punishment

Hi,

I'm a 13 yo girl. I'd like to know if other parents agree I should be a
bit resentful of my mom.

She's kinda nice, caring, show love, a wonderful mom. But she has a
habit I don't like. When I or my litlle brother do something wrong, she
almost always gives a punishment. She's understanding, it's never a
harsh punishment, it's just something she calls a lesson to make us
think. This makes me a bit resentful, because no one is perfect,
everyone makes mistakes and I don't think people should be punished
every time they do a mitake. Right? I must say in my case it's not that
bad, cause my mom shows love even when she punishes. I know she's sure
shes doing her best, but she could be more flexible. We are good kids,
we are no monsters.

Last Friday I did something I know I shouldn't. I ended up giving up to
some friends and went with them to a mall in the car of a 19 yo guy
that my parents don't know. Nothing bad happened, he's a nice guy, but
I know I shouldnt do that and of course I'm not allowed. But, well, I
didnt think. I guess my mom would never find out, but I told her and
apologized. I told her the truth, agreed it was a mistake. Frankly, I
dont think I deserved any punishment, I didnt do anything awful. My mom
said she was proud of my honesty, said I was forgiven, gave me a big
hug, several kisses...and a punishment. She said I was a wonderful
girl but needed a lesson to remind me I must think before acting.I
didnt make a fuss, just said, Oh mom, come on, I just made a mistake.
But though she called me hun and showed love, she didnt back off. So,
for a week, I'll have to spend one hour a day doing some extra
chores in the kitchen or something like that (and wearing a frilly
pinafore, something mom finds really sweet and I dont like). Just "to
make me think", because she loves me so much.

Ok, this is a light punishment, and though I was being punished I had a
very good weekend, had a lot of fun. But I dont think this is fair.
After all Im a good girl, dont get in troubles, get good grades.
Everyone has the right to make a mistake sometimes, no one is God!
Well, of course I´ll obey, of course I love my mom and wont make any
fuss. I know it's much better to have a mom like her than one that
never punishes but dont care, either. But frankly, Im a bit resentful
and dont know if I should tell mom how I feel.

I'd lke advice from smeone older and more experienced than me

Thank you

Jane

Cute girl wrote:
Hi,

I'm a 13 yo girl. I'd like to know if other parents agree I should be a
bit resentful of my mom.

She's kinda nice, caring, show love, a wonderful mom. But she has a
habit I don't like. When I or my litlle brother do something wrong, she
almost always gives a punishment. She's understanding, it's never a
harsh punishment, it's just something she calls a lesson to make us
think. This makes me a bit resentful, because no one is perfect,
everyone makes mistakes and I don't think people should be punished
every time they do a mitake. Right? I must say in my case it's not that
bad, cause my mom shows love even when she punishes. I know she's sure
shes doing her best, but she could be more flexible. We are good kids,
we are no monsters.

Last Friday I did something I know I shouldn't.



If you did something you know you shouldn't do, you should be punished.
The consquences could have been horrible. You could have been in a car
crash, raped, kidnapped, killed. How many times do we have to hear
these kind of stories in the news? Kids your age have bad judgment
sometimes and your mom wants to make you think next time before you do
something that could have deadly consquences. She treated you fair,
IMO.



I ended up giving up to
some friends and went with them to a mall in the car of a 19 yo guy
that my parents don't know. Nothing bad happened, he's a nice guy, but
I know I shouldnt do that and of course I'm not allowed. But, well, I
didnt think. I guess my mom would never find out, but I told her and
apologized. I told her the truth, agreed it was a mistake. Frankly, I
dont think I deserved any punishment, I didnt do anything awful. My mom
said she was proud of my honesty, said I was forgiven, gave me a big
hug, several kisses...and a punishment. She said I was a wonderful
girl but needed a lesson to remind me I must think before acting.I
didnt make a fuss, just said, Oh mom, come on, I just made a mistake.
But though she called me hun and showed love, she didnt back off. So,
for a week, I'll have to spend one hour a day doing some extra
chores in the kitchen or something like that (and wearing a frilly
pinafore, something mom finds really sweet and I dont like). Just "to
make me think", because she loves me so much.

Ok, this is a light punishment, and though I was being punished I had a
very good weekend, had a lot of fun. But I dont think this is fair.
After all Im a good girl, dont get in troubles, get good grades.
Everyone has the right to make a mistake sometimes, no one is God!
Well, of course I´ll obey, of course I love my mom and wont make any
fuss. I know it's much better to have a mom like her than one that
never punishes but dont care, either. But frankly, Im a bit resentful
and dont know if I should tell mom how I feel.

I'd lke advice from smeone older and more experienced than me

Thank you

Jane

Consider youself lucky.

