A Parenting & kids forum. ParentingBanter.com

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » ParentingBanter.com forum » alt.parenting » Spanking
Site Map Home Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

Spanking works....



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old October 25th 05, 05:08 PM
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....

.....and is claimed because the user doesn't know and try means of child
rearing.

What else could they say?

Hoever, there is no shortage of information on how to raise a child
without frightening them:

[[[ Interesting little flip-show on this page...something to think
about. ]]]

http://www.stopspanking.com/

  #2  
Old October 25th 05, 05:32 PM
Doan
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....



"Swedish parents now discipline their children; and in doing so, they rely
on a variety of alternatives to physical punishment. The method most
commonly used is _verbal_conflict_resolution_, which invites parents as
well as children to express their anger in words. Parents insist that
discussions involve constant eye contact, even if this means taking firm
hold of young children to engage their attention. Parents and
professionals agree that discussions may escalate into yelling, or that
yelling may be a necessary trigger for discussion. Still, many point out
that while yelling may be humiliating, it is better than ignoring the
problem or containing the anger, and it is usually less humiliating than
physical punishment."

It is better to yell at your kid - just call it "verbal conflict
resolution"! ;-)

Doan

On 25 Oct 2005 wrote:

....and is claimed because the user doesn't know and try means of child
rearing.

What else could they say?

Hoever, there is no shortage of information on how to raise a child
without frightening them:

[[[ Interesting little flip-show on this page...something to think
about. ]]]

http://www.stopspanking.com/



  #3  
Old October 25th 05, 05:56 PM
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....






Useful Links for understanding and using positive discipline methods.
NO punitive methods need be used at all.

No hitting, slapping, humiliating, screaming....just parenting gently.


Global Initiative logo
POSITIVE DISCIPLINE
Web resources for parents and teachers on discipline without corporal
punishment: N-W

Last modified: 28/2/04

A - C | E - M | N | P | R | S | U | W

National Association for Prevention of Child Abuse and Neglect
www.napcan.org.au
This Australian Association has produced a number of resources for
parents, available on the website, including:

o Children and discipline. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._families.html.
o Use words that help not hurt. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._children.html.
o 30 ways to boost a child's confidence. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._children.html.
o Alternatives to hitting children - or any other kind of
punishment. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._families.html.
o It's not OK to shake babies. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._families.html.


National Family and Parenting Institute
www.nfpi.org
The NFPI is an independent charity supporting parents in bringing up
children without using corporal punishment, promoting the wellbeing of
families, and campaigning for a more family friendly society. The
organisation conducts regular surveys on aspects of parenting and
family life in the UK, and runs e-parents (see above). Resources
include:

o Understanding discipline - A summary: An overview of child
discipline practices and their implications for family support -
summary of a 2001 report on the effectiveness of a variety of
disciplinary methods used in bringing up children, including physical
punishment. While not outrightly condemning smacking, it notes the
growing interest among parents for alternative ways of disciplining
children, and the evidence for links between physical punishment,
physical abuse, behaviour and emotional problems, and later mental
health problems, and for the ineffectiveness of physical punishment on
children's behaviour. It calls for national support for developing
parenting skills and a public awareness campaign to promote positive
parenting, where children learn through co-operation and rewards rather
than conflict and punishment. Available at
www.nfpi.org/data/publications/index.htm; full report (£10.00)
available by telephoning 00 44 207424 3460.
o The Millennial Family - 1999 MORI survey. Available at
http://www.nfpi.org/data/research/do...nialfamily.doc.
o Teenagers' Attitudes to Parenting: A survey of young
people's experiences of being parented, and their views on how to bring
up children - 2000 MORI survey. Available at
www.nfpi.org/data/research/docs/teenagers.doc.
o Listening to minority ethnic parents: their worries, their
solutions - 2001 MORI survey. Available at
www.nfpi.org/data/research/lis_min.htm.

National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children
www.nspcc.org.uk
A UK organisation campaigning for non-violent approaches to parenting.
In 2002, the NSPCC organised the UK's first ever large-scale public
education campaign entitled "Hitting children must stop. FULL STOP",
which included research into parents' views and experiences of corporal
punishment and publications promoting positive discipline. The NSPCC
also provides reports and resources for teachers and has produced
guidance for professionals on positive discipline - Encouraging
Positive Discipline, priced £1.50. Resources freely available on the
website include:

o Toddler Tips: for parents by parents - parents' tips for
dealing with toddler behaviour, with NSPCC commentary. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.
o Not Naughty but Normal - advice on bringing up toddlers
with a focus on how challenging behaviour is a normal expression of
their changing needs as they develop. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.
o Encouraging Better Behaviour: A practical guide to positive
parenting - launched in May 2002 as part of the nationwide campaign to
end corporal punishment of children in the home. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.
o Behave Yourself - a practical guide to encouraging better
behaviour in children. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.
o Listening to Children - how to communicate more effectively
with children. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.

