Missing gifts from party?

Okay, so the party was a huge success. We brought the gifts home to open,
becuase it was at a venue and the logistics were too much for us to open
the gifts there. There were only 7 minutes left after the cake and pizza.

DS started writing thank you notes today. One problem arose. At the
venue, the guests dropped off the presents on a cart at the door. There
are two parties going on at the same time in different rooms. There was
some confusion for the guests, as we had a couple of guests from the other
party come to our party. We did not get a present from one of our guests.
I do not know if he did not bring one or if it landed on the wrong cart. I
don't want the mom to feel put on the spot if I went out and just asked her
if she brought one, but I don't want her to feel we were ungrateful for a
gift, if her son brought one and we don't send a thank you. My brother
also came and he always brings a gift, but we don't have one from him,
either.

What to do?

What to do?

Can you call the place the party was at and ask if any gifts were handed
in, perhaps, with the right words, you could have them check with the
other party if they took any extra away.

Cheers

Anne

toypup wrote:

Okay, so the party was a huge success. We brought the gifts home to open,
becuase it was at a venue and the logistics were too much for us to open
the gifts there. There were only 7 minutes left after the cake and pizza.

DS started writing thank you notes today. One problem arose. At the
venue, the guests dropped off the presents on a cart at the door. There
are two parties going on at the same time in different rooms. There was
some confusion for the guests, as we had a couple of guests from the other
party come to our party. We did not get a present from one of our guests.
I do not know if he did not bring one or if it landed on the wrong cart. I
don't want the mom to feel put on the spot if I went out and just asked her
if she brought one, but I don't want her to feel we were ungrateful for a
gift, if her son brought one and we don't send a thank you. My brother
also came and he always brings a gift, but we don't have one from him,
either.

What to do?

The first thing to do is ask your brother - since he is family, he
shouldn't mind that. Although you might put it tactfully - suggest
that you thought he might be tapering off on gifts to nephews now that
they are bigger but that you didn't want your son to miss out on
thanking him if he did bring one.

If you brother did bring one, then you can go to the venue and ask
them.

Then if there isn't any resolution, I would have your son write the
other child and thank them for coming to the party, without mentioning
the gift.

On Sun, 17 Jun 2007 10:48:30 GMT, Rosalie B. wrote:

toypup wrote:

Okay, so the party was a huge success. We brought the gifts home to open,
becuase it was at a venue and the logistics were too much for us to open
the gifts there. There were only 7 minutes left after the cake and pizza.

DS started writing thank you notes today. One problem arose. At the
venue, the guests dropped off the presents on a cart at the door. There
are two parties going on at the same time in different rooms. There was
some confusion for the guests, as we had a couple of guests from the other
party come to our party. We did not get a present from one of our guests.
I do not know if he did not bring one or if it landed on the wrong cart. I
don't want the mom to feel put on the spot if I went out and just asked her
if she brought one, but I don't want her to feel we were ungrateful for a
gift, if her son brought one and we don't send a thank you. My brother
also came and he always brings a gift, but we don't have one from him,
either.

What to do?

The first thing to do is ask your brother - since he is family, he
shouldn't mind that. Although you might put it tactfully - suggest
that you thought he might be tapering off on gifts to nephews now that
they are bigger but that you didn't want your son to miss out on
thanking him if he did bring one.

If you brother did bring one, then you can go to the venue and ask
them.

Then if there isn't any resolution, I would have your son write the
other child and thank them for coming to the party, without mentioning
the gift.

Thanks. Those are good suggestions.

toypup wrote:
Okay, so the party was a huge success. We brought the gifts home to open,
becuase it was at a venue and the logistics were too much for us to open
the gifts there. There were only 7 minutes left after the cake and pizza.

