Letting toddlers put their hands all over glass display cases and windows while shopping...?

"Renee" wrote in message
...
When I'm out shopping with my 16 mos. old I generally try to keep him from
touching store windows and display cases by distracting him and telling
him
if necessary that someone just spent time cleaning that window and we
mustn't "undo" their hard work. When my husband saw me doing that today
however he said I was being neurotic and that I should let our toddler
touch
the windows and/or display cases if he wants to.

Am I being neurotic?

I don't know. That is a psychiatric diagnosis.

However, you were being responsible.

Remember the golden rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
If you owned a store, and had to pay people to clean the glass or clean the
glass yourself, would you want kids putting their hands all over the glass?

That's your answer.

Jeff

Thanks!

"Mary Ann Tuli" wrote in message
...
There is a HUGE difference between a child running amok and a child not
being chastised for pointing to something through a window or display
cabinet under the supervision of an adult.
TBH, I would not patronise a shop which scorned my child for smudging
their cabinet by say pointing and asking questions about a wonderful
model train kept under a glass cabinet. I'm not saying I would encourage
it only that it's not such a huge deal.


Of course there is a difference between a toddler of 16mo and children who
are 5, 6, 7... I don't think a 16mo has the capacity to understand WHY they
can't touch the display case, not until at least 2.5yo IMO. They might
understand the word "no" but not "why".

A fair amount of how I parent comes from my own upbringing by my parents and
adult relatives. I suppose that's how we are as parents ourselves. We
usually follow the lead of our parents, conditioning the human traits that
are upstanding, and not repeating certain aspects that we deemed too harsh
as children ourselves. There's so many kinds of parenting, parents can be
rigid in one area, but lax in another.

I have 2 DS, 5yo and 17mo. Several times we've been out to the mall and
salespeople have gone out of their way to tell us how well-behaved our boys
are. DS1 doesn't touch anything without asking except when he gets overly
excited (i.e. spying a bag of candy). They are both very chatty and carry
conversations among adults (some children are taught not to speak in
company) - so I am relaxed in that area. DS1's teacher says he shows great
respect for books, items and others in school. I guess what I'm saying is
respect for people/things at an early age will go far in how one treats
others and expects to be treated in life.

Mary Ann Tuli wrote in
:



It's true the salespeople's responsibility is to clean
their display cases over the course of the day. Like any
business, it's alot of upkeep to maintain a quality image.
It would be polite for children *and* adults not to smudge
w/ their hands or tap all over the display cases. Just the
other day at the mall, some parent let their kids run amok
and managed to crack a large cosmetic display case in the
process. I'm sure it all started with just touching....


There is a HUGE difference between a child running amok and
a child not being chastised for pointing to something
through a window or display cabinet under the supervision
of an adult. TBH, I would not patronise a shop which
scorned my child for smudging their cabinet by say pointing
and asking questions about a wonderful model train kept
under a glass cabinet. I'm not saying I would encourage it
only that it's not such a huge deal.

while i would not have chastized a child, especially a
toddler, for smudging a display, i certainly would not have
had very charitable thoughts about the parents. IMNSHO, it's
the parents resposibility to teach thier kids manners &
putting gooey fingers all over a display is wrong.
some poor minimum wage schmuck has to clean the display case
*every* time it gets all fingerprinted, in addition to all the
other jobs they have to do in thier allotted time. if you've
never worked retail you might not understand *why* it's so
annoying to have to wipe the displays numerous times, or
refold the clothing displays, or refile the books or...
think of it as like being a stay at home parent with 30 or 40
2-3 hyper 2-3 year olds who never nap & don't redirect have
pity on the employees.
lee ex-retail drone

I guess what I'm saying is
respect for people/things at an early age will go far in how one treats
others and expects to be treated in life.

Apsolutely. Maybe this is a cultural difference (I'm in the UK).
If was a shop owner I would certainly not mind people touching my glass
cabinets. I would expect it to happen as part of the course. I would
expect children NOT to run amok, or put dirty fingers on glass cabinets,
but a child (or an adult) putting their finger on a glass cabinet in the
process of looking at something is not IMO disrespectful.

Mary Ann

enigma wrote:

Mary Ann Tuli wrote in
:



It's true the salespeople's responsibility is to clean
their display cases over the course of the day. Like any
business, it's alot of upkeep to maintain a quality image.
It would be polite for children *and* adults not to smudge
w/ their hands or tap all over the display cases. Just the
other day at the mall, some parent let their kids run amok
and managed to crack a large cosmetic display case in the
process. I'm sure it all started with just touching....


