Discouraging

No, nothing to do with baby. She's doing great.

I've wanted throughout this pregnancy to deliver naturally, no drugs. I do
understand that I might change my mind in the middle of it; and I know that
sometimes medical conditions present themselves that make more rigorous
interventions necessary. I trust my midwives, and if they tell me that my
baby needs to be induced or removed surgically, I won't hesitate. Like each
of us, what I want most out of all of this is a healthy child.

But, wow, I don't know ANYBODY who's given birth naturally. The most recent
births here at my office are one coworker whose wife had an unexpected c-
section, and a woman who was induced at 42 weeks. Every woman I've talked to
has had scheduled sections, or inductions with epidurals. And every situation
is different, and I don't know enough details about ANY of their stories to
even hazard a guess about what the reasons were.

Like I said, I don't know what's going to happen with us. We're doing what
we can - I'm working to urge her into a good birth position, I'm doing my
kegels, DH is reviewing all of our baby class materials. I've also got a
birth plan that covers contingencies such as potential cesarean. I know that
plans and realities often differ, and I think I'm prepared psychologically for
that possibility.

I just have NOBODY to talk to who's been able to do it the way I'd like to.
I got the old "You don't get a medal for suffering" line when I mentioned I
hadn't already requested an epidural. I don't want to "suffer," I just want
to have my baby safely, and as naturally as possible.

Sorry to rant. I guess I'm just feeling sort of isolated.

Liz
EDD 5/22/04

--

"No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings. Man's reason and
spirit have often solved the seemingly unsolvable - and we believe they
can do it again." -- John F. Kennedy, 6/10/1963

"Elizabeth H Bonesteel" wrote in message
...
No, nothing to do with baby. She's doing great.
I just have NOBODY to talk to who's been able to do it the way I'd like
to.
I got the old "You don't get a medal for suffering" line when I mentioned
I
hadn't already requested an epidural. I don't want to "suffer," I just
want
to have my baby safely, and as naturally as possible.

Sorry to rant. I guess I'm just feeling sort of isolated.

Liz

Have you been to a LaLecheLeague meeting? They welcome moms-to-be to come
to a meeting before giving birth to make connections, etc. Anyway,
practically everyone I had met there gave birth unmedicated.

Meanwhile, my 2 best friends who have had children have done it unmedicated,
and each of their experiences are extremely different. I tried really hard
but medical complications made it impossible (in my opinion, of course). I
feel like such a quitter.

Nancy
EDD 5/22/04

--

"No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings. Man's reason and
spirit have often solved the seemingly unsolvable - and we believe
they
can do it again." -- John F. Kennedy, 6/10/1963

My first child, my lovely daughter was a "natural" childbirth. They are
right, it's not called labour without reason, I wanted to die LOL Just
over 4 hours from start to finish, I had my sister and husband (now ex)
with me as well as the midwives.

Chances are you'll go into labour "naturally," and God and doctors
willing, without any more interferance than absolutely necessary. Don't
be daunted by others' experiences, mine was NOTHING like I thought, or
like anyone elses I knew, I doubt this baby's birth will resemble the
last either. Make sure you have your husband be your advocate too, mine
was a little weak to be in that position, so I brought along my sister
who doesn't go backwards in coming forwards if you know what I mean. I
couldn't respect her more for being there, and making sure that no-one
overstepped my plans.

I've noticed that a lot of the women that get caught up in "failure to
progress," leading to LOTS of interferance, let them rupture their
water, perhaps you could look into that and decide if you want to
decline that if it's offered. Having said that, I'd gotten to the stage
of like near complete dialation and mine hadn't ruptured so I let them
do it.

Now as for the medal for suffering *growls* I was given the "would you
refuse anasthesia for a filling in your tooth? there's no reason for the
suffering" crap... I've never added to, or endangered the health of my
family by going to the dentist, and I've never had a headache for
months, nor have I had the inability to walk after a filling. I
understand your stand, but also understand that it gets WAY unbearable,
and you might want to take the edge off which is totally understandable
too. Another point to mention, I've watched birth stories on TV, and
watched how women effortlessly give birth with an epidural, and enjoy
the whole thing. When my daughter was born, I was still reeling in pain
with stitches being sewn and had to hand her to my sister and couldn't
feed until they had finished up which then hurt because you contract
when you feed. So, there IS something to be said about medicated, and
unmedicated births... it's all about the tolerance I guess you have for
pain?

