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#1
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Laugh of the day
'Kate wrote in message ...
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...6756 343&rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? Good one that. Thanks 'Kate. -- Paul Griffiths |
#2
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Laugh of the day
'Kate wrote in message ... http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...6756 343&rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? 'Kate I saw it last week and the bid was up the 15K......looks like he still made out okay. |
#3
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Laugh of the day
LMFAO
This is too much. Lisa 'Kate wrote in message ... http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...m=4146756 343 &rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? 'Kate |
#4
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Laugh of the day
On Wed, 05 May 2004 14:10:56 -0500, 'Kate wrote:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...6756 343&rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? Okay, that, without question, has to be the funniest thing I've read in YEARS. I mean, I was literally in hysterics. I've now got enough endorphins to withstand major surgery for sixteen hours without feeling a thing. Thanks. [still laughing] Cele |
#5
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Headache Cure
'Kate wrote in message ...
On Thu, 06 May 2004 05:29:28 GMT, Cele On Wed, 05 May 2004 14:10:56 -0500, 'Kate wrote: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...tem=4146756 3 43&rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? Okay, that, without question, has to be the funniest thing I've read in YEARS. I mean, I was literally in hysterics. I've now got enough endorphins to withstand major surgery for sixteen hours without feeling a thing. Thanks. [still laughing] Cele I thought so too. I think we'll have to change truth is stranger than fiction into truth is funnier than fiction. 'Kate This isn't true, but it is still hysterical..... I wrote it one day at work when I had a headache. Feel free to distribute this anywhere. :-) DEALING WITH A MIGRAINE Stage One: You are aware of an odd sensation at the base of your neck. You drink a beer to help you feel "better". It doesn't work. Stage Two: It is joined by another odd sensation behind your eyeball. You drink another beer, figuring, Hey, beer is the Panacea for All of Man's Ill' s. That doesn't work either. Stage Three: You drink another beer, thinking maybe I didn't get enough beer. The two pains in your head become one and build into a definite uncomfortable feeling. Stage Four: You suddenly become aware of the fact that someone has put a red hot poker through your eyeball and it has exited at the base of your skull. Realizing that beer won't help you now, but it can't hurt, you get a few more beers. They don't help, but they can never hurt you. Beer is an Elemental Fluid, similar in composition to Mother's Milk, but with a kick. Stage Five: The feeling that a red hot poker has been passed through your head goes away, only to be replaced by the sensation of a sword passing completely through your head. You have some more beer, because finding the SOB that did this to you is gonna take some inner fortification. Beer is a real good fortifier. Stage Six: Just when you think it can't possibly get worse, it does. Your head feels like William "The Refrigerator" Perry is sitting on it, playing a game involving an ice-pick, and your brain. You look around but you see no one. That is because your vision is so clouded from seeing stars, and your hair has gone into muscle spasms that shut your eyes. You get another beer and resolve that homicide is definitely the way to go, someone is gonna =pay= for putting you through this misery. Stage Seven: Keeping your eyes open with cellophane tape long enough to load your gun, you are ready to find the ******* that caused all this. You drink another beer, washing down several of those hard narcotic pills the doctor gave you the last time this happened. They come in a bottle labeled "Do Not Drink Alcohol While Taking This Medication". Wisely, you decide to ignore the warning because you know they don't work unless you've got at least a six-pack of brewskis under your belt. Homicide is on your mind. You want to look good for the mug shots, so you brush your teeth and then drink another beer to get the toothpaste taste out of your mouth. Stage Eight: Gun in one hand, and a cold beer in the other, you set out to do a thorough search of your entire condo to find and destroy the miserable creature who has caused all this agony. Finding no one and all the doors locked and bolted, you realize you may have made a mistake in blaming someone else, say, the manager where you work. You drink another beer and take another of those big blue pills. Your brain is under so much pressure it is about to come squirting out of your ears. Suicide is the only way out now. Stage Nine: Holding your beer in one hand, and