes during the night in her cot, does she fall back
asleep without you assistance/input, or do you need to feed her or rock her
or something? In the beginning, I'd just worry about getting her days on a
more normal schedule, and after she seems acclimated to that, then I'd work
on the nights.

Addie was a really good napper, but consistently woke 2-3 times a night
until well past a year. Well, she'd have a period where she would sleep
through the night for a few weeks in a row, but then something would cause
her to wake again. Finally, when she was 14 months old, I made her cry it
out one night. And, one night was all it took. I checked on her every
15-20 minutes. 2 hours of my life, and she's been sleeping through the
night ever since. I wish I'd done it earlier!
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys, 1/3/03
Addison Grace, 9/30/04

Check out the family! -- www.MyFamily.com, User ID: Clarkguest1, Password:
Guest
Become a member for free - go to Add Member to set up your own User ID and
Password

"kazh" wrote in message
...
I'm trying to set a bedtime routine for Emily-Rose. I'm not too sure if she
is too young to be set this but I need my bed back !!

At present her daily sleep / awake routine is like this -

8-9am - Awake
2pm ish - 30 min nap
7pm ish- Nap - usually 1-2hr
then awake till 1am !!
I then get tired and take her to bed with me..............yes in my bed as I
am too tired to argue.

ERH is now 9 1/2mth and some nights will sleep in her cot but only if she
falls asleep on my knee after 8 or 9pm then I transfer her to the cot.

She wakes 2-3 times during the night if left in the cot and tosses and turns
if in my bed but does sleep, but I don't get much.

I want to try to do a routine like this -
8-9am - Awake
2pm ish - 2hr nap
7pm - bath & quiet time (stories / calm time, no toys)
8pm ish- Bedtime whilst awake

Any advice on whether she is too young to do this with or tips on how to get
her to sleep in the cot WITHOUT her screaming for an hour..........which
currently happens, appreciated.

Tired-in-the-uk !!
--
--
Karen
DS 10th Aug 1986 - VB - 9lb 13oz
DD 13th Aug 1988 - VB - 10lb 9oz
DD 28th Apr 2005 - VB - 9lb 4oz
---------
Emily-Rose
updated 26/1
http://photobucket.com/albums/v356/k...slideshow=true

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message ...
Hmmm...she might be ready for that schedule, but at
that age my kids weren't. At that age, they were still doing
both morning and afternoon naps, and the schedule was something
like:

7am - wake
9-9:30am - morning nap (about 1.5 hours)
1-1:30pm - afternoon nap (about 2 hours)
7:30pm - bedtime

Is it possible that she is overtired and that is what is
causing the trouble? Might it help to add in the morning
nap?

She won't sleep in the morning. She sets her own naps at present and will only sleep if in my arms

If she is ready to move to only one nap a day (which
mine did around 12-13 months), their schedule was more like:

7am - wake
noon - nap (2-3 hours)
7:30pm - bedtime

And usually the transition took a while, with them sometimes
needing to have the afternoon nap earlier and then being
cranky in the evening before bedtime.

Sounds like ERH, very cranky when she's tired. A bottle will get her to sleep when this happens but again she'll go to sleep in my arms not in the cot.

Actually, come to think of it, your schedule isn't
far off from my babies' two nap schedule, just skewed a
few hours later on waking and then drifting later and
later with the two naps. She may really *need* the
two naps, but to accomplish that in a reasonable time
frame, you might need to start earlier and leave less
time before you put her down for naps.

Thanks.

Best wishes,
Ericka

"Clair Pepper" wrote in message ...
Hi there
Don't know how much help this will be to you but all of my kids have been
fantastic sleepers and have all followed pretty much the same routine. They
were sleeping through the night fully by the time they were 4 months old. DD
slept through from 6 weeks.

Wake 7 am
Nap 11am (1 hour)
Nap 2pm (1 hour)
Betime 7pm

I tried to keep my babies/toddlers really active throughout the day and we always went for walks in the fresh air.

She's VERY active and in to everything. If I take her for a walk she'll fall asleep then it upsets the rest of her day.


