2nd Pregnancy Worries- weight, etc

For those who've had 2 pregnancies (or more), how was your 2nd pregnancy and
later ones compared to the first?

My first was ok...I had really bad morning sickness for months on end and
some other issues. I began that pregnancy weighing a little bit more than I
should and I always thought if I had not needed to lose 30 pounds before I
got pregnant to be at my ideal weight, that the pregnancy would have "felt"
better. I didn't worry about my weight though, I was more afraid of labor
pain. I lost weight in the first trimester, 15 pounds, and by the end of the
pregnancy I made that up plus five pounds, so it's almost like I was a
little overweight to start with and I only gained 5 pounds more than my
start weight. Weird. After that, I went back to work and I got down pretty
close to my ideal weight, and was relieved that everything fell back into
place. Then, I fell while on vacation and got a back injury, nothig serious
except it was bad enough that I stopped a lot of my normal routines such as
jogging and any kind of floor aerobic/exercise that involves abs and things
done while on my back (crunches, anything that presses your lower spine into
the floor).

Well, I became pretty stressed out and distressed and ended up finding that
within a year, I had gained weight up to what I weighed while pregnant, I
put the 30 pounds I lost back on. My weight has never yoyo'd but I was
pretty thin, then gained it when I started an office job with a long
commute- I gained it slowly over a few years. Then I became pregnant and
lost it unwillingly due to puking, then after the baby, got it down quickly
and kept it off until recently. If this makes sense...so long story short,
one of the only things wrong with first pregnancy was after losing weight
from vomiting, I gained most of the bbay weight in the last trimester and it
made me feel like I couldn't breathe- I literally felt ok enough until the
last month, then about 10 pounds hit like a freight train and I felt like
the baby was on my diaphragm all the time and was short of breath. The last
month was miserable and I had a terrible time sleeping, it just felt like
there was too much pressure in my torso.

I am not yet 6 weeks along this time around and this was a surprise
pregnancy, I was going to start a new workout&diet to lose 30 pounds
gradually until I found out. I am already feeling bloated and it seems like
it's happening much faster this time than with my first. A nurse told me a
lot of women have things a lot differeent with the 2nd pregnancy, some start
showing early. I do have one friend who showed in her first trimester of her
second pregnancy, but she was always rail thin except when pregnant-
extremely thin, maybe underweight. People tell me I don't look it but 30
pounds need to go. I'm not worried about the number, I am scared that this
time I might just gain continually. Hopefully I will not have morning
sickness, but I am worried about how it will feel to carry that much *more*
weight when the first time around was a low weight gain pregnancy and yet I
felt SO miserably uncomfrtable.

This is what's scary- I was that Tori Spelling reality show, where she and
her husband are buying an Inn to start a bed and breakfast. She looked about
to pop about 165 or so (fully pregnant), just looking at her reminded me of
how stuffed and miserable I felt in my last month. But with luck if I don't
ahve morning sickness this time, I can end up weighing a good but more than
that--it scares me because I felt so bad the first time, will I feel worse
phsyically this time??

I'm going to mention it to my doctor. I know I can't diet and have to gain
weight consistently, but I am struggling to try to make all my calories
"high quality" (no empty calories and junk food) and also have been walking
3-4 miles each day on the treadmill. I guess I am wondering if walking help
me to feel better without losing weight, because I didn't exercise during my
first pregnancy due to nausea. Was it carrying too much weight during the
pregnancy or was it lack of exercise/fitness that made me feel so bad? I
remember at the end sort of feeling like I couldn't take deep breaths- I did
carry low, front and center, and am short..I would love to avoid this
feeling this time around. I don't know what to expect. Is a 2nd pregnancy an
easier adjustment because your stomach has already been that big before?
etc. I don't remember much about my first except looking back it seemed to
pass quickly and not be that bad but at the time it felt like it was very
uncomfortable and lasted forever. I rememer at 6 weeks the nausea started, I
was bloated and then it felt like I deflated a bit and I didn't really show
until I was about 5-6 months along, and wasn't too huge until the last
month. This time I am worried, it really seems like I might not be as
nauseated but it feels like my stomach is going to show much MUCH sooner- if
this is true I worry that it's going to be a looong 9 months of a miserable
stomach.

