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"Cry for help" - what to do?



 
 
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  #1  
Old September 29th 04, 10:05 PM
UB-1983
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Posts: n/a
Default "Cry for help" - what to do?

Last week, I found my teenager reading with some curiosity
http://sweetval.blogspot.com

It's a blog, fairly well-written, supposedly by a girl named Valerie who
lives in Wells, NY, a very small town in the Adirondack region of NY.
The blog details the purported sexual awakening of the girl who
supposedly writes it.

In about ten days, she's managed to lose her virginity, have oral and
anal sex with multiple boys, then discover she's a lesbian and have
relationships with two different girls. It's even illustrated with
photos showing two different girls performing oral sex on boys, and of
someone stripping in a poker game.

The girl gives enough information about herself that, if true, would
make her easy to identify, including her yahoo messaging ID.

I wasn't particularly upset with my teenager reading the blog; a link to
it had come in on IM, and any teen would be curious. We talked about it.

But my question is, either the writer of this blog is a sick
pornographer (if the stuff in it is made up), or is really, really
crying out for help. To be that sexually active and promiscuous at 15,
AND put full details and identifying information and photos on the web
for all to see DOES seem like she'd benefit from some counseling, right?
So should I call her school (it's Wells High School, 518-924-6000, if
the information she provides is true) and report her so she can get
help? Or should I leave well enough alone?
  #2  
Old September 29th 04, 10:19 PM
Banty
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Default

In article ,
UB-1983 says...



::snip incredible post, aimed at the incredibly gullible (improbable), or the
puriently interested (proable), with URL, enticing details, and even phone
number (!) included::

Contact your primary physician for referral to a mental health specialist.

Yes - you.

Banty

  #3  
Old September 29th 04, 11:38 PM
Donna Metler
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Posts: n/a
Default


"UB-1983" wrote in message
...
Last week, I found my teenager reading with some curiosity
http://sweetval.blogspot.com

It's a blog, fairly well-written, supposedly by a girl named Valerie who
lives in Wells, NY, a very small town in the Adirondack region of NY.
The blog details the purported sexual awakening of the girl who
supposedly writes it.

In about ten days, she's managed to lose her virginity, have oral and
anal sex with multiple boys, then discover she's a lesbian and have
relationships with two different girls. It's even illustrated with
photos showing two different girls performing oral sex on boys, and of
someone stripping in a poker game.

The girl gives enough information about herself that, if true, would
make her easy to identify, including her yahoo messaging ID.

I wasn't particularly upset with my teenager reading the blog; a link to
it had come in on IM, and any teen would be curious. We talked about it.

But my question is, either the writer of this blog is a sick
pornographer (if the stuff in it is made up), or is really, really
crying out for help. To be that sexually active and promiscuous at 15,
AND put full details and identifying information and photos on the web
for all to see DOES seem like she'd benefit from some counseling, right?
So should I call her school (it's Wells High School, 518-924-6000, if
the information she provides is true) and report her so she can get
help? Or should I leave well enough alone?


I would call guidance, just in case. It can't hurt anything-if the student
doesn't exist, the school would have a better chance of getting the ISP to
pull the site, and if she does, even if she's making 90% of it up, she'd
probably benefit from some help.



  #4  
Old September 29th 04, 11:48 PM
Banty
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Posts: n/a
Default

In article , Donna Metler says...
::snip::

I would call guidance, just in case. It can't hurt anything-if the student
doesn't exist, the school would have a better chance of getting the ISP to
pull the site, and if she does, even if she's making 90% of it up, she'd
probably benefit from some help.




Yeah - good idea, then the ISP will quick take it down and no one will find our
where the girl lives, what her sexual interests are, etc. etc. to make sure she
doesn't get harmed!

....wait a minute....now does that seem to what motivated the OP? Is his post
consistent with such a concern??

C'mon, think Donna.

Banty

  #5  
Old September 30th 04, 12:24 AM
Donna Metler
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Posts: n/a
Default


"Banty" wrote in message
...
In article , Donna Metler

says...
::snip::

I would call guidance, just in case. It can't hurt anything-if the

student
doesn't exist, the school would have a better chance of getting the ISP

to
pull the site, and if she does, even if she's making 90% of it up, she'd
probably benefit from some help.




Yeah - good idea, then the ISP will quick take it down and no one will

find our
where the girl lives, what her sexual interests are, etc. etc. to make

sure she
doesn't get harmed!

...wait a minute....now does that seem to what motivated the OP? Is his

post
consistent with such a concern??

C'mon, think Donna.

Unfortunately, I've been moderating a teen board for over a year, and I know
just how extreme some of the things these kids post, especially in live
journals/blogs. There have been a few cases where if I had the ability to
call a school counselor, I would have done so, without even blinking because
of things said online. Unfortunately, one side effect of protecting IDs so
teens are safe online is that the information isn't available even to site
administrators. I've also seen teens post some really dangerous identifying
information online, even on our board where we automatically delete posts
with identifying information as soon as we catch it.

