Mommys groups

Are those Mommy's groups, and stay at home Mom's clubs etc usually such
pains in the butt to deal with? I have contacted 2 in my area to join - I
live on the edge of a county and all my daughter's pediatricians, her park
that she loves to go (which is just 5 minutes from our home or so) is all
related to one branch of the local Mommy group- we *live* closest in
proximity to their homes and their places of activities- stores, parks, etc
that they meet at. It's just our zip code is not the same. 2 Mommy groups
have turned me down because I don't live in their area, which is a crock
because I DO. If I join the group where my zip code is mapped their
activities are much further away, twice as far.

Grrrrrrrrr! I mean, really. That's a crock of an excuse. They can (and
should) do a background check if they want to, or meet me in person, but
turning my down sight unseen from a stay at home mom's group that regulary
does things mere 5-10 minutes from my home because of my physical address is
a crock of ****. In fact, I see one group at the park all the time and it
was at this park when I asked them that they told me I cannot join. They
were talking it up and talking with me all friendly then when they asked me
where I live, pfffft. Nope.

I'd start my own, if I knew people, that's why I want to join. I just don't
want to have to drive twice as far as the one closest to me.

"beyond the pale" wrote in message
...
Are those Mommy's groups, and stay at home Mom's clubs etc usually such
pains in the butt to deal with? I have contacted 2 in my area to join - I
live on the edge of a county and all my daughter's pediatricians, her park
that she loves to go (which is just 5 minutes from our home or so) is all
related to one branch of the local Mommy group- we *live* closest in
proximity to their homes and their places of activities- stores, parks,
etc that they meet at. It's just our zip code is not the same. 2 Mommy
groups have turned me down because I don't live in their area, which is a
crock because I DO. If I join the group where my zip code is mapped their
activities are much further away, twice as far.

Grrrrrrrrr! I mean, really. That's a crock of an excuse. They can (and
should) do a background check if they want to, or meet me in person, but
turning my down sight unseen from a stay at home mom's group that regulary
does things mere 5-10 minutes from my home because of my physical address
is a crock of ****. In fact, I see one group at the park all the time and
it was at this park when I asked them that they told me I cannot join.
They were talking it up and talking with me all friendly then when they
asked me where I live, pfffft. Nope.

I'd start my own, if I knew people, that's why I want to join. I just
don't want to have to drive twice as far as the one closest to me.


Here is a copy and paste from their email: No kidding:

"We regret to inform you that your application has been denied because you
live too far outside of the area to be a part of this group."

Meanwhile they are perhaps picnicking at the park that's 5 minutes away.
It's not even a different county, just my postal address says a different
town.

Well, I wish them lots of fun and companionship.

Gosh, that's really sad. Wht don't you try starting your own? If you
go to a church, you can start one there. If not, just post an
announcement somewhere in your neighborhood like the grocery store or
the library--or you could run a little announcement in a neighborhood
paper or alternative paper if there is in one where you live.

Leslie

beyond the pale wrote:
Are those Mommy's groups, and stay at home Mom's clubs etc usually such
pains in the butt to deal with?

Yes.

I am way too old to have ever been involved, but an online group I read
has lots of women all over the country who belong and every one is
frazzled dealing with the unnecessary bureaucracy and rules involved.

If they won't listen to your explanation about living close to that
group, I'm afraid you are out of luck. They don't often back down.

Yep, what a bunch of b*ll.

gloria p

"Puester" wrote in message
...
beyond the pale wrote:
Are those Mommy's groups, and stay at home Mom's clubs etc usually such
pains in the butt to deal with?

Yes.

I am way too old to have ever been involved, but an online group I read
has lots of women all over the country who belong and every one is
frazzled dealing with the unnecessary bureaucracy and rules involved.

If they won't listen to your explanation about living close to that group,
I'm afraid you are out of luck. They don't often back down.

Yep, what a bunch of b*ll.

gloria p

Really??? This is news to me. I mean, they all advertise themselves as a
good network of friends for mothers, supportive, and all that. But that's
what struck me when I observed the group having the get-together on the
playground, there was actually one person who was standing at the gazebo
supervising things, not involved but just seemed to be running things. I
approached her with questions and she menttioned right away that the members
pay dues in order to belong, almost as if she was making it clear that the
kids would not be allowed to play with kids on the playground that don't
"belong".

Very odd- I mean, obviously, if dues are involved, you pay them for the
benefit of participating, but they didn't seem to be that friendly. And if
they are that nitpicky about memebers it does seem to be bull. I'd be much
more understanding if they insist on background checks, like I said, but
what's the point of excluding based on an address, if you're local?? The
group that excluded me today is a FREE group, no dues, and I wanted to join
mainly to have access to their online forums so we can discuss local things,
but also, I would like to attend park play dates. I bet you money that there
are quite a few members whose kids see my daughter's pediatrician- he is
excellent. Now if I lived too far away would I possibly have DD be a patient
of his?? It's quite weird. Another funny thing, this is a large metro area,
and they accept an entire county. I am sure I live closer in proximity to
MANY of the members, than some of the other members do. I live 10 minutes
down the road potentially to members in the area I am interested in, those
who live in the South side of the county live 30 minutes away.