Nationwide CAMPAIGN FOR A NON-VIOLENT Pedagogy
www.usp.br/ip/laboratories/lacri/nonviolent.htm
The SPANKING IS NON-EDUCATIONAL campaign in Brazil is based at the
Institute of Psychology Child Studies Laboratory (LACRI) at the
University of São Paulo and led by Dr Maria Amélia Azevedo and Dr
Viviane Nogueira de Azevedo Guerra. Its aims include fighting all
domestic violence against children, including corporal punishment, and
creating a non-violent pedagogy in family upbringing. The website
includes information on historical and empirical research, and an
ongoing study course covering research, legal reform, and educational
awareness.

The Natural Child Project
www.naturalchild.org
The Natural Child Project ("all children behave as well as they are
treated") contains many resources to support parents who choose
attachment parenting and non-punitive ways to bring up children. It
includes articles by Jan Hunt and others, and distributes a monthly
e-newsletter. Articles are available in English and Portuguese.
Articles include:

o Sociopathic Parenting. Available at
http://www.naturalchild.org/james_ki...parenting.html.
o Tough Love. Available at
www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/tough_love.html.
o The Influence of Corporal Punishment on Crime. Available at
http://www.naturalchild.org/research...unishment.html.
o Canadian Study Links Spanking to Psychiatric Disorders.
Available at
http://www.naturalchild.org/research...ing_study.html.
o The Relationships Between Feelings and Behaviour. Available
at www.naturalchild.org/sidney_craig/feelings.html.
o The Feelings of Children. Available at
www.naturalchild.org/guest/virginia_coigney.html.
o Hidden Messages. Available at
www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/hidden.html.
o The Fear of Being Permissive. Available at
http://www.naturalchild.org/sidney_c...ermissive.html.

Natural Parenting UK
www.natural-parenting.com
Parental discipline which has no place for hitting children is an
important aspect of the alternative parenting promoted by this website.
Articles include:

o Ten recommendations for wise parenting. Available at
www.natural-parenting.com/tenrec.html.
o Hidden messages: What our words and actions are really
telling our children. Available at www.natural-parenting.com/cas.html.

New South Wales Centre for Parenting and Research
www.parenting.nsw.gov.au
This website provides a number of useful articles on disciplining
without using physical punishment, including:

o Positive discipline. Available at
http://www.parenting.nsw.gov.au/publ...al.aspx?id=131.
o Discipline: where do I start? Available at
http://www.parenting.nsw.gov.au/publ...al.aspx?id=131.
o Discipline for toddlers: getting a handle on toddler
behaviour. Available at
http://www.parenting.nsw.gov.au/publ...al.aspx?id=131.
o You can't make me! Developing responsibility (in
teenagers). Available at
http://www.parenting.nsw.gov.au/publ...al.aspx?id=131.

New South Wales Commission for Children and Young People
www.kids.nsw.gov.au
Information sheets available for parents include:

o Listening to children. Available at
www.kids.nsw.gov.au/info.
o Raising children. Available at www.kids.nsw.gov.au/info.

Northwest Regional Educational Laboratory
www.nwrel.org
As part of its School Improvement Research series, this US Laboratory
has produced a research perspective on improving school and classroom
discipline:

o Schoolwide and classroom discipline. Reports on research
findings identifying effective classroom- and school-level disciplinary
practices, and recommends that corporal punishment be avoided.
Available at www.nwrel.org/scpd/sirs/5/cu9.html.

The No Spanking Page
www.neverhitachild.org
A list of links to positive non-punitive childrearing pages and
references, with an introductory article by Murray A. Straus "Hitting a
child is wrong and a child never, ever, under any circumstances should
be hit".

Parenting of Adolescents
http://parentingteens.about.com
This website provides a range of advice from parent Denise Witmer on
positive discipline methods and articles on effective communication
styles, aimed at parents of teenagers. Articles include:

o What is discipline? Available at
http://parentingteens.about.com/cs/d...scipline_p.htm.
o The myth of the "bad kid". Available at
http://parentingteens.about.com/cs/d...behavior_p.htm.

Parenting without Punishing
www.nopunish.net
The website of Norm Lee, an active campaigner against corporal
punishment. He has developed an approach to parenting which he calls
the New Non-Punitive Parenting Paradigm (NN-PPP), based on the
principles of respect for children as thinking and feeling human beings
with full membership in the family and on Democratic Discipline.
Resources include:

o What can an observer do to stop the hitting? Available at
www.nopunish.net/interven.htm.
o Parenting without Punishing - book by Norm Lee outlining
the New Non-Punitive Parenting Paradigm and Democratic Discipline.
Available at www.nopunish.net/PWP.pdf.

