b-day party ettiquette

On Tue, 02 Oct 2007 20:53:18 -0700, wrote:

Seems any "going out could be done on the alternate weeks."

Yes, but you have no control over this. You significant other does.
Talk to him about it and see what he says.


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..

The Outer Limits

On Oct 2, 7:57 am, wrote:
On Oct 1, 10:11 pm, cjra wrote:





On Oct 1, 1:08 pm, wrote:

On Oct 1, 12:00 pm, Ericka Kammerer wrote:

Banty wrote:
In article .com,
says...

Ok, I need some help on this one. Mykidsare grown and they seem to
be well adjusted,caring human beings. My fiancee has younger
children. 6 and 8, both girls, he shares every other week custody.
He is also in law enforcement. When there is a shift party,get
together, cookout etc, he insists on taking his children if the event
falls on his week. I think adultpartiesare ADULTPARTIESunless the
event is "family" or " bring thekids" specified.

Since these don't usually have formal invites, it's murkier. So it depends more
on what the practice is, and the specifics. You're kinda rolling very different
things all together.

You're right that it's important to figure out
what the situation is before making assumptions, but there
are certainly workpartiesthat are adult only, and most
work events I've seen are usually pretty clear about whether
the whole family is invited, or just spouses, or just the
employee. Even for non-workparties, just because the event
is casual doesn't mean that it can't be an adult party. Again,
lots of folks have cookouts and such that they intend for adults.
If you're showing up and you're the only one withkids, that's
probably a bad sign. If you have to call the host and ask if
you can bring yourkids, that's a bad sign.

Best wishes,
Ericka

Yeah, its pretty murky for me too. Usually, I thought if it would be
considered "family" it would be family, if you have one. If not, feel
free to come anyway. If it is adults or pretty much assumed adult,
then the invite would say nothing else. Except bring your significant
other (ie spouse, girl/boy friend ), something along that line. I have
only known of one, with exception of Christmas bring the entire family
party, that mentioned kids.

Do you always receive written invitations to such events? If so, then
I guess it's clear, but for most of the events we've been to, it's
always been assumed kids we invited - and they were (and this was long
before I had kids). It depends on the type of event, but it's a rare
occasion - at a _casual_ house party when someone specifically
doesn't invite kids.

I understand some people drink a little
or alot. Not a judgement on my part. However, I wouldnt want to be
at a party to kick back and drink and relax if someone decided to
bring their kids. I, for one, drink very little if at all when there
are kids around. I think others should respect the kids being there.

LOL! Sorry, I think this is funny. It's very considerate of you -
except, I don't get what you're respecting? Do you think children
should not know that grown ups consume alcohol?

We drink wine most nights with dinner, right in front of DD ;-)- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

No, If someone wants to drink that is fine. I drink. Do you want to
be the to regualte how much someone drinks and what they are drinking
and saying? I do not. Normally, I am not out getting bombed. My
kids have not seen me consume more than 2-3 drinks at any one sitting.
I think I am suppose to set some type of standard for them. To shelter
them and protect them. Am I off?

I am fairly certain that at some point in her life, my kid will
witness an adult getting drunk. Hopefully she'll take from that that
it's silly to overinduldge and act stupid. I really don't think I need
to shelter her from that. But there's a difference from a party where
alcohol is consumed and a Men Only Weekend.