The national group, MOMS Club or whatever, will take me of course but only
the branch that "accepts my zip code" not the one that's right next door

I contacted a mums group, part of the national group whatever that is, and
they wanted me to pay the dues before providing a list of activities, so I
had no idea if there was anything I'd want to participate in before joining!

Anne

beyond the pale wrote:

The national group, MOMS Club or whatever, will take me of course but only
the branch that "accepts my zip code" not the one that's right next door

I'll bet you dollars to doughnuts that those rules have
to do with making sure one chapter doesn't poach another chapter's
territory.
While national groups like the MOMS Club and similar
organization may be easier to find and more well advertised
in your area, often the most successful groups are those that
come out of some sort of shared experiences--neighborhood
groups, parents' groups for a preschool, groups from birthing
classes, etc. You don't have to start with a huge group if
you want to make your own. Just fine one other mom and make
a weekly date to do something with the kids. It helps grow
the group if at least one of you is a bit outgoing ;-)

Best wishes,
Ericka

"beyond the pale" wrote in message
...
Are those Mommy's groups, and stay at home Mom's clubs etc usually such
pains in the butt to deal with? I have contacted 2 in my area to join - I
live on the edge of a county and all my daughter's pediatricians, her park
that she loves to go (which is just 5 minutes from our home or so) is all
related to one branch of the local Mommy group- we *live* closest in
proximity to their homes and their places of activities- stores, parks,
etc that they meet at. It's just our zip code is not the same. 2 Mommy
groups have turned me down because I don't live in their area, which is a
crock because I DO. If I join the group where my zip code is mapped their
activities are much further away, twice as far.

Grrrrrrrrr! I mean, really. That's a crock of an excuse. They can (and
should) do a background check if they want to, or meet me in person, but
turning my down sight unseen from a stay at home mom's group that regulary
does things mere 5-10 minutes from my home because of my physical address
is a crock of ****. In fact, I see one group at the park all the time and
it was at this park when I asked them that they told me I cannot join.
They were talking it up and talking with me all friendly then when they
asked me where I live, pfffft. Nope.

I'd start my own, if I knew people, that's why I want to join. I just
don't want to have to drive twice as far as the one closest to me.

Do you have a meetup.com group in your area?
Lots of those are free to join, some charge a yearly fee of about 5-10$ or
something. Some will allow you to give the group a "test drive" for a month
or so before you are required to pay your dues. Some ask for donations but
do not require them.
I am a member of a few mom's meetup groups right in my city. I like it
because there's a message board as well as a monthly calendar of different
events. Mainly, playdates and activities are in every area of the city
daily, or in a week, there's normally at least a couple events close to
home. Another bonus is that it's up to ME as to where I want to go - if I
am wanting and willing to travel to the other end of the city to meet some
other moms at a park, I can. If I don't want to, I don't have to. There's
always a fairly wide range of activities going on - there's mom and tot
events (parks, playdates, different types of activities, etc) as well as
things intended for families (like family swim day on a weekend, bbqs and
picnics that dads attend, etc) and also "mom's night outs" where little
ones stay with Daddy and Mom gets to get some time with the girls and
doesn't have to worry about the offspring.
I do like my meetup groups - I've definitely met quite a few friends myself,
as well as many for DS and the girls. I also do like the board, which
offers some support, tips, ideas, random things.
Maybe there's one in your area? It seems to be far less judgemental and
they don't tell you no because you live 'too far away'!

"Anne Rogers" wrote in message
. ..
I contacted a mums group, part of the national group whatever that is, and
they wanted me to pay the dues before providing a list of activities, so I
had no idea if there was anything I'd want to participate in before
joining!

Anne

Here they let you attend 2 activities before joining, the only stipulation
being obviously for safety reasons- you can't go to anything at someone's
house, but you can attend a meeting and a park date, and I believe meetups
at restaurants etc.

This is the group which I'd rather attend the closer one. So, I didn't try
it.

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote branch that "accepts my zip code"
not the one that's right next door

I'll bet you dollars to doughnuts that those rules have
to do with making sure one chapter doesn't poach another chapter's
territory.


Yes, that's exactly what they said. It doesn't make sense though- what do
they care which one I want to join?? Do they want the money? Is there some
benefit to having 71 members instead of 70? .......? I think both local
groups are large enough that it shouldn't seem to matter, but, it does for
some reason.