The Parent Training Center
www.parenttrainingcenter.com
A parent training organisation dedicated to the promotion of positive
discipline. Provides training for parents (including single parents),
teachers and childcare workers, and offers free web-based previews of
the training sessions.

PositiveDiscipline.com
www.positivediscipline.com
Jane Nelson is a speaker and writer on bringing up children without
using corporal punishment. This website contains resources for teachers
and parents based on her work, including:

o What is positive discipline? Available at
http://www.positivediscipline.com/Wh...PD_Article.pdf.
o Positive discipline guidelines. Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles/index.html.
o 18 ways to avoid power struggles. Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles/index.html.
o How do you motivate a teen? Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles/index.html.
o Positive time out. Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles_teacher/.
o No more logical consequences. Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles_teacher/.
o Planting seeds of change through positive discipline.
Available at http://www.positivediscipline.com/ar.../planting.html.
o The spinoffs of positive discipline. Available at
http://www.positivediscipline.com/ar.../spinoffs.html.

Positive Discipline Resource Center
http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positiv...nter/id14.html
A Christian-based website with materials dealing with children's
behaviour without using corporal punishment. It includes a useful
section on recommended books and a number of articles, including:

o Proactive and responsive discipline. Available at
http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positiv...nter/id14.html.
o A study of "The Rod" scriptures: do Christians have to
spank? Available at
http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positiv...nter/id14.html.


Positive Parenting On-line
www.positiveparenting.com
This USA based website includes tips and articles on alternatives to
corporal punishment for parents, teachers and other caregivers of
children from toddlers to teenagers. Also a regular newsletter.
Articles include:

o Bedtime Without Struggling. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_012.html.
o 9 Things to do Instead of Spanking. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_002.html.
o Deciding to Spare the Rod. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_013.html.
o Ten Keys to Successful Parenting. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_001.html.
o Dealing with Power Struggles. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_003.html.

Project NoSpank
www.nospank.net
This is the website of Parents and Teachers Against Violence in
Education, run by Jordan Riak in the USA. Contains articles on all
aspects of corporal punishment of children, with many documents
available in English, French and Spanish. Also host Christians for
Non-Violent Parenting (see above). Resources include:

o Spanking teaches wrong lessons. Available at
www.nospank.net/resnick.htm.
o How children really react to control. Available at
www.nospank.net/gordon2.htm.
o Shame steps out of hiding and into sharper focus. Available
at www.nospank.net/goleman3.htm.
o Spanking as sexualised abuse. Available at
www.nospank.net/donahue.htm.
o Time to stop eleventh hour parenting. Available at
www.nospank.net/whthrst.htm.
o Effects of spanking - a brief summary. Available at
www.nospank.net/killen.htm.
o Mistaken approaches to night waking. Available at
www.nospank.net/fleiss.htm.
o The men they will become. Available at
www.nospank.net/nberger2.htm.
o An alternative to spanking? Available at
www.nospank.net/altcp.htm.
o A Christian perspective on corporal punishment. Available
at www.nospank.net/popcak.htm.

Raising Kids
www.raisingkids.co.uk
This UK-based website promotes non-punitive ways of disciplining
children and includes advice from experts and tips from parents. Much
of the advice is organised around age-related issues, and discussion of
how to manage behaviour always includes the advice never to smack the
child. Articles include:

o Tantrum Taming Tips. Available at
www.raisingkids.co.uk/1_4/tod_emo02.asp.
o 1-4 Yrs: Bully Or Attention-Seeker? Available at
www.raisingkids.co.uk/1_4/tod?hr06.asp.

Save the Children UK
www.savethechildren.org.uk
Save the Children is the UK's leading international children's charity
and produces a number of publications for parents and other childcarers
about non-violent ways of managing children's behaviour. Resources
include:

o We Can Work It Out: Parenting With Confidence - a booklet
promoting positive discipline based on good communication and the
rights of children to express themselves, learn and develop, while
parents also have the right to set limits on acceptable behaviour. The
booklet outlines the principles of positive discipline, and includes
examples of how to handle typical situations such as keeping babies
safe from harm, teaching toddlers not to hurt each other, dealing with
tantrums, and stopping siblings arguing with each other. It contains
information on further resources, including books for children, and
useful addresses. Available at
http://www.savethechildren.org.uk/on...out/index.html. Also
available as a training pack for parent groups and those who work with
parents (£12.50) from .
o An Eye for an Eye Leaves Everyone Blind - a training pack
and parents' guide produced together with the National Early Years
Network to help children develop non-violent ways of resolving
disputes. Available (£10.00) from
.
o Let's Work Together: Managing children's behaviour - a
training pack for those who work with other people's children
explaining how to control challenging behaviour and reinforce positive
behaviour without resorting to corporal punishment. Available (£12.50)
from
.