So the combination didn't strike me as being immediately farfetched at all,
unfortunately.

Banty



  #6  
Old September 30th 04, 12:49 AM
Banty
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

In article , Donna Metler says...


"Banty" wrote in message
...
In article , Donna Metler

says...
::snip::

I would call guidance, just in case. It can't hurt anything-if the

student
doesn't exist, the school would have a better chance of getting the ISP

to
pull the site, and if she does, even if she's making 90% of it up, she'd
probably benefit from some help.




Yeah - good idea, then the ISP will quick take it down and no one will

find our
where the girl lives, what her sexual interests are, etc. etc. to make

sure she
doesn't get harmed!

...wait a minute....now does that seem to what motivated the OP? Is his

post
consistent with such a concern??

C'mon, think Donna.

Unfortunately, I've been moderating a teen board for over a year, and I know
just how extreme some of the things these kids post, especially in live
journals/blogs. There have been a few cases where if I had the ability to
call a school counselor, I would have done so, without even blinking because
of things said online. Unfortunately, one side effect of protecting IDs so
teens are safe online is that the information isn't available even to site
administrators. I've also seen teens post some really dangerous identifying
information online, even on our board where we automatically delete posts
with identifying information as soon as we catch it.

So the combination didn't strike me as being immediately farfetched at all,
unfortunately.


One more time with emphasis:

It's not the BLOG which I'm saying is far-fetched, it's that there would be a
authentic USENET post about it which SPECIFICALLY REPEATS IN THE USENET POST all
the personal and tillitating details, down to phone numbers.

The OP is clearly not interested in helping or protecting this girl. He/she
wants to PROPAGATE the information and ADVERTISE, as in BRING ATTENTION TO the
website.

Get it now?

In other words, responding with obvious "call her counsellor", repeating all
that wunnerful information the OP clearly wanted to PROPOGATE, isn't a smart
thing to do. So, Donna, since you get posts deleted from your teen boards, will
you at least get that removed from Google?

Think - what would a REAL concerned poster do? Go out of his way to state the
town the girl lives in and what kind of setting it is in? Heck no. (I mean
really, didn't that strike you as a bit odd??!?) Put the URL out there again?
Heck no. Give out her HIGH SCHOOL PHONE NUMBER?? Heck NO!! He/she would
describe the website, perhaps STATE (but not repeat the exact info) that info is
available in that website, then ask what to do. Although what to do is fairly
obvious.

This teen could well be the OP's girlfriend, and he's getting his jollies this
way.

Banty (more caps than I've pounded out in a long time, but really, this is a
'head explode')

  #7  
Old September 30th 04, 03:16 AM
UB-1983
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

In article ,
"Donna Metler" wrote:

"UB-1983" wrote in message
...
Last week, I found my teenager reading with some curiosity
http://sweetval.blogspot.com

It's a blog, fairly well-written, supposedly by a girl named Valerie who
lives in Wells, NY, a very small town in the Adirondack region of NY.
The blog details the purported sexual awakening of the girl who
supposedly writes it.

In about ten days, she's managed to lose her virginity, have oral and
anal sex with multiple boys, then discover she's a lesbian and have
relationships with two different girls. It's even illustrated with
photos showing two different girls performing oral sex on boys, and of
someone stripping in a poker game.

The girl gives enough information about herself that, if true, would
make her easy to identify, including her yahoo messaging ID.

I wasn't particularly upset with my teenager reading the blog; a link to
it had come in on IM, and any teen would be curious. We talked about it.

But my question is, either the writer of this blog is a sick
pornographer (if the stuff in it is made up), or is really, really
crying out for help. To be that sexually active and promiscuous at 15,
AND put full details and identifying information and photos on the web
for all to see DOES seem like she'd benefit from some counseling, right?
So should I call her school (it's Wells High School, 518-924-6000, if
the information she provides is true) and report her so she can get
help? Or should I leave well enough alone?


I would call guidance, just in case. It can't hurt anything-if the student
doesn't exist, the school would have a better chance of getting the ISP to
pull the site, and if she does, even if she's making 90% of it up, she'd
probably benefit from some help.




I saw my motives or sanity being questioned in misc.kids.

The phone number I've posted is for the high school, not for the girl.
I deliberately didn't post the girl's yahoo ID.

My hope is that someone who reads this thread might be familiar with the
school and/or the girl, and get her the help she needs.

Certainly if my daughter were that way, I'd want to know about it, and
if my daughter were posting all that specific stuff about herself on the
web, someone would be concerned enough to run it up the flagpole high
enough so that either her school or I would be given the chance to help
her.

