New member has questions

I'm going through a m/c now. I had some of what I would describe as burst
of blood two days in a row prior to steady bleeding. I was worried and
first went to the ER where I was told my cervix was closed and that I was
just very early into my pregnancy. I was given a paper entitled "possible
miscarriage" which stated I should have bed rest and go back to the ER if I
soak 3 pads a hour for 3 hours straight with sever cramping. I never had
that kind of bleeding or cramping. What happend with me was just like a
regular period except I passed some tissue. Is your bleeding brown or
bright red? Also with me I had sore breast and that suddenly stopped about
2 days before I started bleeding. Has any of your pregnancy symptoms
stopped? Just try to rest...no heavy lifting or anything like that. And try
not to worry too much. If it happens, it happens and worrying won't change
things one way or the other. Keep in mind that if you do m/c its because
there was a problem with the fetus and it was nothing that you did
wrong...just kinda bad luck.

I sincerely hope that everything works out for you. Just know that what
ever happens you're not alone.

Best of luck!

Julie

Erika wrote in message
...


Hi everyone.

I am a 30 ys o Swedish woman who is pregnant for the first time. I
gave up the pill at christmas and was never regular after that, more
five weeks cyckles than four week ones that I used to have "back in
the old pre-pill days".
I hade my last period on the 2 of august. On the 1 och september i
started to get neausia and very sore breasts. On the 4th I took a home
pregnancy test (clearblue) and it turned out to be positive.
My DH and me are very happy.

Now last saturday I started bleeding. Not that much (less than a
period) but still very worrying.

I called my mw who told me to call the womens clinic at the hospital.
I did and got an appointment the next day (tuesday)

The doctor could not say if I would miscarry or not. All she could
say was that the cervix was ok and that the "sack" (don´t know the
proper english word here) was 1 cm diametre suggesting I was 5 full
weeks gone + 3 days.
"Go home, wait and see" was her advice.

I am still bleeding, and I am still worried.

Can someone advice me as to what to do?

Hi everyone.

I am a 30 ys o Swedish woman who is pregnant for the first time. I
gave up the pill at christmas and was never regular after that, more
five weeks cyckles than four week ones that I used to have "back in
the old pre-pill days".
I hade my last period on the 2 of august. On the 1 och september i
started to get neausia and very sore breasts. On the 4th I took a home
pregnancy test (clearblue) and it turned out to be positive.
My DH and me are very happy.

Now last saturday I started bleeding. Not that much (less than a
period) but still very worrying.

I called my mw who told me to call the womens clinic at the hospital.
I did and got an appointment the next day (tuesday)

The doctor could not say if I would miscarry or not. All she could
say was that the cervix was ok and that the "sack" (don´t know the
proper english word here) was 1 cm diametre suggesting I was 5 full
weeks gone + 3 days.
"Go home, wait and see" was her advice.

I am still bleeding, and I am still worried.

Can someone advice me as to what to do?

"Erika" wrote in message
...


Hi everyone.

I am a 30 ys o Swedish woman who is pregnant for the first time. I
gave up the pill at christmas and was never regular after that, more
five weeks cyckles than four week ones that I used to have "back in
the old pre-pill days".
I hade my last period on the 2 of august. On the 1 och september i
started to get neausia and very sore breasts. On the 4th I took a home
pregnancy test (clearblue) and it turned out to be positive.
My DH and me are very happy.

Now last saturday I started bleeding. Not that much (less than a
period) but still very worrying.

I called my mw who told me to call the womens clinic at the hospital.
I did and got an appointment the next day (tuesday)

The doctor could not say if I would miscarry or not. All she could
say was that the cervix was ok and that the "sack" (don´t know the
proper english word here) was 1 cm diametre suggesting I was 5 full
weeks gone + 3 days.
"Go home, wait and see" was her advice.

I am still bleeding, and I am still worried.

Can someone advice me as to what to do?

