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#21
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
On 28 Jan 2006 04:42:12 -0800, Banty wrote:
In article .com, -L. says... Banty wrote: ROTFL! Oh, man, I've been called a stepford wife. :-D Banty It's not funny. It's pathetic. Really. It's just that it's such a - new and unexpected experience! Banty *snort* Gotta love it when someone lacks the imagination to come up with anything better than a Hollywood reference. Nan |
#22
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
In article , Ericka Kammerer says...
Banty wrote: In article .com, -L. says... Banty wrote: ROTFL! Oh, man, I've been called a stepford wife. :-D Banty It's not funny. It's pathetic. Really. It's just that it's such a - new and unexpected experience! C'mon, Banty. Let your inner Stepford wife out! That should be a real hoot to see ;-) It could change your life! Where's that apron my mom made me? Um - hair curlers! Ericka - do I really need to use the hair curlers? Let me practice the blank smile in the mirror.... take the cynical frown off, Banty - smile smile! Not working. Maybe an eyebrow tweeze will help :luck pluck:: .......... no not much Ericka I think it's just hopeless. Banty |
#23
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
In article , Nan says...
On 28 Jan 2006 04:42:12 -0800, Banty wrote: In article .com, -L. says... Banty wrote: ROTFL! Oh, man, I've been called a stepford wife. :-D Banty It's not funny. It's pathetic. Really. It's just that it's such a - new and unexpected experience! Banty *snort* Gotta love it when someone lacks the imagination to come up with anything better than a Hollywood reference. I still can't get over it - nobody has ever called me a Stepford Wife before! Banty |
#24
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
Banty wrote:
In article , Ericka Kammerer says... C'mon, Banty. Let your inner Stepford wife out! That should be a real hoot to see ;-) It could change your life! Where's that apron my mom made me? Um - hair curlers! Ericka - do I really need to use the hair curlers? How are you going to get that perfect hair without them?! Now, get on board, Banty. You know you want to... Let me practice the blank smile in the mirror.... take the cynical frown off, Banty - smile smile! Not working. Maybe an eyebrow tweeze will help :luck pluck:: .......... no not much You probably just need to go have them waxed. Ericka I think it's just hopeless. Good heavens, giving up so easily!? For shame. Back to the dressing room with you until you can turn yourself out properly! Best wishes, Ericka |
#25
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
On 28 Jan 2006 08:53:23 -0800, Banty wrote:
In article , Nan says... On 28 Jan 2006 04:42:12 -0800, Banty wrote: In article .com, -L. says... Banty wrote: ROTFL! Oh, man, I've been called a stepford wife. :-D Banty It's not funny. It's pathetic. Really. It's just that it's such a - new and unexpected experience! Banty *snort* Gotta love it when someone lacks the imagination to come up with anything better than a Hollywood reference. I still can't get over it - nobody has ever called me a Stepford Wife before! Banty Hee hee, when I hear the term Stepford Wife, you just don't come to mind EG Nan |
#26
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
In article , Ericka Kammerer
says... Banty wrote: In article , Ericka Kammerer says... C'mon, Banty. Let your inner Stepford wife out! That should be a real hoot to see ;-) It could change your life! Where's that apron my mom made me? Um - hair curlers! Ericka - do I really need to use the hair curlers? How are you going to get that perfect hair without them?! Now, get on board, Banty. You know you want to... Ohhh, alright I'll try the big ones... if I work really hard on this, I can pass for Katharine Ross.... I'll have to lose even more weight... Oh GOD NO I don't have any of the right kind of dresses! Let me practice the blank smile in the mirror.... take the cynical frown off, Banty - smile smile! Not working. Maybe an eyebrow tweeze will help :luck pluck:: .......... no not much You probably just need to go have them waxed. Anything else? I think I'll really have to work on that smile, though! Ericka I think it's just hopeless. Good heavens, giving up so easily!? For shame. Back to the dressing room with you until you can turn yourself out properly! This is just so haaarrrrd... Banty |
#27
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
To "-L.":
I guess it's either some sort of discrimination, or a social thing like shyness. Suppose it's a social thing. Maybe she and her family are the quiet type. Maybe they like to come to the playgroup and interact with two or three other children but large numbers are just overwhelming to them. Maybe she can't think of any more polite way to turn people away than just ignoring them. (I'd have trouble with that myself.) Maybe she thinks it's rude to stand there holding out a toy for minutes at a time when the other person is obviously not interested. Maybe she thinks the best way to teach a 2-year-old not to do this is to continue ignoring him. Possibly your children are too energetic for her or have been seen being a bit aggressive (hitting, grabbing), possibly while you weren't looking?? Possibly she looks for certain specific personality types and relates to them and ignores everyone else?? Maybe her kids have privately told her they're afraid of, or don't like, your child for some reason?? If it's a racial thing: Here's an idea for how to handle it but I don't know whether it's a good idea or not. You could approach her and say fairly loudly (loud enough for others to hear) something like "Excuse me -- I'd like to find out whether you're interested in chatting with me occasionally?" If she doesn't answer, you can say loud enough for others to hear (but not shouting), "I feel ignored by name." "I feel excluded by name." "I feel it's reasonable at least to get an answer from you, yes or no, whether you're interested in chatting." "Excuse me: are you hard of hearing?" (said in front of her, using sign language at the same time, but politely and sincerely) You can look around and try to make eye contact with others while saying these things. There is the possibility that she (or even possibly others in the room) will respond with open racial hatred. If you're prepared for this possibility, you may be able to remain calm and look dignified, saying something like "I feel I'm being subjected to racism." They may just be making themselves look bad in front of any reasonable people in the room. I think that saying calmly "I believe racism is wrong." "I believe I have a right to ..." looks better than getting upset, and can gain you some respect. I hope this is helpful. No guarantees. I hope you figure out a way of handling it that works for you. |
