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more birthday ettiquete questions



 
 
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  #1  
Old March 30th 06, 06:49 PM posted to misc.kids
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DS's b-day is coming up in June. I'm thinking ahead. His preschool is
different from others I know. He starts the day in one room with the entire
preschool, they go to their regular classes, they take naps in the nap room
and end the day with the afternoon staff, sometimes mixed with all the kids
from the different classes, depending on how many are taking naps that day.

DS's main class varies day by day. Some kids are there full time and some
are part-time, but it's not Mon/Wed/Fri, it's whatever day the parents
choose based on availability and need. Some kids nap, some don't.

DS is full-time, so he sees all the kids. If I invite everyone from his
class, that would be about 22 students. He has friends from the other
class, and we can't invite two classrooms full of kids over. So, I'd like
him to choose which friends to invite, since he seems to know who he wants
over.

The problem is that drop-off and pick-up is so varied that I can't wait
around outside everyday waiting for each child's parent to come. I don't
want DS handing out invitations in class, since DS didn't even know he had
an invitation when he got it and nearly didn't give it to me, and I don't
want kids who don't get one to feel left out.

There is a sign-in log for the parents that the teachers and administrator
leaves notes in for the parents. They clip the notes with each child's log.
I was thinking of clipping the invitations there. I'm not sure if that's
okay or if it would be considered rude by the parents of kids who are not
invited. The invitations will be in plain envelopes, but I think the
parents will know they are invitations. Besides, I think DS will want to
write out his friends' names on the envelopes. Please let me know before I
ask the school if this method of distribution is okay.


  #2  
Old March 30th 06, 06:55 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions


"toypup" wrote in message
. com...
DS's b-day is coming up in June. I'm thinking ahead. His preschool is
different from others I know. He starts the day in one room with the
entire preschool, they go to their regular classes, they take naps in the
nap room and end the day with the afternoon staff, sometimes mixed with
all the kids from the different classes, depending on how many are taking
naps that day.

DS's main class varies day by day. Some kids are there full time and some
are part-time, but it's not Mon/Wed/Fri, it's whatever day the parents
choose based on availability and need. Some kids nap, some don't.

DS is full-time, so he sees all the kids. If I invite everyone from his
class, that would be about 22 students. He has friends from the other
class, and we can't invite two classrooms full of kids over. So, I'd like
him to choose which friends to invite, since he seems to know who he wants
over.

The problem is that drop-off and pick-up is so varied that I can't wait
around outside everyday waiting for each child's parent to come. I don't
want DS handing out invitations in class, since DS didn't even know he had
an invitation when he got it and nearly didn't give it to me, and I don't
want kids who don't get one to feel left out.

There is a sign-in log for the parents that the teachers and administrator
leaves notes in for the parents. They clip the notes with each child's
log. I was thinking of clipping the invitations there. I'm not sure if
that's okay or if it would be considered rude by the parents of kids who
are not invited. The invitations will be in plain envelopes, but I think
the parents will know they are invitations. Besides, I think DS will want
to write out his friends' names on the envelopes. Please let me know
before I ask the school if this method of distribution is okay.

Could you ask the teachers what they usually do?
I'm assuming that the logs are separate for each child and you wouldn't just
be leaving a pile for them to look through? I think it sounds fine. If
they're in plain envelopes then the children probably won't realise that
they're invitations so the children won't feel left out.
I don't really see that parents could feel that it was rude. I'm sure there
are times when there are letters for one proportion of the pre-school and
not for the other, and would they feel insulted if they didn't get an admin
letter that was irrelevent to them? If you just clip them there then they
won't know who it's from unless they get one, so they can't feel hard done
by really.
Debbie


  #3  
Old March 30th 06, 07:15 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions

At ds' pre-school, all the kids have cubbies for their extra stuff.
That's where people generally leave invites/thank you notes, etc. Does
yours have something similar?

  #4  
Old March 30th 06, 08:47 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions


"toypup" wrote in message
. com...
write out his friends' names on the envelopes. Please let me know before
I ask the school if this method of distribution is okay.


I'm sure the sure has dealt with this issue many times
before. Ask them what they want you to do.