I have promised myself that if we choose to have 1 more (we planned for a
3rd), I am NOT doing anything until I get back down to my feel-good weight.
Most of my friends have had good, easy pregnancies. My first one was one of
the worst of all of us just because of the constant nausea. 2 in my group
have had twins and they were induced early, and both of them say it wasn't
too bad. One of my friends gained a whopping 75 pounds while pregnant! She
says she wasn't too miserable- she was so tiny before so gaining 75 probably
made her top off at about 180 at most. It took her a while but by the time
her kid was 3 she had become very thin again.I can't really find anyone to
compare my situation to to judge ahead how I'm probably going to feel.
Another friend was always a good bit overweight to start with, and she also
describes her pregnancy as not being too uncomfortable. In my case my 1st
one was just culture shock or something- it was really difficult to rest and
I just felt I couldn't breathe and my stomach was so tight. Let me be fat,
but please don't let me be miserable this time, is what I say!!! I am so
scared I am going to feel like a bowling ball has been swallowed.

I really think you should not focus so much on weight!

Easy said, but the truth is, what you describe about the last month is very
classic last month stuff, often longer than that. Take me, my first baby was
IUGR, which means he didn't grow much in the last trimester, I started
pregnancy at normal weight for height and gained on the low side, about 17
pounds, I lost all but 4lb of that in delivery, yet I had all the feelings
you describe, when by your feelings about the cause, I shouldn't have, it's
the baby and the hormones that make you feel like that, it's even possible
that putting on more weight than I did, makes you whole frame bear the
weight of the baby better as some of the increased weight could be increased
muscle mass.

You'll do far better if you focus on being healthy, figure out some sort of
exercise program, if you can increase your lung function and efficiency,
then decreasing lung volume at the end isn't going to have such a dramatic
affect, similarly increasing strength is going to help your body carry the
baby more easily - I had difficult pregnancies from a musculoskeletal point
of view, and though the last 4 weeks of my 2nd pregnancy was horrendous,
upto week 32, in this area, it was a lot better and I put that down to
improved physical condition and I wasn't in bad condition the first time, I
just made sure I was in much better condition 2nd time.

With the diet, it really will make you feel better if you eat well, I know
when I was pregnant 2nd time and we were away from home for 4mths, sometimes
we'd eat out a lot, but after a few days I'd realise I needed decent food to
feel well and when I say decent I mean freshly prepared stuff, particularly
vegetables, things like steamed broccoli are fantastic. Also, if you do
stick to a good diet and still gain around 30 pounds, you'll know that's
just what you need to gain. I used to feel bad about my lowish weight gain
first time and blamed the IUGR on that, but my weight gain followed the
exact same pattern 2nd time, it just carried on where it had previously
stopped in the last month, I gained 3lb more, baby was 3lb more and I also
was left 4lb above baseline after delivery - that must just be the way my
body does pregnancy.

The truth is though, that 2nd pregnancies and subsequent ones often are
harder, you usually caring for a small child, you are older, you are looser
(it's the loose joints that tend to cause backaches and the like), you are
usually not so strong in the pelvic floor and abdomen (so start working on
that now!) and so on, but if you know there are things that weren't great
last time, you do have some time to fix it - the walking you are doing is
great, I'd add into that with some strengthening stuff, make sure you are
doing kegels 50+ times a day. Make sure you are drinking enough water too!

I've not read this myself, but others have recommended a book called "Eating
Expectantly", I don't recall the author, when this book has been mentioned,
the diet plan in "What to Expect when you are Expecting" is also usually
disrecommended.