DS started writing thank you notes today. One problem arose. At the
venue, the guests dropped off the presents on a cart at the door. There
are two parties going on at the same time in different rooms. There was
some confusion for the guests, as we had a couple of guests from the other
party come to our party. We did not get a present from one of our guests.
I do not know if he did not bring one or if it landed on the wrong cart. I
don't want the mom to feel put on the spot if I went out and just asked her
if she brought one, but I don't want her to feel we were ungrateful for a
gift, if her son brought one and we don't send a thank you. My brother
also came and he always brings a gift, but we don't have one from him,
either.

What to do?

I'd call the party venue, and politely ask them to contact the other
family and politely inquire if there were any extra gifts.

jeff

On Jun 17, 5:17 am, toypup wrote:
Okay, so the party was a huge success. We brought the gifts home to open,
becuase it was at a venue and the logistics were too much for us to open
the gifts there. There were only 7 minutes left after the cake and pizza.

DS started writing thank you notes today. One problem arose. At the
venue, the guests dropped off the presents on a cart at the door. There
are two parties going on at the same time in different rooms. There was
some confusion for the guests, as we had a couple of guests from the other
party come to our party. We did not get a present from one of our guests.
I do not know if he did not bring one or if it landed on the wrong cart. I
don't want the mom to feel put on the spot if I went out and just asked her
if she brought one, but I don't want her to feel we were ungrateful for a
gift, if her son brought one and we don't send a thank you. My brother
also came and he always brings a gift, but we don't have one from him,
either.

What to do?

I would just be honest, admit that you are embarassed to ask and that
you are doing so only to ensure you send thank you cards. The parents
will understand that things got a bit muddled at the venue. It is an
uncomfortable situation, but once you've done it, it won't seem so
bad.

Mary Ann

On Jun 17, 12:13 pm, Jeff wrote:
toypup wrote:
Okay, so the party was a huge success. We brought the gifts home to open,
becuase it was at a venue and the logistics were too much for us to open
the gifts there. There were only 7 minutes left after the cake and pizza.

DS started writing thank you notes today. One problem arose. At the
venue, the guests dropped off the presents on a cart at the door. There
are two parties going on at the same time in different rooms. There was
some confusion for the guests, as we had a couple of guests from the other
party come to our party. We did not get a present from one of our guests.
I do not know if he did not bring one or if it landed on the wrong cart. I
don't want the mom to feel put on the spot if I went out and just asked her
if she brought one, but I don't want her to feel we were ungrateful for a
gift, if her son brought one and we don't send a thank you. My brother
also came and he always brings a gift, but we don't have one from him,
either.

What to do?

I'd call the party venue, and politely ask them to contact the other
family and politely inquire if there were any extra gifts.

Indeed.

If not, you have two options, as I see it:

(i) Have your son write an ambiguous thank you note, thanking the
child for attending the party.

(ii) Lie through your teeth. ;- Call the family and tell them that
you ran out to the bathroom while your son was opening the
presents,and in just those few moments, things managed to go awry, and
you're having trouble sorting who gave what for thank you notes.

Barbara

Barbara wrote:
On Jun 17, 12:13 pm, Jeff wrote:
toypup wrote:
Okay, so the party was a huge success. We brought the gifts home to open,
becuase it was at a venue and the logistics were too much for us to open
the gifts there. There were only 7 minutes left after the cake and pizza.
DS started writing thank you notes today. One problem arose. At the
venue, the guests dropped off the presents on a cart at the door. There
are two parties going on at the same time in different rooms. There was
some confusion for the guests, as we had a couple of guests from the other
party come to our party. We did not get a present from one of our guests.
I do not know if he did not bring one or if it landed on the wrong cart. I
don't want the mom to feel put on the spot if I went out and just asked her
if she brought one, but I don't want her to feel we were ungrateful for a
gift, if her son brought one and we don't send a thank you. My brother
also came and he always brings a gift, but we don't have one from him,
either.
What to do?
I'd call the party venue, and politely ask them to contact the other
family and politely inquire if there were any extra gifts.

