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I miss being pregnant...



 
 
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  #1  
Old September 27th 03, 09:02 AM
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Default I miss being pregnant...

I had a troublesome pregnancy due to my 'advanced maternal age' of 41
& spent the last several months of my pregnancy on full bedrest. In
the end, I delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy 3 1/2 months ago.

Here is the weird part...

Even with the difficulites of my pregnancy, I miss being pregnant so
much that I cried for the first few weeks post partum. I still think
back at how calm and happy I was when I was pregnant & I want to 'go
back' to that time again.

During those last months of bedrest, it was the first time in my
entire life that every moment of the day was spent literally resting,
relaxing and lounging. For the first time I had no worries, no
housecleaning, cooking etc. Nothing was expected of me except to grow
a healthy baby.

I read all the books I never had time for, I watched all the TV shows
that my heart desired, I knitted clothes for baby and I answered the
phone only when I felt like talking. I was waited on hand and foot &
everyone was careful not to upset or stress me out. I never felt so
relaxed, happy and calm in my life.

Then the baby came and Oh My GOD, reality hit so hard that it threw me
for a loop. I'm back to my Type A self again, short tempered, short
of sleep, impatient, anxious, bitchy, blood pressure soaring after
being perfect for 9 months. Now that I have something to compare to -
I realize the 'real' me needs to change.

I love my baby so much and I want to be the person I was during
pregnancy. I tried drugs (Paxil) but that didnt' do anything to calm
me. One doctor suggested I may be lacking progesterone which tends to
be calming, while another suggests cognitive therapy. Anyone care to
throw in there 2 cents?


Bree


  #2  
Old September 27th 03, 09:23 AM
pcb
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Posts: n/a
Default I miss being pregnant...

wrote:

I had a troublesome pregnancy due to my 'advanced maternal age' of 41
& spent the last several months of my pregnancy on full bedrest. In
the end, I delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy 3 1/2 months ago.

Here is the weird part...

Even with the difficulites of my pregnancy, I miss being pregnant so
much that I cried for the first few weeks post partum. I still think
back at how calm and happy I was when I was pregnant & I want to 'go
back' to that time again.

During those last months of bedrest, it was the first time in my
entire life that every moment of the day was spent literally resting,
relaxing and lounging. For the first time I had no worries, no
housecleaning, cooking etc. Nothing was expected of me except to grow
a healthy baby.

I read all the books I never had time for, I watched all the TV shows
that my heart desired, I knitted clothes for baby and I answered the
phone only when I felt like talking. I was waited on hand and foot &
everyone was careful not to upset or stress me out. I never felt so
relaxed, happy and calm in my life.

Then the baby came and Oh My GOD, reality hit so hard that it threw me
for a loop. I'm back to my Type A self again, short tempered, short
of sleep, impatient, anxious, bitchy, blood pressure soaring after
being perfect for 9 months. Now that I have something to compare to -
I realize the 'real' me needs to change.

I love my baby so much and I want to be the person I was during
pregnancy. I tried drugs (Paxil) but that didnt' do anything to calm
me. One doctor suggested I may be lacking progesterone which tends to
be calming, while another suggests cognitive therapy. Anyone care to
throw in there 2 cents?


Bree


How about trying meditation or yoga? Actually, I find it difficult to
relax during a yoga class, but maybe it'll work for you.

pcb

  #3  
Old September 27th 03, 10:47 AM
Dagny
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Posts: n/a
Default I miss being pregnant...

wrote in message ...
I had a troublesome pregnancy due to my 'advanced maternal age' of 41
& spent the last several months of my pregnancy on full bedrest. In
the end, I delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy 3 1/2 months ago.

Here is the weird part...

Even with the difficulites of my pregnancy, I miss being pregnant so
much that I cried for the first few weeks post partum. I still think
back at how calm and happy I was when I was pregnant & I want to 'go
back' to that time again.

During those last months of bedrest, it was the first time in my
entire life that every moment of the day was spent literally resting,
relaxing and lounging. For the first time I had no worries, no
housecleaning, cooking etc. Nothing was expected of me except to grow
a healthy baby.

I read all the books I never had time for, I watched all the TV shows
that my heart desired, I knitted clothes for baby and I answered the
phone only when I felt like talking. I was waited on hand and foot &
everyone was careful not to upset or stress me out. I never felt so
relaxed, happy and calm in my life.

Then the baby came and Oh My GOD, reality hit so hard that it threw me
for a loop. I'm back to my Type A self again, short tempered, short
of sleep, impatient, anxious, bitchy, blood pressure soaring after
being perfect for 9 months. Now that I have something to compare to -
I realize the 'real' me needs to change.

I love my baby so much and I want to be the person I was during
pregnancy. I tried drugs (Paxil) but that didnt' do anything to calm
me. One doctor suggested I may be lacking progesterone which tends to
be calming, while another suggests cognitive therapy. Anyone care to
throw in there 2 cents?


Bree


No but it does sound like I would feel the same way -- it sounds like you
had the first real vacation of your life and what a long one! And then you
got thrown back into the fire.