Cheers

Anne

blue wrote:

It is common to show faster with later pregnancies.
You have got to stop worrying about the weight. Many women
start out pregnancies, planned or not, with more weight than
is ideal. While being very overweight or obese is associated
with some complications, it is unlikely that 30 pounds is
going to be an issue health-wise. Yes, you may feel
uncomfortable, but you could feel uncomfortable if you
started out underweight. Pregnancy isn't always a bed
of roses. The bottom line, though, is that it sounds
like you need to get this weight thing in perspective.
Would it have been best to get to your ideal weight before
getting pregnant? Sure. But the most important thing
now is to eat healthy and provide your baby what he or
she needs--which you clearly understand. Continuing
to move throughout your pregnancy should help, but for
some women, it's more about their body shape or other
issues than their weight per se, when it comes to how
uncomfortable they are. I'm short-waisted and there
just isn't much of anywhere for the baby to go, so
things are really squished in there and I get really
obnoxious heartburn. That's uncomfortable.
For my third pregnancy I had SPD. That was uncomfortable.
Pregnancies can be dramatically different in how
they feel. Your last pregnancy doesn't predict your next
one very well, so certainly someone else's first pregnancy
that might be similar to yours won't predict very well ;-)
We all just get to take whatever Mother Nature dishes out
in the way of pregnancies, and it's often a bit surprising.
Just think of it this way: If you're feeling ok now, then
that's one less day in this pregnancy that you might feel
bad...so enjoy it! If you feel bad today, then tomorrow
might be better...so be hopeful! I know that's a bit
Pollyanna, but that's the only way I know to get through
pregnancy.

Best wishes,
Ericka

On Apr 30, 1:26 am, "blue" wrote:
For those who've had 2 pregnancies (or more), how was your 2nd pregnancy and
later ones compared to the first?

I think what you felt with your first and what you might feel with
your second depend more on how the baby is positioned than on your
weight. For comparison, my first pregnancy I also had quite bad nausea/
vomiting for about the first half. I had no apetite and had trouble
gaining weight -- in the end I gained 12 lbs total. By the time I
delivered at 41 weeks I would say I still felt comfortable although
quite breathless. I am 5' 4" so not a lot of real estate in there. On
the other hand I never had that "baby pressing on my baldder need to
pee a thimble-full every half hour" feeling. I did have wicked bad
heartburn though. Baby was 8lbs 6 oz. and I lost all the weight and
more immediately. Breastfeeding helped tremendously with that in my
case, I couldn't stop the pounds coming off.

My second pregnancy I weighed about 20lbs less than when I started
pregnancy 1. Overall I would say I had the same amount of discomfort
with #2, but just a different kind. I still had morning sickness but
it wasn't as extreme or long-lasting. I had no heartburn but baby was
low and pressed on my bladder a lot. I also had more back pain but not
as much breathlessness. I gained 18lbs and gave birth last week - not
sure where I'm at now weight-wise. Baby was the same size as #1
though.

So all that to say you will gain what you gain and while there is
nothing wrong with eating well and getting some exercise don't forget
that alot of the weight is from fluid, blood etc and you can't control
that. Just because you are heavier this time around doesn't mean you
are destined to have a very uncomfortable pregnancy. If you get
yourself in that midset, it might become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Think positive!

Elle

"blue" wrote in message
news
For those who've had 2 pregnancies (or more), how was your 2nd pregnancy
and later ones compared to the first?

Everyone is uncomfortable in that last month. It doesn't matter how much
weight you do or don't gain or how big the baby is.

Don't spend two seconds worrying about your weight. Eat healthy food when
you are hungry. If you are never hungry, or feel slightly nausious, eat
small snacks through out the day. Be active but listen to your body. It
will tell you if you are doing to much.

To answer your question more specifically

PG #1 - I gained 55lbs, didn't show much until about 6mos, had SPD so that
was really miserable, felt uncomfrotable in the end. Shortness of breath,
hard to breath etc. Baby was 8lbs13oz.

PG #2 - I gained 60lbs, had worse morning sickness, got bigger earlier, NO
SPD!!, was very big in the end. Felt the same, probably a bit better
because no SPD. Baby was 8lbs9oz

PG #3 - I gained 65lbs even though I actually lost in the first trimester,
no SPD, had twins so I was enormous. It is still worth it in the end.
Babies were 8lbs7oz and 7lbs110z.