#28
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
"Catherine Woodgold" wrote in message ... To "-L.": I guess it's either some sort of discrimination, or a social thing like shyness. Suppose it's a social thing. Maybe she and her family are the quiet type. Maybe they like to come to the playgroup and interact with two or three other children but large numbers are just overwhelming to them. Maybe she can't think of any more polite way to turn people away than just ignoring them. (I'd have trouble with that myself.) Maybe she thinks it's rude to stand there holding out a toy for minutes at a time when the other person is obviously not interested. Maybe she thinks the best way to teach a 2-year-old not to do this is to continue ignoring him. Possibly your children are too energetic for her or have been seen being a bit aggressive (hitting, grabbing), possibly while you weren't looking?? Possibly she looks for certain specific personality types and relates to them and ignores everyone else?? Maybe her kids have privately told her they're afraid of, or don't like, your child for some reason?? If it's a racial thing: Here's an idea for how to handle it but I don't know whether it's a good idea or not. You could approach her and say fairly loudly (loud enough for others to hear) something like "Excuse me -- I'd like to find out whether you're interested in chatting with me occasionally?" If she doesn't answer, you can say loud enough for others to hear (but not shouting), "I feel ignored by name." "I feel excluded by name." "I feel it's reasonable at least to get an answer from you, yes or no, whether you're interested in chatting." "Excuse me: are you hard of hearing?" (said in front of her, using sign language at the same time, but politely and sincerely) You can look around and try to make eye contact with others while saying these things. There is the possibility that she (or even possibly others in the room) will respond with open racial hatred. If you're prepared for this possibility, you may be able to remain calm and look dignified, saying something like "I feel I'm being subjected to racism." They may just be making themselves look bad in front of any reasonable people in the room. I think that saying calmly "I believe racism is wrong." "I believe I have a right to ..." looks better than getting upset, and can gain you some respect. I hope this is helpful. No guarantees. I hope you figure out a way of handling it that works for you. I'm sorry to say this Catherine, but this is shockingly bad advice, and not what I would have expected from you. A public confrontation pitched to be purposely overheard? Making eye-contact with the other parents to try to sway them to your side? "Sincerely" using sign-language when she has seen her speak with other parents and knows that she is not actually hard of hearing? I can't believe you would advocate for such rude behavior! Okay, so you prefaced it with, "If it's a racial thing". But at this point we have no way to know that, and no reason to conclude it. If something more happens to make that possibility seem more likely, then I would speak to whoever runs or organizes the play group. Perhaps call a "meeting"of the adults if necessary. If this woman is racially motivated, then she has no place in the playgroup. But to start a loud confrontation without warning in front of all the kids? In the absence of some evidence of racism, I think the woman is entitled to be unfriendly if she wants. I like to chat with other parents, but I'm not one to chat with little kids. I wouldn't ignore them of course, but I would get annoyed if someone else's child continually approached me when I'm there to socialize with my friends while my kids socialized with theirs. In that case, I think -L should just ignore her, steer her child away, and have fun with the more friendly folks there. Bizby |
#29
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
"Banty" wrote in message ... In article , Nan says... On 28 Jan 2006 04:42:12 -0800, Banty wrote: In article .com, -L. says... Banty wrote: ROTFL! Oh, man, I've been called a stepford wife. :-D Banty It's not funny. It's pathetic. Really. It's just that it's such a - new and unexpected experience! Banty *snort* Gotta love it when someone lacks the imagination to come up with anything better than a Hollywood reference. I still can't get over it - nobody has ever called me a Stepford Wife before! Banty I'm so ignorant, I don't even know what it is. |
#30
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UPDATE: playgroup fiasco
In article Ra9Df.1258$ap3.532@trndny03,
"Stephanie" wrote: "Banty" wrote in message I still can't get over it - nobody has ever called me a Stepford Wife before! Banty I'm so ignorant, I don't even know what it is. It's a reference to a 1974 movie (later remade) where the husbands of uppity women in a nice American suburb replace their wives with demure, passive robots. Here's Banty and some friends, happily shopping: http://www.bergen-filmklubb.no/images/The_Stepford_Wives.jpg -- Sara accompanied by TK, due in April Quoting, for users of Google Groups: http://groups.google.com/support/bin...4213&topic=250 |
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