Try the progesterone? You can get natural progesterone in a cream. I saw a
doctor once who said it's like valium. I think he was overdramatizing.

-- Dagny
EDD 10/6/03


  #4  
Old September 27th 03, 12:54 PM
Sophie
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Posts: n/a
Default I miss being pregnant...

wrote in message ...
I had a troublesome pregnancy due to my 'advanced maternal age' of 41
& spent the last several months of my pregnancy on full bedrest. In
the end, I delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy 3 1/2 months ago.

Here is the weird part...

Even with the difficulites of my pregnancy, I miss being pregnant so
much that I cried for the first few weeks post partum. I still think
back at how calm and happy I was when I was pregnant & I want to 'go
back' to that time again.

During those last months of bedrest, it was the first time in my
entire life that every moment of the day was spent literally resting,
relaxing and lounging. For the first time I had no worries, no
housecleaning, cooking etc. Nothing was expected of me except to grow
a healthy baby.

I read all the books I never had time for, I watched all the TV shows
that my heart desired, I knitted clothes for baby and I answered the
phone only when I felt like talking. I was waited on hand and foot &
everyone was careful not to upset or stress me out. I never felt so
relaxed, happy and calm in my life.

Then the baby came and Oh My GOD, reality hit so hard that it threw me
for a loop. I'm back to my Type A self again, short tempered, short
of sleep, impatient, anxious, bitchy, blood pressure soaring after
being perfect for 9 months. Now that I have something to compare to -
I realize the 'real' me needs to change.

I love my baby so much and I want to be the person I was during
pregnancy. I tried drugs (Paxil) but that didnt' do anything to calm
me. One doctor suggested I may be lacking progesterone which tends to
be calming, while another suggests cognitive therapy. Anyone care to
throw in there 2 cents?


Bree



A baby is way easier to care for when it's still inside IMO. No wonder you
want to go back to that. You weren't getting up a gazillion times in the
night, no crying baby, no diapers, etc...A lot of women even swear they
still feel the baby moving inside after it's born. Pregnancy is a weird
thing.

Maybe you need something different from Paxil (I have no idea what but
trying other drugs might help).

Honestly it sounds pretty normal to me, if that helps.

--
Sophie -
TTC #4


  #5  
Old September 27th 03, 02:18 PM
zeldabee
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Posts: n/a
Default I miss being pregnant...

wrote:
I had a troublesome pregnancy due to my 'advanced maternal age' of 41
& spent the last several months of my pregnancy on full bedrest. In
the end, I delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy 3 1/2 months ago.


Wow...I just had my baby not quite 3 weeks ago, and I'm 40...I had a normal
pregnancy, though.

Here is the weird part...

Even with the difficulites of my pregnancy, I miss being pregnant so
much that I cried for the first few weeks post partum. I still think
back at how calm and happy I was when I was pregnant & I want to 'go
back' to that time again.


I've been crying, too, but I'm so relieved not to be pregnant anymore! I
blame my weepiness on the hormone crash, as well as a natural tendency
toward depression on my part. I was miserable during pregnancy, especially
toward the end.

During those last months of bedrest, it was the first time in my
entire life that every moment of the day was spent literally resting,
relaxing and lounging. For the first time I had no worries, no
housecleaning, cooking etc. Nothing was expected of me except to grow
a healthy baby.

I read all the books I never had time for, I watched all the TV shows
that my heart desired, I knitted clothes for baby and I answered the
phone only when I felt like talking. I was waited on hand and foot &
everyone was careful not to upset or stress me out. I never felt so
relaxed, happy and calm in my life.


That sounds nice. I remember being so scared that I'd be put on bedrest for
some reason or other, because it would have been financially catastrophic
for me. As it was, I worked full-time up until I went into labor (or, I
can't really say that--until my water broke and I had to be induced,
anyway).

Then the baby came and Oh My GOD, reality hit so hard that it threw me
for a loop.


That I can relate to completely! What a shock...really, nothing could have
prepared me for it. All that stuff people love to tell pregnant women about
how life will never be the same, you won't know what hit you, etc.... It
turns out that they weren't exaggerating.

I'm back to my Type A self again, short tempered, short
of sleep, impatient, anxious, bitchy, blood pressure soaring after
being perfect for 9 months. Now that I have something to compare to -
I realize the 'real' me needs to change.


I'm really hoping I can adjust--I think the 'real' me can eventually handle
being a mother--I just have to figure out how to do it, and how to
integrate it into my life.

I love my baby so much and I want to be the person I was during
pregnancy. I tried drugs (Paxil) but that didnt' do anything to calm
me. One doctor suggested I may be lacking progesterone which tends to
be calming, while another suggests cognitive therapy. Anyone care to
throw in there 2 cents?


I'm going to see a doc next week. I'm already in therapy, and I'm thinking
I'm going to try an antidepressant. (I've never heard about the
progesterone thing.)

It sounds like you had a lot of help during your pregnancy--do you have any
help now? That's one thing that pops into mind. Good luck to you, anyway.