I actually remember the third pregnancy as being the best because I did not
have the SPD, I did not have a toddler, and I had help the last month so I
could take it very easy. I could barely move. I went shopping one day
and felt like a ran a marathon, lol.

Two other things 1) With my second pg I just didn't spend half as much time
thinking about it since I was busy with the first child. That is sort of a
blessing and 2) The deliveries got easier each time so that is a bonus!!

--
Nikki, mama to
Hunter 4/99
Luke 4/01
Brock 4/06
Ben 4/06

I actually remember the third pregnancy as being the best because I did
not have the SPD,

Nikki, you are a rare thing, I think I've only come across one other women
who has had SPD in one pregnancy and not in a subsequent pregnancy, so I
wanted to ask if there was anything you did different, or worked on between
pregnancies? There are multiple theories as to the cause of SPD, one is the
looseness of the joints, and that the SP either moves or separates, another
is misalignment, misalignments can be fixed, looseness takes an awful lot of
strength to have much impact on.

I've come across a few women where SPD has been significantly better, but
present in a 2nd pregnancy, I think that is the best most can realisitically
hope for, even myself, though it was very severe in the end, it was at a
manageable level for about 12 weeks before it was crippling.

Anne

blue wrote:

My first was ok...I had really bad morning sickness for months on end and
some other issues. I began that pregnancy weighing a little bit more than I
should and I always thought if I had not needed to lose 30 pounds before I
got pregnant to be at my ideal weight, that the pregnancy would have "felt"
better.

Pregnancy is not the glow and wonder that it's
been promised to be. The proverbial "they" tell
you that so that you'll get pregnant and it is
now your job to perpetuate that fantasy so that
other young ladies will get pregnant. ("Oh, I
loved being pregnant - I felt so glowing and the
joy of having life developing inside" blah blah
blah!)

Then I became pregnant and
lost it unwillingly due to puking, then after the baby, got it down quickly
and kept it off until recently. If this makes sense...so long story short,
one of the only things wrong with first pregnancy was after losing weight
from vomiting, I gained most of the bbay weight in the last trimester and it
made me feel like I couldn't breathe- I literally felt ok enough until the
last month, then about 10 pounds hit like a freight train and I felt like
the baby was on my diaphragm all the time and was short of breath. The last
month was miserable and I had a terrible time sleeping, it just felt like
there was too much pressure in my torso.

This is all normal. Sleep on your side, don't
sleep on your back. The first trimester sucked
because I always lost weight from nausea/vomiting.
The second trimester sucked because I was getting
big. The third trimester sucked because I couldn't
breathe, couldn't sleep, couldn't do anything.

I am not yet 6 weeks along this time around and this was a surprise
pregnancy, I was going to start a new workout&diet to lose 30 pounds
gradually until I found out. I am already feeling bloated and it seems like
it's happening much faster this time than with my first.

I showed around 5 months in the first pregnancy.
I showed the first week for the second.

I don't remember much about my first except looking back it seemed to
pass quickly and not be that bad but at the time it felt like it was very
uncomfortable and lasted forever.

That's nature's way of ensuring that you'll
have another pregnancy.

I have promised myself that if we choose to have 1 more (we planned for a
3rd), I am NOT doing anything until I get back down to my feel-good weight.
Most of my friends have had good, easy pregnancies.

Don't worry, you sound normal to me. All of
my friends had pregnancies that sucked. Our
favourite topics were about how much pregnancy
sucked, and yet most of us went on to have a
second or more.

-- Anita --

On Apr 30, 1:26?am, "blue" wrote:
For those who've had 2 pregnancies (or more), how was your 2nd pregnancy and
later ones compared to the first?

I was the lightest with my first pregnancy but also the most
miserable. From four months on I swelled up with water. By the end I
could only fit untied tennis shoes on my feet. I lost 27 lbs. in the
hospital. I gained 70 lbs. that time which means I weighed about 230
at the end.