the gun in the other, you stand in front of a mirror, aim right between your eyes and fire. Unfortunately, you were aiming for a set of eyes that are a hallucination caused by your migraine and all the beer and drugs you've had in the last 20 minutes. Your shot does hit center in your brand new 35" color TV. Grabbing another cold beer, you assess the situation. Your head feels like elephants are tap-dancing on it, you need another beer and another big blue pill to calm your nerves and make up your mind what to do next. Suicide it is. You get back from the fridge and the medicine cabinet, and as you aim for your nose, you fire again. Stage Ten: Completely deafened by gunfire, you open your eyes only to discover you have missed the end of the nose you thought you were aiming at and your condo now features a nice neat .357 caliber hole in the ceiling. Suddenly, warm salt water begins flowing out of the hole and ****ing right on your head. You are completely bewildered by this and decide to have another beer. It keeps coming for 25 minutes, during which time you have several more beers. The tremendous banging sound inside your head is driving you insane. Stage Eleven: After drinking another beer to wash down the big blue pill you just took, you suddenly realize that the banging sound in your head is not actually inside your head. It is coming from your front door. You slither across the room in a drunken stumble and open the door, only to find that prissy little faggot who lives upstairs from you holding a bucket with a purple octopus in it, with a cop along for the ride. He starts babbling something about his $6,000 custom built sal****er aquarium being blown to bits and having 250 gallons of salt water on his floor ruining his expensive genuine silk oriental rugs. It is at that precise moment that you toss your cookies, getting equal amounts of puke in the bucket and on the cop's shoes. Stage Twelve: You wake up on a cot and find yourself staring at someone with SATAN tattooed on his forehead, and he's holding a large tub of Vaseline in his hands. Your headache is gone, but you have a 5 Star hangover. You begin quivering all over and crying for your Mommy! Your wife arrives with the bail money. Stage Thirteen: You resolve not to drink beer the next time you get a migraine because it just screws up your aim and does no good for a headache. |
#6
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Laugh of the day
'Kate wrote in message ... http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...6756 343&rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? 'Kate Holy ****..... I just got a chance to look at that. That is hilarious. And the dress went for 3,000???? Wow. Can't wait to see how many men try to sell wedding dresses like that to make a few bucks. T |
#7
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Laugh of the day
"Tiffany" wrote in message ... 'Kate wrote in message ... http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...m=4146756 343 &rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? 'Kate Holy ****..... I just got a chance to look at that. That is hilarious. And the dress went for 3,000???? Wow. Can't wait to see how many men try to sell wedding dresses like that to make a few bucks. If he didn't have a daughter to pass it on to, and wifey left it behind, well.... I'm just glad someone got something for it...... That is an awful lot to pay for a used wedding dress; $3850...... My late wife's dress is in my closet, it is 17 years old and my daughter is 7. Looks like it's gonna be there for awhile! |
#8
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Laugh of the day
'Kate wrote in message ...
On Wed, 5 May 2004 21:25:17 +0100, "Paul Griffiths" 'Kate wrote in message ... http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...em=4146756 34 3&rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? Good one that. Thanks 'Kate. You're quite welcome You think all the stuff about the 50,000 hits and proposals and radio interview or whatever is actually true? -- Paul Griffiths |
#9
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Laugh of the day
"Heywood Floyd" wrote in message
ink.net... My late wife's dress is in my closet, it is 17 years old and my daughter is 7. Looks like it's gonna be there for awhile! :-) My closet's got one too. Seems a shame it's not getting any use but I'm not sure about getting rid of it. Same is true of the rings. -- Paul Griffiths |
#10
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Laugh of the day
"Cele" wrote in message
news On Wed, 05 May 2004 14:10:56 -0500, 'Kate wrote: http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll...em=4146756 34 3&rd=1 This link is to a seriously funny ebay ad. Read it all... it's worth the look. Can anyone not relate to how this guy is feeling? I mean, I was literally in hysterics. I've now got enough endorphins to withstand major surgery for sixteen hours without feeling a thing. Don't tempt Fate, Cele, I'm pretty sure it reads this group. -- Paul Griffiths |
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