Bedtime was kept very calm and quiet, we had a bath, story and then bottle and then off to bed. My DS2 would only sleep if there was music on so I kept a radio in his room that was only on just loud enough to hear. DS1 liked to have a clock ticking
near to his cot so thats what he had and DD had one of those light show thingys. She was always asleep before it finished playing though!
Every child is different and you just have to be consistent.

We've tried the nighttime musical light but she just loves it. She wants to play with it. She'll only sleep in the cot if I hold my hand on her. If I move my hand she wakes up.

Obviously it is not possible to put your child to bed at exactly the same time everyday but just try and keep to a similar routine each day.I know everyone has very different opinions on co-sleeping but I have never done it. My kids were in Cots until they were about 2 when they moved to a bed.

DS & DD1 were both like that but DD2 is a little tike !!

I can't really offer any advice on the transition as I have never had to do it but a friend of mine used to put an item of her worn clothing in the childs cot when they went to bed and they went straight to sleep.

Thanks Clair, we tried the clothing in the cot thing too.......no joy.


HTH
Clair

"Jamie Clark" wrote in message ...
I think, first of all, that you are going to have to start getting her up at 7-7:30am, which should make her tired by 9-10-11am. Let her sleep for an hour, then get her back up.

Once awake she is awake for at least 4 hours.

Then try to schedule active things in the afternoon. If she's not walking yet, at least make her crawl a lot to get her favorite toy, or you, etc.

We do 3 mornings a week at mother and toddler groups and even they aren't wearing her out !!

Then put her down for another nap around 3pm, and again, only let her sleep for an hour.

Will try only letting her sleep for an hour

(just looking at her now, hyper at 11.25pm.......long night ahead me thinks!!)


Then, she should be okay to put to bed around 8ish (just past her regular late night nap). The first few days/week will be the worst, but if you stick through it, you can make it happen. If she wakes up in the night (thinking that the 8pm sleep is a nap), you can try to breastfeed/bottle feed her and then put her straight
back down. Just keep talking to her and telling her that it's night night time.

Will try this again, she usually just screams till you pick her up.

When she currently wakes during the night in her cot, does she fall back asleep without you assistance/input, or do you need to feed her or rock her or something? In the beginning, I'd just worry about getting her days on a more normal schedule, and after she seems acclimated to that, then I'd work on the nights.

She has to be held in my arms or I put my hand on her and hold her quite firmly in the cot till she nods off again.Usually 5 minutes or so.

Addie was a really good napper, but consistently woke 2-3 times a night until well past a year. Well, she'd have a period where she would sleep through the night for a few weeks in a row, but then something would cause her to wake again.

Ditto. ERH slept through the night from 11 weeks till about 6 months, then the pattern we have now started. Occassionally she will sleep through without waking but it's so infrequent now

Finally, when she was 14 months old, I made her cry it
out one night. And, one night was all it took. I checked on her every 15-20 minutes. 2 hours of my life, and she's been sleeping through the night ever since. I wish I'd done it earlier!

I know this is going to be the way to go in the end but the thought of leaving her to scream just kills me. I hate to hear her cry and leaving her there makes it worse. But I guess it all else fails I'll have to try it again.

Thanks Jamie
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys, 1/3/03
Addison Grace, 9/30/04

"kazh" wrote in message
...
"Jamie Clark" wrote in message
...

Finally, when she was 14 months old, I made her cry it
out one night. And, one night was all it took. I checked on her every
15-20 minutes. 2 hours of my life, and she's been sleeping through the
night ever since. I wish I'd done it earlier!

I know this is going to be the way to go in the end but the thought of
leaving her to scream just kills me. I hate to hear her cry and leaving
her there makes it worse. But I guess it all else fails I'll have to try
it again.

Thanks Jamie


--------------------------------------

You know, my guess is that she depends on you to fall asleep because she
can. She'll be ****ed, and really really mad, but if you can get through
the hard part of crying it out, you will succeed in teaching her to fall
asleep without your physical presense. It should make nights and naps much
easier. If you really can't stand to hear her cry, see if dh can do it for
you, and you go spend the weekend at your parents or a friend's house. Or,
if dh isn't any stronger than you, see if your parents/in-laws, or friends
want to take this on for you. Hugs.