UNICEF
www.unicef.org
Online guidance on child protection has been developed by UNICEF, which
includes the development of proper classroom discipline, and other
useful resources:

o Child protection: discipline and violence. Available at
www.unicef.org/teachers/protection/violence.htm.
o Co-operative learning. Available at
www.unicef.org/teachers/teacher/co-op.htm.
o Beliefs about a constructive learning environment.
Available at www.unicef.org/teachers/learner/beliefs.htm.
o Interpersonal skills for learning. Available at
www.unicef.org/teachers/learner/p_skills.htm.

The Whole Family Attachment Parenting Association
http://members.tripod.com/~JudyArnall/index.html
Canadian website with information about attachment parenting, based on
positive non-violent discipline, and links to other relevant sites.
Please contact us if you have, or know of, materials available
electronically:

  #4  
Old October 25th 05, 06:18 PM
Doan
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....



Maybe they should let the Swedish parents know about this. ;-)

"Swedish parents now discipline their children; and in doing so, they rely
on a variety of alternatives to physical punishment. The method most
commonly used is _verbal_conflict_resolution_, which invites parents as
well as children to express their anger in words. Parents insist that
discussions involve constant eye contact, even if this means taking firm
hold of young children to engage their attention. Parents and
professionals agree that discussions may escalate into yelling, or that
yelling may be a necessary trigger for discussion. Still, many point out
that while yelling may be humiliating, it is better than ignoring the
problem or containing the anger, and it is usually less humiliating than
physical punishment."

It is better to yell at your kid - just call it "verbal conflict
resolution"! ;-)

Doan


On 25 Oct 2005 wrote:






Useful Links for understanding and using positive discipline methods.
NO punitive methods need be used at all.

No hitting, slapping, humiliating, screaming....just parenting gently.


Global Initiative logo
POSITIVE DISCIPLINE
Web resources for parents and teachers on discipline without corporal
punishment: N-W

Last modified: 28/2/04

A - C | E - M | N | P | R | S | U | W

National Association for Prevention of Child Abuse and Neglect
www.napcan.org.au
This Australian Association has produced a number of resources for
parents, available on the website, including:

o Children and discipline. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._families.html.
o Use words that help not hurt. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._children.html.
o 30 ways to boost a child's confidence. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._children.html.
o Alternatives to hitting children - or any other kind of
punishment. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._families.html.
o It's not OK to shake babies. Available at
http://www.napcan.org.au/Information..._families.html.


National Family and Parenting Institute
www.nfpi.org
The NFPI is an independent charity supporting parents in bringing up
children without using corporal punishment, promoting the wellbeing of
families, and campaigning for a more family friendly society. The
organisation conducts regular surveys on aspects of parenting and
family life in the UK, and runs e-parents (see above). Resources
include:

o Understanding discipline - A summary: An overview of child
discipline practices and their implications for family support -
summary of a 2001 report on the effectiveness of a variety of
disciplinary methods used in bringing up children, including physical
punishment. While not outrightly condemning smacking, it notes the
growing interest among parents for alternative ways of disciplining
children, and the evidence for links between physical punishment,
physical abuse, behaviour and emotional problems, and later mental
health problems, and for the ineffectiveness of physical punishment on
children's behaviour. It calls for national support for developing
parenting skills and a public awareness campaign to promote positive
parenting, where children learn through co-operation and rewards rather
than conflict and punishment. Available at
www.nfpi.org/data/publications/index.htm; full report (£10.00)
available by telephoning 00 44 207424 3460.
o The Millennial Family - 1999 MORI survey. Available at
http://www.nfpi.org/data/research/do...nialfamily.doc.
o Teenagers' Attitudes to Parenting: A survey of young
people's experiences of being parented, and their views on how to bring
up children - 2000 MORI survey. Available at
www.nfpi.org/data/research/docs/teenagers.doc.
o Listening to minority ethnic parents: their worries, their
solutions - 2001 MORI survey. Available at
www.nfpi.org/data/research/lis_min.htm.