There is a HUGE difference between a child running amok and
a child not being chastised for pointing to something
through a window or display cabinet under the supervision
of an adult. TBH, I would not patronise a shop which
scorned my child for smudging their cabinet by say pointing
and asking questions about a wonderful model train kept
under a glass cabinet. I'm not saying I would encourage it
only that it's not such a huge deal.


while i would not have chastized a child, especially a
toddler, for smudging a display, i certainly would not have
had very charitable thoughts about the parents. IMNSHO, it's
the parents resposibility to teach thier kids manners &
putting gooey fingers all over a display is wrong.

Who said anything about gooey?!

some poor minimum wage schmuck has to clean the display case
*every* time it gets all fingerprinted, in addition to all the
other jobs they have to do in thier allotted time. if you've
never worked retail you might not understand *why* it's so
annoying to have to wipe the displays numerous times, or
refold the clothing displays, or refile the books or...

I have worked in retail. I would not be happy if toddlers with dirty
fingers left their mark (but I would accept that with the best will in
the world it's going to happen regardless of how attentive the parents
are), but I would not mind if a toddler under supervision left a
fingerprint because they were looking at the display.

Mary Ann

In article , Mary Ann Tuli says...



enigma wrote:

Mary Ann Tuli wrote in
:



It's true the salespeople's responsibility is to clean
their display cases over the course of the day. Like any
business, it's alot of upkeep to maintain a quality image.
It would be polite for children *and* adults not to smudge
w/ their hands or tap all over the display cases. Just the
other day at the mall, some parent let their kids run amok
and managed to crack a large cosmetic display case in the
process. I'm sure it all started with just touching....


There is a HUGE difference between a child running amok and
a child not being chastised for pointing to something
through a window or display cabinet under the supervision
of an adult. TBH, I would not patronise a shop which
scorned my child for smudging their cabinet by say pointing
and asking questions about a wonderful model train kept
under a glass cabinet. I'm not saying I would encourage it
only that it's not such a huge deal.


while i would not have chastized a child, especially a
toddler, for smudging a display, i certainly would not have
had very charitable thoughts about the parents. IMNSHO, it's
the parents resposibility to teach thier kids manners &
putting gooey fingers all over a display is wrong.

Who said anything about gooey?!

some poor minimum wage schmuck has to clean the display case
*every* time it gets all fingerprinted, in addition to all the
other jobs they have to do in thier allotted time. if you've
never worked retail you might not understand *why* it's so
annoying to have to wipe the displays numerous times, or
refold the clothing displays, or refile the books or...

I have worked in retail. I would not be happy if toddlers with dirty
fingers left their mark (but I would accept that with the best will in
the world it's going to happen regardless of how attentive the parents
are), but I would not mind if a toddler under supervision left a
fingerprint because they were looking at the display.

Mary Ann



Well, you like to present a picture of a sweet little child in a toy store,
pushing one clean little finger against the glass, pointing at a precious little
toy train. If sweet little toddlers all had clean hands, only entered toy
stores, and all somehow only pointed only with one sweet little clean finger,
you'd have a point.

In the real world, toddler's hands tend to get into stuff and tend to get
sticky, go into all manner of stores including jewelrey stores, etc., and tend
to put flat hands - (note the subject line of this thread), unless *very*
closely supervised, all over the glass multiple times.

So let me give a dispensation: Sweet little toddlers with clean hands pointing
one sweet little finger at a sweet little toys is OK and only mean bad bad bad
ogres would deny them that opportunity.

For the rest of the toddlers of the world in the rest of the stores with glass
cases of the world, parents need to teach them hands off.

Deal?

Banty

"Banty" wrote in message
...
In article , Mary Ann Tuli says...



enigma wrote:

Mary Ann Tuli wrote in
:



It's true the salespeople's responsibility is to clean
their display cases over the course of the day. Like any
business, it's alot of upkeep to maintain a quality image.
It would be polite for children *and* adults not to smudge
w/ their hands or tap all over the display cases. Just the
other day at the mall, some parent let their kids run amok
and managed to crack a large cosmetic display case in the
process. I'm sure it all started with just touching....


There is a HUGE difference between a child running amok and
a child not being chastised for pointing to something
through a window or display cabinet under the supervision
of an adult. TBH, I would not patronise a shop which
scorned my child for smudging their cabinet by say pointing
and asking questions about a wonderful model train kept
under a glass cabinet. I'm not saying I would encourage it
only that it's not such a huge deal.


while i would not have chastized a child, especially a
toddler, for smudging a display, i certainly would not have
had very charitable thoughts about the parents. IMNSHO, it's
the parents resposibility to teach thier kids manners &
putting gooey fingers all over a display is wrong.