There is also the slow wean method, where instead of touching her to put her
back to sleep, you stand where she can see you and just talk to her in a
soothing voice until she goes to sleep. Then, start slowly moving farther
and farther away, each night. After a week, you may be able to be out of
the room, or at least at the door. Personally speaking, I'd rather do one
really hard night, then drag it out for a week or longer. But that's just
me.

Good luck, with whatever you end up doing.
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys, 1/3/03
Addison Grace, 9/30/04

Check out the family! -- www.MyFamily.com, User ID: Clarkguest1, Password:
Guest
Become a member for free - go to Add Member to set up your own User ID and
Password

"Jamie Clark" wrote in message ...

You know, my guess is that she depends on you to fall asleep because she
can. She'll be ****ed, and really really mad, but if you can get through
the hard part of crying it out, you will succeed in teaching her to fall
asleep without your physical presense. It should make nights and naps much
easier. If you really can't stand to hear her cry, see if dh can do it for
you, and you go spend the weekend at your parents or a friend's house. Or,
if dh isn't any stronger than you, see if your parents/in-laws, or friends
want to take this on for you. Hugs.

There is also the slow wean method, where instead of touching her to put her
back to sleep, you stand where she can see you and just talk to her in a
soothing voice until she goes to sleep. Then, start slowly moving farther
and farther away, each night. After a week, you may be able to be out of
the room, or at least at the door. Personally speaking, I'd rather do one
really hard night, then drag it out for a week or longer. But that's just
me.

Good luck, with whatever you end up doing.
--

Jamie
Earth Angels:
Taylor Marlys, 1/3/03
Addison Grace, 9/30/04

-------------------------------------
I was tired at 12 last night and she was yawning but fighting sleep as usual. I took her to bed, put her in the cot, turned on her musical nightlight said goodnight it's bedtime and got into my bed. She moaned a bit and kept getting up in the cot. After 20 minutes she was screaming but tired. I lay her down, put my hand firmly on her and she went to sleep after 5 minutes.

I was still up 3 times in the the night , with my hand on her to calm her, but she slept in the cot all night.

She woke at 8am today and we are going to try the new routine today. Will let you know how we get on.

Thanks for the advice. DH is no stronger than me for hearing her cry but if we are going to get any routine set we are going to have to be stronger.

"kazh" wrote in message
...
I'm trying to set a bedtime routine for Emily-Rose. I'm not too sure if she
is too young to be set this but I need my bed back !!

At present her daily sleep / awake routine is like this -

8-9am - Awake
2pm ish - 30 min nap
7pm ish- Nap - usually 1-2hr
then awake till 1am !!
I then get tired and take her to bed with me..............yes in my bed as I
am too tired to argue.

ERH is now 9 1/2mth and some nights will sleep in her cot but only if she
falls asleep on my knee after 8 or 9pm then I transfer her to the cot.

She wakes 2-3 times during the night if left in the cot and tosses and turns
if in my bed but does sleep, but I don't get much.

I want to try to do a routine like this -
8-9am - Awake
2pm ish - 2hr nap
7pm - bath & quiet time (stories / calm time, no toys)
8pm ish- Bedtime whilst awake

Any advice on whether she is too young to do this with or tips on how to get
her to sleep in the cot WITHOUT her screaming for an hour..........which
currently happens, appreciated.


I don't think her screaming for an hour is terrible, if that is the way you
decide to go. I can think of a few children who screamed for 4+ hours for
the first few times. Have you tried putting her down for several days? If
you haven't you may find that the first time it's an hour, but gradually
gets less until it's not more than 5 minutes. The only time we did it with
#1 it was 55 minutes the first night, 5 minutes the second, and the third
she whimpered a couple of times and went back to sleep.
The route I think I'd go would be starting by trying to keep her awake (even
if miserable) until 8-9pm. Might be naughty and give her calpol (unless it
makes her hyper) to help her sleep for the first couple of nights. Then do
the night routine. If she does wake, then I'd give 10 minutes of feed on
either side (or whatever you do) in the dark, then put her back and close
the door.
Not sure how you turn a 30 min nap into 2 hour, but #1 did this
spontaneously at 10 months, so it may be easy!