National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children
www.nspcc.org.uk
A UK organisation campaigning for non-violent approaches to parenting.
In 2002, the NSPCC organised the UK's first ever large-scale public
education campaign entitled "Hitting children must stop. FULL STOP",
which included research into parents' views and experiences of corporal
punishment and publications promoting positive discipline. The NSPCC
also provides reports and resources for teachers and has produced
guidance for professionals on positive discipline - Encouraging
Positive Discipline, priced £1.50. Resources freely available on the
website include:

o Toddler Tips: for parents by parents - parents' tips for
dealing with toddler behaviour, with NSPCC commentary. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.
o Not Naughty but Normal - advice on bringing up toddlers
with a focus on how challenging behaviour is a normal expression of
their changing needs as they develop. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.
o Encouraging Better Behaviour: A practical guide to positive
parenting - launched in May 2002 as part of the nationwide campaign to
end corporal punishment of children in the home. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.
o Behave Yourself - a practical guide to encouraging better
behaviour in children. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.
o Listening to Children - how to communicate more effectively
with children. Available at
http://www.nspcc.org.uk/html/Home/In...entscarers.htm.

Nationwide CAMPAIGN FOR A NON-VIOLENT Pedagogy
www.usp.br/ip/laboratories/lacri/nonviolent.htm
The SPANKING IS NON-EDUCATIONAL campaign in Brazil is based at the
Institute of Psychology Child Studies Laboratory (LACRI) at the
University of São Paulo and led by Dr Maria Amélia Azevedo and Dr
Viviane Nogueira de Azevedo Guerra. Its aims include fighting all
domestic violence against children, including corporal punishment, and
creating a non-violent pedagogy in family upbringing. The website
includes information on historical and empirical research, and an
ongoing study course covering research, legal reform, and educational
awareness.

The Natural Child Project
www.naturalchild.org
The Natural Child Project ("all children behave as well as they are
treated") contains many resources to support parents who choose
attachment parenting and non-punitive ways to bring up children. It
includes articles by Jan Hunt and others, and distributes a monthly
e-newsletter. Articles are available in English and Portuguese.
Articles include:

o Sociopathic Parenting. Available at
http://www.naturalchild.org/james_ki...parenting.html.
o Tough Love. Available at
www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/tough_love.html.
o The Influence of Corporal Punishment on Crime. Available at
http://www.naturalchild.org/research...unishment.html.
o Canadian Study Links Spanking to Psychiatric Disorders.
Available at
http://www.naturalchild.org/research...ing_study.html.
o The Relationships Between Feelings and Behaviour. Available
at www.naturalchild.org/sidney_craig/feelings.html.
o The Feelings of Children. Available at
www.naturalchild.org/guest/virginia_coigney.html.
o Hidden Messages. Available at
www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/hidden.html.
o The Fear of Being Permissive. Available at
http://www.naturalchild.org/sidney_c...ermissive.html.

Natural Parenting UK
www.natural-parenting.com
Parental discipline which has no place for hitting children is an
important aspect of the alternative parenting promoted by this website.
Articles include:

o Ten recommendations for wise parenting. Available at
www.natural-parenting.com/tenrec.html.
o Hidden messages: What our words and actions are really
telling our children. Available at www.natural-parenting.com/cas.html.

New South Wales Centre for Parenting and Research
www.parenting.nsw.gov.au
This website provides a number of useful articles on disciplining
without using physical punishment, including:

o Positive discipline. Available at
http://www.parenting.nsw.gov.au/publ...al.aspx?id=131.
o Discipline: where do I start? Available at
http://www.parenting.nsw.gov.au/publ...al.aspx?id=131.
o Discipline for toddlers: getting a handle on toddler
behaviour. Available at
http://www.parenting.nsw.gov.au/publ...al.aspx?id=131.
o You can't make me! Developing responsibility (in
teenagers). Available at
http://www.parenting.nsw.gov.au/publ...al.aspx?id=131.

New South Wales Commission for Children and Young People
www.kids.nsw.gov.au
Information sheets available for parents include:

o Listening to children. Available at
www.kids.nsw.gov.au/info.
o Raising children. Available at www.kids.nsw.gov.au/info.

Northwest Regional Educational Laboratory
www.nwrel.org
As part of its School Improvement Research series, this US Laboratory
has produced a research perspective on improving school and classroom
discipline:

o Schoolwide and classroom discipline. Reports on research
findings identifying effective classroom- and school-level disciplinary
practices, and recommends that corporal punishment be avoided.
Available at www.nwrel.org/scpd/sirs/5/cu9.html.

The No Spanking Page
www.neverhitachild.org
A list of links to positive non-punitive childrearing pages and
references, with an introductory article by Murray A. Straus "Hitting a
child is wrong and a child never, ever, under any circumstances should
be hit".

Parenting of Adolescents
http://parentingteens.about.com
This website provides a range of advice from parent Denise Witmer on
positive discipline methods and articles on effective communication
styles, aimed at parents of teenagers. Articles include:

o What is discipline? Available at
http://parentingteens.about.com/cs/d...scipline_p.htm.
o The myth of the "bad kid". Available at
http://parentingteens.about.com/cs/d...behavior_p.htm.