--
z e l d a b e e @ p a n i x . c o m
http://NewsReader.Com/
  #6  
Old September 27th 03, 02:48 PM
Jayne Kulikauskas
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Posts: n/a
Default I miss being pregnant...


wrote in message ...

[]
I love my baby so much and I want to be the person I was during
pregnancy. I tried drugs (Paxil) but that didnt' do anything to calm
me. One doctor suggested I may be lacking progesterone which tends to
be calming, while another suggests cognitive therapy. Anyone care to
throw in there 2 cents?


If your baby is not sleeping through the night (and maybe even if he is) you
are probably suffering from sleep deprivation. Most people in developed
countries do not get enough sleep. That can have a profound impact on your
mood. Also, if you have a typical diet, you are eating far more sugar and
other high-glycemic carbohydrates than are good for you. This affects your
mood, your energy level, your horomones and just about everything to do with
your general health. People who change their sleep patterns and diet often
experience dramatic changes without the use of drugs. This would be the
first option that I would explore before trying any medications.

Jayne


  #7  
Old September 27th 03, 10:07 PM
CY
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Posts: n/a
Default I miss being pregnant...

Oops I changed the reply header by accident...

Sounds like ppd to me and another medication will probably make all the
difference. I had depression for years (not pg related however) and I tried
about 6 different meds before I found one that did the trick for me. You
might also try to get a referrral to a psychiatrist who specializes in Post
Partum Depression.

Anf fwiw, we all like to be pampered. It's not surprising that you miss
that and it's probably the attention you are missing rather than actually
being pg.The first few months of motherhood are a difficult time for Type
A's because it's such a time of control-lessness (if thats a word!) and
after being in the spotlight for so many months, it's probably quite an
adjustment to feel usurped by this tiny baby who requires ALL OF YOU!

Many women go through this but there is help available - just trying one med
is only a start. Paxil does NOTHING for me so you may have to go through
quite a selection until you find the right fit. If you're nursing there's a
lot of options available so don't let that deter you.

Good luck and this time will pass so soon, so try to enjoy it the best you
can...

wrote in message ...
I had a troublesome pregnancy due to my 'advanced maternal age' of 41
& spent the last several months of my pregnancy on full bedrest. In
the end, I delivered a perfectly healthy baby boy 3 1/2 months ago.

Here is the weird part...

Even with the difficulites of my pregnancy, I miss being pregnant so
much that I cried for the first few weeks post partum. I still think
back at how calm and happy I was when I was pregnant & I want to 'go
back' to that time again.

During those last months of bedrest, it was the first time in my
entire life that every moment of the day was spent literally resting,
relaxing and lounging. For the first time I had no worries, no
housecleaning, cooking etc. Nothing was expected of me except to grow
a healthy baby.

I read all the books I never had time for, I watched all the TV shows
that my heart desired, I knitted clothes for baby and I answered the
phone only when I felt like talking. I was waited on hand and foot &
everyone was careful not to upset or stress me out. I never felt so
relaxed, happy and calm in my life.

Then the baby came and Oh My GOD, reality hit so hard that it threw me
for a loop. I'm back to my Type A self again, short tempered, short
of sleep, impatient, anxious, bitchy, blood pressure soaring after
being perfect for 9 months. Now that I have something to compare to -
I realize the 'real' me needs to change.

I love my baby so much and I want to be the person I was during
pregnancy. I tried drugs (Paxil) but that didnt' do anything to calm
me. One doctor suggested I may be lacking progesterone which tends to
be calming, while another suggests cognitive therapy. Anyone care to
throw in there 2 cents?


Bree




  #8  
Old September 29th 03, 05:57 PM
Ilse Witch
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Posts: n/a
Default I miss being pregnant...

wrote:

Even with the difficulites of my pregnancy, I miss being pregnant so
much that I cried for the first few weeks post partum. I still think
back at how calm and happy I was when I was pregnant & I want to 'go
back' to that time again.


I had a strong sense of grief for months after delivery, I missed
being pregnant so much. I dearly love DS, and it was never a question
of being depressed either, it was just the enormous change that came
with delivery. From one day to the next your life is ruled by a tiny
little human being, which is very demanding.

What helped for me was to find time for myself. I needed a long
recovery from the delivery (4 weeks before I even left the house).
I tried to spend at least 30 minutes each day just for me. Usually
when DH came home from work and took DS for a diaper change and a
bath, or just after the evening feeding, when DS was asleep.

The hardest thing is that there is very little routine those first
months. Nevertheless, you can try to structure your life more. Pay
close attention to when your baby feeds, some feedings will always
be around the same time. Then schedule some "off-time" for yourself
right after that, when the baby is asleep. Put him in a carrier or
a sling and go for a walk, or do some reading. If you find you need
more mental balance, you may consider meditation or yoga.

HTH!!

--
-- I
mommy to DS (14m)
guardian of DH
EDD 05-17-2004
War doesn't decide who's right - only who's left

 




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