That said, since this is such sensitive subject area and I arguably may
have butted in farther than appropriate, I'll now butt out. But I hope
someone else reads the thread and, if the girl and her story are real,
gets her some help.
  #8  
Old October 1st 04, 01:57 AM
dejablues
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default


"UB-1983" wrote in message
...
In article ,
"Donna Metler" wrote:

"UB-1983" wrote in message
...
Last week, I found my teenager reading with some curiosity
http://sweetval.blogspot.com

It's a blog, fairly well-written, supposedly by a girl named Valerie

who
lives in Wells, NY, a very small town in the Adirondack region of NY.
The blog details the purported sexual awakening of the girl who
supposedly writes it.

In about ten days, she's managed to lose her virginity, have oral and
anal sex with multiple boys, then discover she's a lesbian and have
relationships with two different girls. It's even illustrated with
photos showing two different girls performing oral sex on boys, and of
someone stripping in a poker game.

The girl gives enough information about herself that, if true, would
make her easy to identify, including her yahoo messaging ID.

I wasn't particularly upset with my teenager reading the blog; a link

to
it had come in on IM, and any teen would be curious. We talked about

it.

But my question is, either the writer of this blog is a sick
pornographer (if the stuff in it is made up), or is really, really
crying out for help. To be that sexually active and promiscuous at

15,
AND put full details and identifying information and photos on the web
for all to see DOES seem like she'd benefit from some counseling,

right?
So should I call her school (it's Wells High School, 518-924-6000, if
the information she provides is true) and report her so she can get
help? Or should I leave well enough alone?


I would call guidance, just in case. It can't hurt anything-if the

student
doesn't exist, the school would have a better chance of getting the ISP

to
pull the site, and if she does, even if she's making 90% of it up, she'd
probably benefit from some help.




I saw my motives or sanity being questioned in misc.kids.

The phone number I've posted is for the high school, not for the girl.
I deliberately didn't post the girl's yahoo ID.

My hope is that someone who reads this thread might be familiar with the
school and/or the girl, and get her the help she needs.

Certainly if my daughter were that way, I'd want to know about it, and
if my daughter were posting all that specific stuff about herself on the
web, someone would be concerned enough to run it up the flagpole high
enough so that either her school or I would be given the chance to help
her.

That said, since this is such sensitive subject area and I arguably may
have butted in farther than appropriate, I'll now butt out. But I hope
someone else reads the thread and, if the girl and her story are real,
gets her some help.


Since you're so local to her, and you came across this first, why don't
*you* call the school and get her "some help"? Noooo, you posted it all
over USENET. If you were so concerned it would have never come here.


  #9  
Old October 2nd 04, 03:42 PM
Sarah Vaughan
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

In message
, UB-1983
writes
Last week, I found my teenager reading with some curiosity
http://sweetval.blogspot.com

It's a blog, fairly well-written, supposedly by a girl named Valerie who
lives in Wells, NY, a very small town in the Adirondack region of NY.
The blog details the purported sexual awakening of the girl who
supposedly writes it.

In about ten days, she's managed to lose her virginity, have oral and
anal sex with multiple boys, then discover she's a lesbian and have
relationships with two different girls. It's even illustrated with
photos showing two different girls performing oral sex on boys, and of
someone stripping in a poker game.

The girl gives enough information about herself that, if true, would
make her easy to identify, including her yahoo messaging ID.

I wasn't particularly upset with my teenager reading the blog; a link to
it had come in on IM, and any teen would be curious. We talked about it.

But my question is, either the writer of this blog is a sick
pornographer (if the stuff in it is made up), or is really, really
crying out for help. To be that sexually active and promiscuous at 15,
AND put full details and identifying information and photos on the web
for all to see DOES seem like she'd benefit from some counseling, right?
So should I call her school (it's Wells High School, 518-924-6000, if
the information she provides is true) and report her so she can get
help? Or should I leave well enough alone?


Having checked it out, I would be extremely surprised if this was a
genuine teenage blog. It doesn't read like the writings of a teenager,
even a randy teenager, discovering sex - it reads like the writings of a
porn author deliberately trying to titillate.

However, that doesn't eliminate the possibility that there may be a
genuine teenager out there fitting the personal details given, either by
coincidence or because it's someone's idea of a sick joke/a turn-on to
make up this kind of stuff about a real person. I'd definitely
recommend contacting the school in question just to exclude this
possibility. If there's a real Valerie fitting this description but not
posting this stuff, somebody should know about this and get the journal
taken off-site, if such a thing is possible.

Incidentally, if it was for real, I don't think you could assume from
that that the girl needed counselling (though she may well need advice
about safe sex and handling tricky situations). Enjoying sex and
feeling comfortable enough with it to try out a lot of different kinds
of it and discuss it publically may not be sensible, but it isn't
automatically pathological.


All the best,

Sarah


--
"I once requested an urgent admission for a homeopath who had become depressed
and taken a massive underdose" - Phil Peverley
 




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