I certainly didn't feel like I won something because I did it drug free,
but I did keep any drugs from her system which was what my intent was,
for that I was proud of myself for getting through it, no medal
involved, did it for the baby. No-one that feels they have hit their
limit should ever be made to feel like they lost something, because they
haven't. Natural is in the eye of the beholder I think, the baby came
from you, that's natural to me. Now on the other hand, I can't remember
the lady who had the toddler not too long ago but if that was my case,
I'd want every anesthetic known to man! Either way, you get the baby at
the end, you don't have long to go either :-)

Nic
EDD 23 Aug 04









Elizabeth H Bonesteel wrote:
No, nothing to do with baby. She's doing great.

I've wanted throughout this pregnancy to deliver naturally, no drugs. I do
understand that I might change my mind in the middle of it; and I know that
sometimes medical conditions present themselves that make more rigorous
interventions necessary. I trust my midwives, and if they tell me that my
baby needs to be induced or removed surgically, I won't hesitate. Like each
of us, what I want most out of all of this is a healthy child.

But, wow, I don't know ANYBODY who's given birth naturally. The most recent
births here at my office are one coworker whose wife had an unexpected c-
section, and a woman who was induced at 42 weeks. Every woman I've talked to
has had scheduled sections, or inductions with epidurals. And every situation
is different, and I don't know enough details about ANY of their stories to
even hazard a guess about what the reasons were.

Like I said, I don't know what's going to happen with us. We're doing what
we can - I'm working to urge her into a good birth position, I'm doing my
kegels, DH is reviewing all of our baby class materials. I've also got a
birth plan that covers contingencies such as potential cesarean. I know that
plans and realities often differ, and I think I'm prepared psychologically for
that possibility.

I just have NOBODY to talk to who's been able to do it the way I'd like to.
I got the old "You don't get a medal for suffering" line when I mentioned I
hadn't already requested an epidural. I don't want to "suffer," I just want
to have my baby safely, and as naturally as possible.

Sorry to rant. I guess I'm just feeling sort of isolated.

Liz
EDD 5/22/04

I know just how you feel.

I've just began researching on the net about natural child birth and what
you can do to help the bodies own pain killers help you. Try this website.
I haven't read any of the links yet but it looks promising...

http://bonni.net/birth/labor/index.html

Good luck
Camille



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removed surgically

Wow, I've never thought of my children as being "removed surgically" when
they were born - lol! Interesting way of looking at it.

But, wow, I don't know ANYBODY who's given birth naturally.

I wonder if it's cos everyone's definition of "natural" seems to be
different. To me it means spontaneous, vaginal, no epidural. My sister had
her first that way, and he was 9 lbs 6 :0 My friend had both her
children that way (the most recent only 2 weeks ago). And I know many
more who have done that too.

I can't say I'd really worry though about how everyone else gave birth.

Sophie
#4 due 7/7/04 - 4th "surgical removal" :P (and yes, I'm just kidding
before someone thinks I'm being mean or something).

Don't be discouraged, Liz. I am the only one within my group of friends that
had a natural birth. Went through 13 hours of labour and no drugs, no
epidural. I actully didn't even think about using epidural during the whole
process, I guess I just can't stand the thought of having a long needle poke
in through my spine. I also think it's nice to know that your baby is awake
and alert when he or she comes out.
All my friends had "surgically removed" their babies. Two of the went
through a 36 hour labour and then the doctors decided it was safer to just
have a c-section. Some of my friends had c-section for both their babies.
They just don't really like the idea of going through hours of labour. They
all have healthy babies, but the only set back about c-section is the
recovery time and breast feeding, since milk tends to come a lot slower.
One of my friends is having her second child (had c-section for her first),
she's due next week. Her babies are about 18 months apart and she said when
she started to show, she felt some pulling down at where she had her
c-section. I guess she's just scared that it might "burst" open, but the
chances of that happening is very slim nowadays because the way they "cut".
Don't worry too much about it because you won't know what's going to happen.
My baby was breached until a week before he was born, I thought I was going
to need a c-section. So just relax and enjoy the rest of your pregnancy!

Bessie


"Elizabeth H Bonesteel" wrote in message
...
No, nothing to do with baby. She's doing great.

I've wanted throughout this pregnancy to deliver naturally, no drugs. I
do
understand that I might change my mind in the middle of it; and I know
that
sometimes medical conditions present themselves that make more rigorous
interventions necessary. I trust my midwives, and if they tell me that my
baby needs to be induced or removed surgically, I won't hesitate. Like
each
of us, what I want most out of all of this is a healthy child.