Who said anything about gooey?!

some poor minimum wage schmuck has to clean the display case
*every* time it gets all fingerprinted, in addition to all the
other jobs they have to do in thier allotted time. if you've
never worked retail you might not understand *why* it's so
annoying to have to wipe the displays numerous times, or
refold the clothing displays, or refile the books or...

I have worked in retail. I would not be happy if toddlers with dirty
fingers left their mark (but I would accept that with the best will in
the world it's going to happen regardless of how attentive the parents
are), but I would not mind if a toddler under supervision left a
fingerprint because they were looking at the display.

Mary Ann



Well, you like to present a picture of a sweet little child in a toy
store,
pushing one clean little finger against the glass, pointing at a precious
little
toy train. If sweet little toddlers all had clean hands, only entered toy
stores, and all somehow only pointed only with one sweet little clean
finger,
you'd have a point.

In the real world, toddler's hands tend to get into stuff and tend to get
sticky, go into all manner of stores including jewelrey stores, etc., and
tend
to put flat hands - (note the subject line of this thread), unless *very*
closely supervised, all over the glass multiple times.

So let me give a dispensation: Sweet little toddlers with clean hands
pointing
one sweet little finger at a sweet little toys is OK and only mean bad bad
bad
ogres would deny them that opportunity.

For the rest of the toddlers of the world in the rest of the stores with
glass
cases of the world, parents need to teach them hands off.

Deal?

Banty

Maybe my daughter is the only one but 99% of the time her hands are pretty
darned clean. She actualy does not like if her hands have goopy stuff on
them. I do try to keep them off stuff but usualy keeping the cart far
enough away from the counter is good enough.

Tori

--
Bonnie 3/20/02
Anna or Xavier due 10/17/04

On 22 Jun 2004 08:56:12 -0700, Banty snuck
out of the ether to utter:

Well, you like to present a picture of a sweet little child in a toy store,
pushing one clean little finger against the glass, pointing at a precious little
toy train. If sweet little toddlers all had clean hands, only entered toy
stores, and all somehow only pointed only with one sweet little clean finger,
you'd have a point.

In the real world, toddler's hands tend to get into stuff and tend to get
sticky, go into all manner of stores including jewelrey stores, etc., and tend
to put flat hands - (note the subject line of this thread), unless *very*
closely supervised, all over the glass multiple times.

So let me give a dispensation: Sweet little toddlers with clean hands pointing
one sweet little finger at a sweet little toys is OK and only mean bad bad bad
ogres would deny them that opportunity.

For the rest of the toddlers of the world in the rest of the stores with glass
cases of the world, parents need to teach them hands off.

Deal?

Banty

Once again, you said it better than I ;-)
Great post!

Nan
--
"when the sun goes down we'll be groovin'
when the sun goes down we'll be feelin' alright,
when the sun sinks down over the water
everything gets hotter when the sun goes down"
~Kenny Chesney

In article ,
"Tori M." wrote:



Maybe my daughter is the only one but 99% of the time her hands are pretty
darned clean. She actualy does not like if her hands have goopy stuff on
them. I do try to keep them off stuff but usualy keeping the cart far
enough away from the counter is good enough.

Tori

I've been reading this thread with interest, and trying to remember what
I did when my kids were small. I don't remember ever making a big deal
about glass cases or doors or windows; maybe I just figured I was in
good shape if they weren't breaking anything . . .

I do remember some of the rules we had once the kids were walking. They
ALL hated being in the stroller (or the shopping cart) for very long, so
if they wanted to walk in a store the rules were that they could only
touch things with their eyes, and that they had to keep their thumbs
together. It's pretty hard to pick things up if your thumbs are linked,
and it gave them something to DO (as opposed to all the things they
couldn't do) and seemed to do a good job of reminding them that they
weren't supposed to be touching things with their hands. Those rules
probably kept the worst of the smudging glass problems under control.

And, with 3 kids in 3 years, I really didn't spend a lot of time in the
sorts of stores that have lots of glass cases!

meh
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

On 22 Jun 2004 13:41:16 GMT, enigma wrote:

IMNSHO, it's
the parents resposibility to teach thier kids manners &
putting gooey fingers all over a display is wrong.

Why do you think the child's fingers are gooey? They may
be as clean as any adult's hands, you know.


--
Dorothy

There is no sound, no cry in all the world
that can be heard unless someone listens ..

The Outer Limits