Indeed.

If not, you have two options, as I see it:

(i) Have your son write an ambiguous thank you note, thanking the
child for attending the party.

(ii) Lie through your teeth. ;- Call the family and tell them that
you ran out to the bathroom while your son was opening the
presents,and in just those few moments, things managed to go awry, and
you're having trouble sorting who gave what for thank you notes.

Why on earth would anyone need to lie about this particular
circumstance? The original mix-up with the gifts wasn't her fault at all.

I'd write a note saying something like:

"Thank you so much for attending the party. It was lovely to see you.

By the way, there seem to have been some mix-ups with the gifts - there
was another party going on at the same time as ours, and we're a bit
concerned that some of the gifts from our party may have ended up with
the other people by mistake. We're still trying to track this down. If
you brought us anything which we haven't mentioned, please do let us
know so that we can track it down!"



All the best,

Sarah

--
http://www.goodenoughmummy.typepad.com

"That which can be destroyed by the truth, should be" - P. C. Hodgell

Sarah Vaughan wrote:

...

I'd write a note saying something like:

"Thank you so much for attending the party. It was lovely to see you.

By the way, there seem to have been some mix-ups with the gifts - there
was another party going on at the same time as ours, and we're a bit
concerned that some of the gifts from our party may have ended up with
the other people by mistake. We're still trying to track this down. If
you brought us anything which we haven't mentioned, please do let us
know so that we can track it down!"



All the best,

Sarah

Excellent.

In retrospect, it might have made sense for the birthday kid's mom to
ask the other mom about the gift. That way, when she called the
facility, she could say, "It appears that the item was a blue iPhone
wrapped in a colorful happy birthday wrapping paper with blue ribbon to
go with the iPhone" or whatever the item was.

The other birthday person's dad might say, "Gee, we were wondering who
gave that." I am sure that the other birthday person's family would be
happy to straighten everything out.

It could very well be that for one reason or another, the gift-givers
did not bring gifts (planning on dropping them off later, left them in
the car, etc.), too.

Jeff

On Jun 19, 4:46 am, Sarah Vaughan wrote:
Barbara wrote:
On Jun 17, 12:13 pm, Jeff wrote:
toypup wrote:
Okay, so the party was a huge success. We brought the gifts home to open,
becuase it was at a venue and the logistics were too much for us to open
the gifts there. There were only 7 minutes left after the cake and pizza.
DS started writing thank you notes today. One problem arose. At the
venue, the guests dropped off the presents on a cart at the door. There
are two parties going on at the same time in different rooms. There was
some confusion for the guests, as we had a couple of guests from the other
party come to our party. We did not get a present from one of our guests.
I do not know if he did not bring one or if it landed on the wrong cart. I
don't want the mom to feel put on the spot if I went out and just asked her
if she brought one, but I don't want her to feel we were ungrateful for a
gift, if her son brought one and we don't send a thank you. My brother
also came and he always brings a gift, but we don't have one from him,
either.
What to do?
I'd call the party venue, and politely ask them to contact the other
family and politely inquire if there were any extra gifts.

Indeed.

If not, you have two options, as I see it:

(i) Have your son write an ambiguous thank you note, thanking the
child for attending the party.

(ii) Lie through your teeth. ;- Call the family and tell them that
you ran out to the bathroom while your son was opening the
presents,and in just those few moments, things managed to go awry, and
you're having trouble sorting who gave what for thank you notes.

Why on earth would anyone need to lie about this particular
circumstance? The original mix-up with the gifts wasn't her fault at all.
SNIP

It was the fault of someone who was working on her behalf. Between
her and the party-goer, the fault is entirely hers.

The reason not to say outright that you didn't receive the gift is
because its grubby. It sounds too much like *hey, you came to the
party, now where's my kid's loot* You're also putting the gift giver
in a position where s/he may feel that s/he should be giving another
gift to replace the lost one.

Barbara