Unfortunately, I don't think there's anything you *can* do. If you've got a
good, chromosomally normal embryo, you will probably have a good pregnancy.
If you don't, then you probably don't want this pregnancy (as much as it
hurts to say goodbye) even if it was within your control. But it took me a
long time to accept that for myself and I did need to get a second opinion
and really think on it.

If you do miscarry it is not your fault. It's a natural part of
reproduction that many, many of us experience. And some experience without
even knowing, because they are not keeping track of their periods and don't
know they are pregnant.

A very realistic percentage of sperm/egg combinations are genetically
defective, but it does not change that you dreamed that around a certain
time next year you would have a baby.

There are things the doctor can do to let you know if you are having a
miscarriage, like check blood levels of hcg and progesterone, and do a
follow-up scan to see if the sac has continued to develop. You could ask
for these, but it is not going to affect your outcome. I was cramping when
I showed up to the doctor with my early miscarriage, and I remember they did
think the bleeding meant miscarriage because of the cramps, but they
confirmed it with a blood test. When I got the news, I felt free to take
medication for the cramps and drink wine and things that I wouldn't have
done if I was waiting around hoping for the best. I was sad for a long
time, though.

-- Dagny

On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 18:59:12 GMT, "Dagny" wrote:

Unfortunately, I don't think there's anything you *can* do. If you've got a
good, chromosomally normal embryo, you will probably have a good pregnancy.
If you don't, then you probably don't want this pregnancy (as much as it
hurts to say goodbye) even if it was within your control. But it took me a
long time to accept that for myself and I did need to get a second opinion
and really think on it.

If you do miscarry it is not your fault. It's a natural part of
reproduction that many, many of us experience. And some experience without
even knowing, because they are not keeping track of their periods and don't
know they are pregnant.

A very realistic percentage of sperm/egg combinations are genetically
defective, but it does not change that you dreamed that around a certain
time next year you would have a baby.

There are things the doctor can do to let you know if you are having a
miscarriage, like check blood levels of hcg and progesterone, and do a
follow-up scan to see if the sac has continued to develop. You could ask
for these, but it is not going to affect your outcome. I was cramping when
I showed up to the doctor with my early miscarriage, and I remember they did
think the bleeding meant miscarriage because of the cramps, but they
confirmed it with a blood test. When I got the news, I felt free to take
medication for the cramps and drink wine and things that I wouldn't have
done if I was waiting around hoping for the best. I was sad for a long
time, though.

-- Dagny



Yeah In understand that if I am m/c-ing there is nothing they can do,
but do you think I should ask for another vul or what? I am worried to
the point that I am off work at the moment. ( I am dead frightened I
will misscarry there)

Should I interpret this silence as you all thinking I am misscarrying
then?

"Erika" wrote in message
news
Should I interpret this silence as you all thinking I am misscarrying
then?

No, a lot of people do not post much on weekends.

Try "vul" again, what is vul? What are you afraid will happen if you go on
to work and do miscarry? I took off from working because I was emotionally
upset, but passing a 5.5 or 6 week sac was not worse than a heavy, crampy
period. But if you need conclusive evidence either way, for your own
sanity, you can ask for a blood test for hcg. Or a scan this week to see if
there's been growth.

On Sun, 21 Sep 2003 03:50:50 -0500, "JNJ"
wrote:

I'm going through a m/c now. I had some of what I would describe as burst
of blood two days in a row prior to steady bleeding. I was worried and
first went to the ER where I was told my cervix was closed and that I was
just very early into my pregnancy. I was given a paper entitled "possible
miscarriage" which stated I should have bed rest and go back to the ER if I
soak 3 pads a hour for 3 hours straight with sever cramping. I never had
that kind of bleeding or cramping. What happend with me was just like a
regular period except I passed some tissue. Is your bleeding brown or
bright red? Also with me I had sore breast and that suddenly stopped about
2 days before I started bleeding. Has any of your pregnancy symptoms
stopped? Just try to rest...no heavy lifting or anything like that. And try
not to worry too much. If it happens, it happens and worrying won't change
things one way or the other. Keep in mind that if you do m/c its because
there was a problem with the fetus and it was nothing that you did
wrong...just kinda bad luck.