Parenting without Punishing
www.nopunish.net
The website of Norm Lee, an active campaigner against corporal
punishment. He has developed an approach to parenting which he calls
the New Non-Punitive Parenting Paradigm (NN-PPP), based on the
principles of respect for children as thinking and feeling human beings
with full membership in the family and on Democratic Discipline.
Resources include:

o What can an observer do to stop the hitting? Available at
www.nopunish.net/interven.htm.
o Parenting without Punishing - book by Norm Lee outlining
the New Non-Punitive Parenting Paradigm and Democratic Discipline.
Available at www.nopunish.net/PWP.pdf.

The Parent Training Center
www.parenttrainingcenter.com
A parent training organisation dedicated to the promotion of positive
discipline. Provides training for parents (including single parents),
teachers and childcare workers, and offers free web-based previews of
the training sessions.

PositiveDiscipline.com
www.positivediscipline.com
Jane Nelson is a speaker and writer on bringing up children without
using corporal punishment. This website contains resources for teachers
and parents based on her work, including:

o What is positive discipline? Available at
http://www.positivediscipline.com/Wh...PD_Article.pdf.
o Positive discipline guidelines. Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles/index.html.
o 18 ways to avoid power struggles. Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles/index.html.
o How do you motivate a teen? Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles/index.html.
o Positive time out. Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles_teacher/.
o No more logical consequences. Available at
www.positivediscipline.com/articles_teacher/.
o Planting seeds of change through positive discipline.
Available at http://www.positivediscipline.com/ar.../planting.html.
o The spinoffs of positive discipline. Available at
http://www.positivediscipline.com/ar.../spinoffs.html.

Positive Discipline Resource Center
http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positiv...nter/id14.html
A Christian-based website with materials dealing with children's
behaviour without using corporal punishment. It includes a useful
section on recommended books and a number of articles, including:

o Proactive and responsive discipline. Available at
http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positiv...nter/id14.html.
o A study of "The Rod" scriptures: do Christians have to
spank? Available at
http://joanneaz_2.tripod.com/positiv...nter/id14.html.


Positive Parenting On-line
www.positiveparenting.com
This USA based website includes tips and articles on alternatives to
corporal punishment for parents, teachers and other caregivers of
children from toddlers to teenagers. Also a regular newsletter.
Articles include:

o Bedtime Without Struggling. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_012.html.
o 9 Things to do Instead of Spanking. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_002.html.
o Deciding to Spare the Rod. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_013.html.
o Ten Keys to Successful Parenting. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_001.html.
o Dealing with Power Struggles. Available at
http://www.positiveparenting.com/res...ticle_003.html.

Project NoSpank
www.nospank.net
This is the website of Parents and Teachers Against Violence in
Education, run by Jordan Riak in the USA. Contains articles on all
aspects of corporal punishment of children, with many documents
available in English, French and Spanish. Also host Christians for
Non-Violent Parenting (see above). Resources include:

o Spanking teaches wrong lessons. Available at
www.nospank.net/resnick.htm.
o How children really react to control. Available at
www.nospank.net/gordon2.htm.
o Shame steps out of hiding and into sharper focus. Available
at www.nospank.net/goleman3.htm.
o Spanking as sexualised abuse. Available at
www.nospank.net/donahue.htm.
o Time to stop eleventh hour parenting. Available at
www.nospank.net/whthrst.htm.
o Effects of spanking - a brief summary. Available at
www.nospank.net/killen.htm.
o Mistaken approaches to night waking. Available at
www.nospank.net/fleiss.htm.
o The men they will become. Available at
www.nospank.net/nberger2.htm.
o An alternative to spanking? Available at
www.nospank.net/altcp.htm.
o A Christian perspective on corporal punishment. Available
at www.nospank.net/popcak.htm.

Raising Kids
www.raisingkids.co.uk
This UK-based website promotes non-punitive ways of disciplining
children and includes advice from experts and tips from parents. Much
of the advice is organised around age-related issues, and discussion of
how to manage behaviour always includes the advice never to smack the
child. Articles include:

o Tantrum Taming Tips. Available at
www.raisingkids.co.uk/1_4/tod_emo02.asp.
o 1-4 Yrs: Bully Or Attention-Seeker? Available at
www.raisingkids.co.uk/1_4/tod?hr06.asp.