Bizby


  #5  
Old March 30th 06, 08:49 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions


"Irene" wrote in message
oups.com...
At ds' pre-school, all the kids have cubbies for their extra stuff.
That's where people generally leave invites/thank you notes, etc. Does
yours have something similar?


Yes, but I'd have missed it if DS got one that way.


  #6  
Old March 30th 06, 08:56 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions


"Welches" wrote in message
...

Could you ask the teachers what they usually do?
I'm assuming that the logs are separate for each child and you wouldn't
just be leaving a pile for them to look through? I think it sounds fine.
If they're in plain envelopes then the children probably won't realise
that they're invitations so the children won't feel left out.
I don't really see that parents could feel that it was rude. I'm sure
there are times when there are letters for one proportion of the
pre-school and not for the other, and would they feel insulted if they
didn't get an admin letter that was irrelevent to them? If you just clip
them there then they won't know who it's from unless they get one, so they
can't feel hard done by really.
Debbie


Yes, but it's a rather new school and DS has only been invited to one
birthday in the year he's been there. (It's been open just as long.) The
child in that case handed DS the invitation in the classroom and DS nearly
didn't give it to me. I would assume parents would know what they are by
the shape of the envelope and the fact that the handwriting of each child's
name will be in child scrawl. Most notices are sheets of paper or envelopes
with adult handwriting of the name of the parent. They won't be in a pile,
but as we flip through each page to get to our child's we see the notices
attached to the sheets. Most birthdays there seem to be celebrated by
bringing birthday cakes to the classroom, but we'd like to invite the kids
over so we can meet the parents.

Personally, I would not be offended if my child were not invited to a
birthday party that did not include the entire class, but some people you
never know. I'd hate to be commiting a major faux pas.


  #7  
Old March 30th 06, 09:10 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions


Hello,

The problem is that drop-off and pick-up is so varied that I can't wait
around outside everyday waiting for each child's parent to come. I don't
want DS handing out invitations in class, since DS didn't even know he had
an invitation when he got it and nearly didn't give it to me, and I don't
want kids who don't get one to feel left out.


I may be harsh, but if I know I can only invite a certain number of
children and my son chooses who to invite I just get on with it. Of
course, I've guided him at times when needed, but generally I don't get
in a twist about missing children out.
Parents should understand. If your son get pally with someone he didn't
invite, or misses someone out then you'll be able to invite them over
to play.

As for the practicalities, some day cares are happy to distribute
invitations for parents, others have a blanket no (which is
understandable). In the latter case, I'm sure they'll be able to show
you where each child keeps their bag and you can pop the envelope in
there.

Mary Ann

  #8  
Old March 30th 06, 09:19 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions


"bizby40" wrote in message
...

"toypup" wrote in message
. com...
write out his friends' names on the envelopes. Please let me know before
I ask the school if this method of distribution is okay.


I'm sure the sure has dealt with this issue many times
before. Ask them what they want you to do.


Oops, that should of course read, "I'm sure the *school*
has dealt with this issue many times before.

Bizby


  #9  
Old March 30th 06, 09:24 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions

toypup wrote:

There is a sign-in log for the parents that the teachers and administrator
leaves notes in for the parents. They clip the notes with each child's log.
I was thinking of clipping the invitations there. I'm not sure if that's
okay or if it would be considered rude by the parents of kids who are not
invited. The invitations will be in plain envelopes, but I think the
parents will know they are invitations. Besides, I think DS will want to
write out his friends' names on the envelopes. Please let me know before I
ask the school if this method of distribution is okay.


You need to ask the school. This is more of a logistics
issue than an etiquette one, so there isn't an across-the-board
answer. I suspect the school will be fine with it, but I
wouldn't risk putting anything on the clip without getting
permission first.

Best wishes,
Ericka
  #10  
Old March 30th 06, 11:41 PM posted to misc.kids
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Default more birthday ettiquete questions


toypup wrote:
"Irene" wrote in message
oups.com...
At ds' pre-school, all the kids have cubbies for their extra stuff.
That's where people generally leave invites/thank you notes, etc. Does
yours have something similar?


Yes, but I'd have missed it if DS got one that way.


Y'know, the times ds has gotten invites that way, the teacher made sure
to mention it to me, so I'd be sure not to miss it.

Irene

 




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