I started heavier with #2 and gained the same, but did not have the
swelling and felt much better, though I probably weighed 250 at the
end. I got pregnant with #3 at 3 months post-partum, so I probably
weighed about 200 still. I couldn't figure out why I was getting
fatter again! I only gained 50 lbs. that time due to nursing. But
that time I had terrible sciatica and could hardly walk.

Almost six years later I got pregnant with #4. I quit looking at the
scale but I probably weighed 270 by the end. I was absolutely
miserable. I couldn't get comfortable in any position. I couldn't
sleep. I used to wake up in the middle of the night and wish it was
morning so I could just get up.

Three years later, iwht #5, it was a whole different story. I had
been regularly exercising (walking and lifting weights) because I was
trying to lose weight (did lost almost 60 lbs.) for my sister's
wedding. Although I probably weighed 260 or so by the end of the
pregnancy, I felt great the whole time except for the usual ending
stuff. I firmly believe that was because I was in good shape and what
I would recommend to you is that you keep up the exercise as long as
you can and eat healthy food. That extra 30 lbs. is nothing and every
pregnancy is different!

Leslie

Hey :-)

My thinking is: Screw the weight. It just doesn't matter. I don't even
have scales in my house anymore.

I don't think weight is really a good thing to consider during
pregnancy, you're going to gain some, no matter what you do. Of course,
eating fast food every day won't help, but eating healthy food, lots of
fruit and vegetables will make you feel better.
All I want lately is to barbecue. I want meat and I want potatoes and I
want salad with it and lots of dairy (and I'm lactose intollerant...
They don't make everything lactose free, but I don't care right now). I
want icecream but frozen fruit is fine! Doesn't mean I don't eat
icecream though ;-)

I'm pg with nr2. I'm at 23+6 today and I've started wearing maternity
clothes ages ago. With Sam I had one pair of maternity pants and two
dresses... This time I've already got 4 pairs of pants and lots of tops
because nothing I have fit anymore.
Also, this baby is driving me nuts! I have to go and pee three drops all
the time because the madam thinks stepping on my bladder is a fun game.
Also, she does all her excercising at night. So I'm not really getting
much sleep. I thik she dropped a little bit because I can at least
breathe again, then again my skin might have just finally stretched a
bit... I don't remember Sam ever being breech, but nr2 definitely is
spening a fair share of her time laying every which way she feels like.
I can feel her "kicking" at 4 spots, I don't know how she does it.

Over all I think I'm a bit more uncomfortable this time around, but this
year is a lot different from 2000, it's already been above 30°C and it's
over 20° every day right now. I don't think we were this "lucky" in
2000. I'm kind of dreading summer, but I guess I'll just spend my
afternoons at the pool and hope the temperatures don't raise above 35°
too often (yeah right).

So, I guess thee's a lot of factors playing into how we feel during
pregnancies and no real way to predict anything. The end result will
hopefully be a healthy happy baby though :-)

take care
nicole

"Anne Rogers" wrote in message
...
I actually remember the third pregnancy as being the best because I did
not have the SPD,

Nikki, you are a rare thing, I think I've only come across one other women
who has had SPD in one pregnancy and not in a subsequent pregnancy, so I
wanted to ask if there was anything you did different, or worked on
between pregnancies?

Maybe it wasn't true SPD?? I don't know. It hurt like hell from about
24wks on. I couldn't roll over, lift my legs, stairs hurt, getting out of
bed, in/out of the car etc. without lots of pain. Walking wasn't as bad so
I wasn't to limited. It was gone right after I delivered with no lasting
effects at all. Thank heavens. You've had *such* a struggle Anne, I
didn't do a thing different in the second two pregnancies - it just didn't
happen. I didn't realize that was so rare. I'm glad I didn't know or I
would have been stressed out about it.

--
Nikki, mama to
Hunter 4/99
Luke 4/01
Brock 4/06
Ben 4/06