Save the Children UK
www.savethechildren.org.uk
Save the Children is the UK's leading international children's charity
and produces a number of publications for parents and other childcarers
about non-violent ways of managing children's behaviour. Resources
include:

o We Can Work It Out: Parenting With Confidence - a booklet
promoting positive discipline based on good communication and the
rights of children to express themselves, learn and develop, while
parents also have the right to set limits on acceptable behaviour. The
booklet outlines the principles of positive discipline, and includes
examples of how to handle typical situations such as keeping babies
safe from harm, teaching toddlers not to hurt each other, dealing with
tantrums, and stopping siblings arguing with each other. It contains
information on further resources, including books for children, and
useful addresses. Available at
http://www.savethechildren.org.uk/on...out/index.html. Also
available as a training pack for parent groups and those who work with
parents (£12.50) from .
o An Eye for an Eye Leaves Everyone Blind - a training pack
and parents' guide produced together with the National Early Years
Network to help children develop non-violent ways of resolving
disputes. Available (£10.00) from
.
o Let's Work Together: Managing children's behaviour - a
training pack for those who work with other people's children
explaining how to control challenging behaviour and reinforce positive
behaviour without resorting to corporal punishment. Available (£12.50)
from
.

UNICEF
www.unicef.org
Online guidance on child protection has been developed by UNICEF, which
includes the development of proper classroom discipline, and other
useful resources:

o Child protection: discipline and violence. Available at
www.unicef.org/teachers/protection/violence.htm.
o Co-operative learning. Available at
www.unicef.org/teachers/teacher/co-op.htm.
o Beliefs about a constructive learning environment.
Available at www.unicef.org/teachers/learner/beliefs.htm.
o Interpersonal skills for learning. Available at
www.unicef.org/teachers/learner/p_skills.htm.

The Whole Family Attachment Parenting Association
http://members.tripod.com/~JudyArnall/index.html
Canadian website with information about attachment parenting, based on
positive non-violent discipline, and links to other relevant sites.
Please contact us if you have, or know of, materials available
electronically:



  #5  
Old October 25th 05, 06:31 PM
Opinions
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....


Doan wrote:
It is better to yell at your kid - just call it "verbal conflict
resolution"! ;-)


Better children through yelling. That is quite a national slogan born
of frostbite on the brain.

It really is going to be interesting to see how Sweden disengages
itself from yet another venture into eugenics. Only a few decades ago,
in its efforts to produce its own version of the master race, Sweden
was a hotbed of forced sterilization. Now, it is better children
through the grand social experiment of psychological smashmouth.

  #6  
Old October 25th 05, 11:20 PM
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....


Opinions wrote:
Doan wrote:
It is better to yell at your kid - just call it "verbal conflict
resolution"! ;-)


Better children through yelling. That is quite a national slogan born
of frostbite on the brain.


So who recommends yelling?

It really is going to be interesting to see how Sweden disengages
itself from yet another venture into eugenics.


How is not hitting children an eugenics program?

Only a few decades ago,
in its efforts to produce its own version of the master race, Sweden
was a hotbed of forced sterilization.


http://www.cnn.com/HEALTH/9901/26/sweden.sterilization/

That's 20 year old news, Opinions. You remind me a bit of "Observer."
Any relation?

Yes, it was a shocking revelation that a nation would resort to such
things. It was not the first, and likely not the last in a world where
beating children is considered a form of teaching.

And of course the official end of such a practice as forced
sterilization a great relief and indication of the real spirit of
Sweden's government and people that they ended this in the 70's with
full admission of their guilt and error, and made what redress they
could.

Interestingly though, in the late 90's, as you'll see if you read the
article linked above, 80% remained happy with THEIR OWN DECISION. In
other words only a tiny minority were coerced. The rest willingly
signed agreements to be sterilized.

" ... The commission noted that 5 to 10 years after their operations,
nearly 80 percent of those sterilized said they were happy with their
condition and did not regret it. ... "

How long do you wish to hold a people to blame when they have
rehabilitated? And how does their turnaround on eugenics sterilization
in fact relate to the spanking issue? (The US had exactly the same
thing from time to time in various states.)

In fact outlawing CP in Sweden represented a turnaround from one of the
most harsh and punitive of parenting methods in Europe...possibly the
world. They beat their children as thoroughly as Germans once did.
Harshly, and sometimes to death. We turned around OUR eugenics
practices. Possibly the next step is an end to CP, by legal sanctions
against it. Some states are already moving firmly in that direction.

Now, it is better children
through the grand social experiment of psychological smashmouth.


Well, I'd venture you do not understand the statement made. It didn't
say yelling was as GOOD as, or suggest it over NON-punitive methods,
just that it was better than BEATING ONE'S CHILDREN.

I read in it a clear message that it wasn't much better.

You failed to see that I take it?

Let me parse the statement for you, and see if in fact it said what you
appear to insinuate...that yelling is a good choice, and now
universally the parenting method of Swedish parents:

" Swedish parents now discipline their children; and in doing so, they
rely
on a variety of alternatives to physical punishment. ...