If my son (who is your age) ever pulled a stunt like that, and went off with
a 19yr old without like that, he'd be grounded for a long time. And
punishment like that would be; no friends, no tv, no video games, no nothing
for a period of time, plus the extra chores

Then again, my neice recently lost a close friend who had gone to her
boyfriends house and one thing lead to another, and they got in the car with
another friend, were in an accident, and my niece's friend ended up being
killed in the accident. She was 16yrs old. She wasn't supposed to have
been in the car with a strange boy. She also had left her purse at her
boyfriend's house. The police could not contact her mom, so her mom found
out about it when she was home watching the news and they were talking about
this horrible accident where a 16yr old girl had been killed. Another
friend called her mom to say that she knew she'd gone into the car and the
car on the news looks like the car they left in.

It is very sad, and you have to think about the things that could happen to
you by doing irresponsible things. You were lucky this time - nothing
happened. But think about the mom, and friends of my neice's friend. They
all lost a dear friend who did the same irresponsible thing you did.

I can tell you, when I was 15, I also lost a dear friend to a car accident.
In that case, the driver was a friend of the family, and that poor boy had
to go thru life knowing he had killed 2 people (my friend and another person
in the car). He did not come back to school.

As for the punishment you get - those are lessons, and your mom is doing a
very good parenting job if you are, in general, a good kid, but the only way
you actually do learn is to learn from your mistakes and pay the
consequences for your mistakes.

As adults, we also have to pay our consequences for our mistakes. By
learning to accept responsibility as kids, you are better equipt to deal
with being an adult and learn to accept responsibility for your life. That
is life! You will be a better, more responsible person for it.


"Cute girl" wrote in message
ps.com...
Hi,

I'm a 13 yo girl. I'd like to know if other parents agree I should be a
bit resentful of my mom.

She's kinda nice, caring, show love, a wonderful mom. But she has a
habit I don't like. When I or my litlle brother do something wrong, she
almost always gives a punishment. She's understanding, it's never a
harsh punishment, it's just something she calls a lesson to make us
think. This makes me a bit resentful, because no one is perfect,
everyone makes mistakes and I don't think people should be punished
every time they do a mitake. Right? I must say in my case it's not that
bad, cause my mom shows love even when she punishes. I know she's sure
shes doing her best, but she could be more flexible. We are good kids,
we are no monsters.

Last Friday I did something I know I shouldn't. I ended up giving up to
some friends and went with them to a mall in the car of a 19 yo guy
that my parents don't know. Nothing bad happened, he's a nice guy, but
I know I shouldnt do that and of course I'm not allowed. But, well, I
didnt think. I guess my mom would never find out, but I told her and
apologized. I told her the truth, agreed it was a mistake. Frankly, I
dont think I deserved any punishment, I didnt do anything awful. My mom
said she was proud of my honesty, said I was forgiven, gave me a big
hug, several kisses...and a punishment. She said I was a wonderful
girl but needed a lesson to remind me I must think before acting.I
didnt make a fuss, just said, Oh mom, come on, I just made a mistake.
But though she called me hun and showed love, she didnt back off. So,
for a week, I'll have to spend one hour a day doing some extra
chores in the kitchen or something like that (and wearing a frilly
pinafore, something mom finds really sweet and I dont like). Just "to
make me think", because she loves me so much.

Ok, this is a light punishment, and though I was being punished I had a
very good weekend, had a lot of fun. But I dont think this is fair.
After all Im a good girl, dont get in troubles, get good grades.
Everyone has the right to make a mistake sometimes, no one is God!
Well, of course I´ll obey, of course I love my mom and wont make any
fuss. I know it's much better to have a mom like her than one that
never punishes but dont care, either. But frankly, Im a bit resentful
and dont know if I should tell mom how I feel.

I'd lke advice from smeone older and more experienced than me

Thank you

Jane

She is teaching you a life long rule. Every action has a consequence.
She has trained you well to know WHAT you did was stupid.....yet you choose
to do what was stupid therefore there is consequences......be thankful your
mum is teaching you these instead of the 19 yr old who could hve raped you,
bashed you or killed you. Or all of the aforementioned!
If this post is lagit, then she sounds like a wonderful mum....be so very
very thankful she is! And learn from your punishments, and take notes for
when you are a parent.
All the best
Fiona
"Cute girl" wrote in message
ps.com...
Hi,

I'm a 13 yo girl. I'd like to know if other parents agree I should be a
bit resentful of my mom.

She's kinda nice, caring, show love, a wonderful mom. But she has a
habit I don't like. When I or my litlle brother do something wrong, she
almost always gives a punishment. She's understanding, it's never a
harsh punishment, it's just something she calls a lesson to make us
think. This makes me a bit resentful, because no one is perfect,
everyone makes mistakes and I don't think people should be punished
every time they do a mitake. Right? I must say in my case it's not that
bad, cause my mom shows love even when she punishes. I know she's sure
shes doing her best, but she could be more flexible. We are good kids,
we are no monsters.