I sincerely hope that everything works out for you. Just know that what
ever happens you're not alone.

Best of luck!

Julie


I am sorry for you having to go through a m/c.
I hope you get pregnant again when you feel up to it and theat
everything works out fine.

My bleeding is sometimes red, sometimes pink and sometimes brown. It
is enever enough to stain my underwear. (or hasn´t been so far
anyway) no tissue (i have been on the look out) on the contrairy it
seems very thin.

I know that it is for the best if it is deformed or such. It is just
not knowing that is so horrible. As it has been for the last week I
can´t take joy in being pregnant and I can´t grive a m/c.

"Erika" wrote in message
...

My bleeding is sometimes red, sometimes pink and sometimes brown. It
is enever enough to stain my underwear. (or hasn´t been so far
anyway) no tissue (i have been on the look out) on the contrairy it
seems very thin.


Hm, well, maybe you are just spotting. Brown means you are leaking blood so
slowly it has time to change color before you see it. Everyone is different
and spotting is not uncommon in early pregnancy while your uterus gets
adjusted to its new job.

The fact that a miscarriage, particularly an early one, is indicative
of a malformed or non-viable baby is so often mentioned here that I
feel the need to speak up.

Personally, I don't think the "it probably wasn't a viable fetus"
thoughts are very helpful in the case of a miscarriage. Certainly
they aren't for me. I don't know why I miscarried and neither does
anyone else. I mourn the loss of our child.

Thinking that is was "all for best" may be helpful to some, but would
anyone even consider saying something similar to a parent who lost a
born child to a genetic disease? Imagine saying, "You probably didn't
want him; he would never had lived to be a healthy adult."

I realize that parents here have experienced this type of loss, and
these thoughts may have helped them. However, I bristle at this idea.

Here's a poem that helped me:
http://www.mothering.com/poems/nobody-knew-you.shtml

[Of course, if someone experiences multiple (3+) miscarriages, genetic
counseling and other medical screening is indicated. This is
different than suggesting that one work through the grief process by
considering the child to be better off dead.)

--
Help the women of Afganistan
http://www.rawa.org/

"You despise me, don't you?"
"If I gave you any thought, I probably would."

"Fia" First in April wrote in message
...
The fact that a miscarriage, particularly an early one, is indicative
of a malformed or non-viable baby is so often mentioned here that I
feel the need to speak up.

Personally, I don't think the "it probably wasn't a viable fetus"
thoughts are very helpful in the case of a miscarriage. Certainly
they aren't for me. I don't know why I miscarried and neither does
anyone else. I mourn the loss of our child.

Thinking that is was "all for best" may be helpful to some, but would
anyone even consider saying something similar to a parent who lost a
born child to a genetic disease? Imagine saying, "You probably didn't
want him; he would never had lived to be a healthy adult."

I realize that parents here have experienced this type of loss, and
these thoughts may have helped them. However, I bristle at this idea.

Here's a poem that helped me:
http://www.mothering.com/poems/nobody-knew-you.shtml

[Of course, if someone experiences multiple (3+) miscarriages, genetic
counseling and other medical screening is indicated. This is
different than suggesting that one work through the grief process by
considering the child to be better off dead.)

I don't think that people saying that the genetic problem leading to
miscarriage are suggesting that the baby was better off dead. I think they
are more likely saying that it wasn't meant to be. I've never (knock on
wood) personally experienced a miscarriage myself, but whenever the thought
or some frightful event occurs (i.e., cramping, bright red blood), I tell
myself that maybe it wasn't meant to be. It's sort of my way with coping
with it. A few times, I thought I might be miscarrying, and the line of
reasoning really did help me work through it to prepare myself for the
worst. Though, when DH says it, it comes out without much feeling, like I'm
not really losing a life, so that's irritating to me. So sorry for your
loss.