But, wow, I don't know ANYBODY who's given birth naturally. The most
recent
births here at my office are one coworker whose wife had an unexpected c-
section, and a woman who was induced at 42 weeks. Every woman I've talked
to
has had scheduled sections, or inductions with epidurals. And every
situation
is different, and I don't know enough details about ANY of their stories
to
even hazard a guess about what the reasons were.

Like I said, I don't know what's going to happen with us. We're doing
what
we can - I'm working to urge her into a good birth position, I'm doing my
kegels, DH is reviewing all of our baby class materials. I've also got a
birth plan that covers contingencies such as potential cesarean. I know
that
plans and realities often differ, and I think I'm prepared psychologically
for
that possibility.

I just have NOBODY to talk to who's been able to do it the way I'd like
to.
I got the old "You don't get a medal for suffering" line when I mentioned
I
hadn't already requested an epidural. I don't want to "suffer," I just
want
to have my baby safely, and as naturally as possible.

Sorry to rant. I guess I'm just feeling sort of isolated.

Liz
EDD 5/22/04

--

"No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings. Man's reason and
spirit have often solved the seemingly unsolvable - and we believe
they
can do it again." -- John F. Kennedy, 6/10/1963

Elizabeth H Bonesteel wrote:

I just have NOBODY to talk to who's been able to do it the way I'd like to.
I got the old "You don't get a medal for suffering" line when I mentioned I
hadn't already requested an epidural. I don't want to "suffer," I just want
to have my baby safely, and as naturally as possible.

Sorry to rant. I guess I'm just feeling sort of isolated.

Hang tough. Just realize that the significant
majority of women don't even *attempt* or *want* to go
unmedicated, and of the rest, most don't have an effective
plan for doing so (not that that's all their fault in
many cases). It's not surprising that few women end
up going unmedicated. You are doing what you can to
prepare and you will do just fine. You will either
succeed at going unmedicated or you will determine that
doing something different is the right thing for you
at the time. It will all work out in the end.

Best wishes,
Ericka

Cam & Shane spake thusly
I know just how you feel.

I've just began researching on the net about natural child birth and what
you can do to help the bodies own pain killers help you. Try this website.
I haven't read any of the links yet but it looks promising...

http://bonni.net/birth/labor/index.html


Thanks for that - had a quick look at a few of them and hope I get a
chance to read more today.

Last night I was getting contractions about 5 minutes apart, for about
40 secs a time (yay for Contraction Timer! ). Went to bed and got
about 6 hours sleep and they seem to have gone now, but I guess things
might actually happen this weekend!
--
Maggie
EDD 28 April

In article ,
Nancy P wrote:

Have you been to a LaLecheLeague meeting? They welcome moms-to-be to come
to a meeting before giving birth to make connections, etc. Anyway,
practically everyone I had met there gave birth unmedicated.

I'll find out where they meet locally. Thanks. :-)

Meanwhile, my 2 best friends who have had children have done it unmedicated,
and each of their experiences are extremely different. I tried really hard
but medical complications made it impossible (in my opinion, of course).

Yours is the only opinion that matters, you know.

I feel like such a quitter.

:-( I'm sorry about that. IMHO, it shouldn't be a martyrdom thing - that's
part of why I'm trying to have well-developed contingency plans. Who knows
how I'll feel in the moment, or what will be necessary?

You took care of yourself and your baby. That's not quitting; that's being
smart.

Liz
EDD 5/22/04
--

"No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings. Man's reason and
spirit have often solved the seemingly unsolvable - and we believe they
can do it again." -- John F. Kennedy, 6/10/1963

In article ,
Nic H wrote:

[snip lots of good stuff]

Natural is in the eye of the beholder I think, the baby came
from you, that's natural to me.

That's a really, really good point, and one I will remember.

I think a lot of my desire has to do with listening to my mother's experience,
which was in the early 60s. She was quite unhappy with how it was handled
and how she was treated. That (even though I recognize things have changed a
bit in 40 years!), combined with an unhelpful early interaction with my
now-ex-OB, has made me incredibly wary of any medicalization of the process.
I try to learn what I can so I'll know what questions to ask if something
comes up - and when it makes sense to say NO.

Most of this is just my head filling up time between now and the baby's
arrival, I know. Sigh.

Liz
EDD 5/22/04
--

"No problem of human destiny is beyond human beings. Man's reason and
spirit have often solved the seemingly unsolvable - and we believe they
can do it again." -- John F. Kennedy, 6/10/1963