Last Friday I did something I know I shouldn't. I ended up giving up to
some friends and went with them to a mall in the car of a 19 yo guy
that my parents don't know. Nothing bad happened, he's a nice guy, but
I know I shouldnt do that and of course I'm not allowed. But, well, I
didnt think. I guess my mom would never find out, but I told her and
apologized. I told her the truth, agreed it was a mistake. Frankly, I
dont think I deserved any punishment, I didnt do anything awful. My mom
said she was proud of my honesty, said I was forgiven, gave me a big
hug, several kisses...and a punishment. She said I was a wonderful
girl but needed a lesson to remind me I must think before acting.I
didnt make a fuss, just said, Oh mom, come on, I just made a mistake.
But though she called me hun and showed love, she didnt back off. So,
for a week, I'll have to spend one hour a day doing some extra
chores in the kitchen or something like that (and wearing a frilly
pinafore, something mom finds really sweet and I dont like). Just "to
make me think", because she loves me so much.

Ok, this is a light punishment, and though I was being punished I had a
very good weekend, had a lot of fun. But I dont think this is fair.
After all Im a good girl, dont get in troubles, get good grades.
Everyone has the right to make a mistake sometimes, no one is God!
Well, of course I´ll obey, of course I love my mom and wont make any
fuss. I know it's much better to have a mom like her than one that
never punishes but dont care, either. But frankly, Im a bit resentful
and dont know if I should tell mom how I feel.

I'd lke advice from smeone older and more experienced than me

Thank you

Jane

Cute girl wrote:
[snip]
Ok, this is a light punishment, and though I was being punished I had a
very good weekend, had a lot of fun. But I dont think this is fair.
After all Im a good girl, dont get in troubles, get good grades.
Everyone has the right to make a mistake sometimes, no one is God!
Well, of course I´ll obey, of course I love my mom and wont make any
fuss. I know it's much better to have a mom like her than one that
never punishes but dont care, either. But frankly, Im a bit resentful
and dont know if I should tell mom how I feel.

I'd lke advice from smeone older and more experienced than me

Hi Jane

I'm pleased you're doing well at school and don't get into trouble.

Everyone has the right to make mistakes, but what you did wasn't
really a mistake. You deliberately did something you knew your mom
would object to.

OK, it might have been tough to say to your friends "I can't come".
You might know the 19yo, and know he is nice. But even so, you
*chose* to go.

Being a teenager means sometimes you will resent your parents. This
time, I wouldn't tell. If it had been a genuine error on your part,
then maybe tell them. But not this time.

Oh and the apron - could you find an apron that you think is OK and see
if your mum would let you use that instead of the frilly one?

HTH
--
Penny Gaines
UK mum to three

"LFM" wrote in
:

Consider youself lucky.

i really hate to say this, but i think you've been trolled.
this almost exact same post was on m.k. in the spring. i think
it may also have been posted here.
lee

"enigma" wrote in message
. ..
"LFM" wrote in
:

Consider youself lucky.

i really hate to say this, but i think you've been trolled.
this almost exact same post was on m.k. in the spring. i think
it may also have been posted here.
lee

I think the same thing... I actually wasted about 6-7 lines worth of my
time then realized I didn't want to bother replying to a troll.
The original post smells of troll from miles away. I kinda remember
something similar a while back as well.

"enigma" wrote in message
. ..
"LFM" wrote in
:

Consider youself lucky.

i really hate to say this, but i think you've been trolled.
this almost exact same post was on m.k. in the spring. i think
it may also have been posted here.
lee

Your right .. and I think the same story is also posted from the mothers
POV.
ah .well, we can learn from trolls too

In article ,
"Knit Chic" wrote:

"enigma" wrote in message
. ..
"LFM" wrote in
:

Consider youself lucky.

i really hate to say this, but i think you've been trolled.
this almost exact same post was on m.k. in the spring. i think
it may also have been posted here.
lee

Your right .. and I think the same story is also posted from the mothers
POV.
ah .well, we can learn from trolls too




They've been known to start some of our BEST discussions.

I must have smelled a troll as I was reading it, because I kept
expecting the punishment to be something totally whacked, instead of so
relatively normal.

--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

dragonlady wrote:
In article ,
"Knit Chic" wrote:

"enigma" wrote in message
. ..
"LFM" wrote in
:

Consider youself lucky.

i really hate to say this, but i think you've been trolled.
this almost exact same post was on m.k. in the spring. i think
it may also have been posted here.
lee

Your right .. and I think the same story is also posted from the mothers
POV.
ah .well, we can learn from trolls too




They've been known to start some of our BEST discussions.

I must have smelled a troll as I was reading it, because I kept
expecting the punishment to be something totally whacked, instead of so
relatively normal.


Just a better quality troll than most you see these days.

There's one poster in ASAD and ASA that I keep suspecting *may* be a
troll... but then again, he may not. If he is, he's doing a *much*
better troll than you usually see these days. A good troll is one
where you can't tell that it's a troll. Most are flagrantly obvious.

Kitten