[[[ Oh, "a variety." Do you surmise it to all be "yelling" based? ]]]

.... The method most
commonly used is _verbal_conflict_resolution_, which invites parents as
well as children to express their anger in words. ...

[[[ Note, this is ONLY on the subject of "anger." Parents, we presume,
in Sweden as here and elsewhere in the world do a lot of interacting
with their children to teach them that contain no anger at all. Fancy
that. ]]]

.... Parents insist that
discussions involve constant eye contact, even if this means taking
firm
hold of young children to engage their attention. ...

[[[ Personally I don't care for such things, but occasionally a child
has been so previously poorly parented that this may well be
non-punitivly done. ]]]

.... Parents and professionals agree that discussions may escalate into
yelling, or that yelling may be a necessary trigger for discussion. ...

[[[ Notice that it's "may" "escalate," inviting you, the reader to
consider that it may also not so escalate. More often than not it does
no. And yelling was very likely a part of CP style parenting as well.
]]]

.... Still, many point out that while yelling may be humiliating, it is
better than ignoring the problem or containing the anger, and it is
usually less humiliating than physical punishment."

The question there would be who is saying what. Do the people that
'point out' the humiliation factor, also point out that it is less
humiliating than physical punishment, or as I read the comma placement,
do the AUTHORS make that statement to make clear that it's less
humiliating?

All in all, it's clear to me this is no pean to screaming dancing
monkey parenting methods.

I have been particularly amused by the claim that child abuse in fact
when UP in Sweden immediately after the law came into effect. No, what
happened was that what was previously acceptable child discipline ...
including leaving injuries now was seen as abuse. As of course it is.
The risks to the child's health and life are considerable.

So of course, as in all OTHER new laws criminalizing a previously
acceptable behavior, like raping one's wife, or working children for
exploitation, the cases seen in court are going to increase. People
don't stop a behavior the instant a law is passed.

The claim, of course, by the advocates and apologists for spanking is
that Swedish parents were being prosecuted for "spanking." Examination
of the cases shows they were prosecuted for doing what they used to
with immunity....beating and injuring. Child abuse laws, though they
existed were NOT being enforced because of a national culture of
violence against children.

The law worked.

Currently THIS is the kind of garbage that passes for "righteous"
discipline. An insistence on doing injury to the child otherwise the
discipline might not be effective:

http://www.geocities.com/eingedi.geo/the-belt.html

And consider, if parents, as I've cited in another post, up to 45% or
so, and grandparents up to 60% do NOT understand normal developmental
limitations of children, how the people at the site above will NOT use
spanking even according to their OWN standards.

I love that piece, "deliberately disobey." Good old "willful
disobedience" and applied to children under 6, who cannot possibly
grasp cause and effect reasoning.

Kane

  #8  
Old October 29th 05, 05:10 AM
DEBORAH
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....

Yelling at a child is one thing but sometimes a few swats on the bare
bottom gets the message acrossed.

  #9  
Old October 29th 05, 11:09 AM
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....


DEBORAH wrote:
Yelling at a child is one thing but sometimes a few swats on the bare
bottom gets the message acrossed.


What "one thing" is yelling?

What message do a few swats get "acrossed?" [sic]

Thanks, Kane

  #10  
Old October 29th 05, 08:31 PM
Doan
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default Spanking works....

On 28 Oct 2005, DEBORAH wrote:

Yelling at a child is one thing but sometimes a few swats on the bare
bottom gets the message acrossed.

But anti-spanking zealotS recommend yelling over spanking.

"Swedish parents now discipline their children; and in doing so, they rely
on a variety of alternatives to physical punishment. The method most
commonly used is _verbal_conflict_resolution_, which invites parents as
well as children to express their anger in words. Parents insist that
discussions involve constant eye contact, even if this means taking firm
hold of young children to engage their attention. Parents and
professionals agree that discussions may escalate into yelling, or that
yelling may be a necessary trigger for discussion. Still, many point out
that while yelling may be humiliating, it is better than ignoring the
problem or containing the anger, and it is usually less humiliating than
physical punishment."

It is better to yell at your kid - just call it "verbal conflict
resolution"! ;-)

Doan

 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
| | Kids should work... Kane General 13 December 10th 03 03:30 AM
| | Kids should work... Kane Spanking 12 December 10th 03 03:30 AM
| | Kids should work... Kane Foster Parents 3 December 9th 03 12:53 AM
Kids should work. LaVonne Carlson General 22 December 7th 03 05:27 AM
Kids should work. ChrisScaife Foster Parents 16 December 7th 03 05:27 AM


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 12:49 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2004-2024 ParentingBanter.com.
The comments are property of their posters.