Any advice for potty training??

On Tue, 18 Dec 2007 11:11:20 -0800 (PST), mommak
wrote:

Yes as a matter of fact I do. Why does it matter??????

Because you've been asked politely not to do so? Because several
posters have pointed out how it is against netiquette to do so?

Nan

In article ,
mommak says...

On Dec 18, 1:15 pm, Nan wrote:
On Tue, 18 Dec 2007 08:52:12 -0800 (PST), mommak

wrote:
I have a one year old little girl that hides when she is pottying. I
sometimes catch her behind a door or under the table. She will be in a
squating position and will be grunting. At what age were your children
potty trained?? Is it too early to start. When I catch her doing it, I
will take her into the bathroom and tell her you poopy in here in the
potty. Any advice???

Okay, even though it annoyed me that you spammed your blog yet
again.... I'll respond.

A year really is too young to even try, but I noticed in your other
post that you show her the toilet and talk to her about it. No harm
in that, but I doubt she's understanding much.

All 3 of my children trained well after the age of 3. I took a
complete hands-off approach and decided they would do it when they
were ready and not a minute sooner. Saved me countless hours of
cleaning up any messes and frustration.

Nan

I waas asking, because my Aunt has 3 kids as well and all of them were
pretty much potty trained by the age of 2.... But of course they still
had some accidents.

Which kinda goes to the definition of "potty training". A lot of times people
claim kids were potty trained early, but they had a lot of "accidents". Because
they really weren't ready. A.K.A. - not potty trained.

Our mother's generation was urged to do early potty training. It was harder to
be sanitary about the diapers, and childrearing philosophies were different.
But there were "accidents" which were considered part of it. The accidents
revealed what a struggle it is for an unready child.

If children are allowed to wait until they're truly ready, it's often around
three and a half. Ready meaning, physically can hold it, knows how to use the
bathroom, can deal with arranging the clothes, and has the wherewithall to
interrupt whatever they're doing in order to go to the bathroom. My son was
done potty training in a few days.

If parents have to hover over a little child every minute to catch those
need-to-signs, it's not the child that's potty-trained, the *parent* is.

Banty

mommak wrote in

oups.com:

I waas asking, because my Aunt has 3 kids as well and all
of them were pretty much potty trained by the age of 2....
But of course they still had some accidents.

then they aren't really potty trained. your aunt may have been
trained to take them to the toilet at certain intervals, but a
potty trained child doesn't have accidents. they can give you
enough warning to find them a bathroom.
anyway, my son trained a bit late, but he's autistic so it's
actually pretty normal. he was 4 years, 3 months. he got up
one morning, put on underpants instead of a pull-up & that was
the end of diapers. no muss, no fuss, no accidents.
BTW, he was changing his own (cloth all-in-one) diapers at 2
years old, well, the wet ones at least. i thought there was
something wrong because he never had a wet diaper, & then i
caught him changing. pretty funny.
lee

On Dec 18, 2:47 pm, Banty wrote:
In article ,
mommak says...







On Dec 18, 12:28 pm, Banty wrote:
In article ,
mommak says...

On Dec 18, 11:52 am, mommak wrote:
I have a one year old little girl that hides when she is pottying. I
sometimes catch her behind a door or under the table. She will be in a
squating position and will be grunting. At what age were your children
potty trained?? Is it too early to start. When I catch her doing it, I
will take her into the bathroom and tell her you poopy in here in the
potty. Any advice???

I also have some information on how I have managed to wean my 1 year
old.

http://weaning-your-baby.blogspot.com/

Do you realize you posted this to the same Usenet newsgroup again?

Banty

Yes as a matter of fact I do. Why does it matter??????

Because it's a waste of bandwidth and is irritating. It's long been against
netiquette to do so.

Banty- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

Never said you had to reply to my posts. I'm not making you read my
stuff. You choose to do that

On Dec 18, 5:20 pm, enigma wrote:
mommak wrote
oups.com:

I waas asking, because my Aunt has 3 kids as well and all
of them were pretty much potty trained by the age of 2....
But of course they still had some accidents.

then they aren't really potty trained. your aunt may have been
trained to take them to the toilet at certain intervals, but a
potty trained child doesn't have accidents. they can give you
enough warning to find them a bathroom.
anyway, my son trained a bit late, but he's autistic so it's
actually pretty normal. he was 4 years, 3 months. he got up
one morning, put on underpants instead of a pull-up & that was
the end of diapers. no muss, no fuss, no accidents.
BTW, he was changing his own (cloth all-in-one) diapers at 2
years old, well, the wet ones at least. i thought there was
something wrong because he never had a wet diaper, & then i
caught him changing. pretty funny.
lee

They were potty trained enough that they could tell their momma I have
to potty. But some times they told momma too late, and they didn't
make it to the bathroom in time. All I'm asking for is some advice.
When it comes times for her to be potty trained what do yall
recommend. Such as: Should I be asking her if she needs to go. When
should I put her on the potty for the first time? Like if I find her
hiding under the table pooping, should I take the diaper off and let
her finish in the potty. What would be a good age for that?? Don't
want to argue with any one... I just want some advice.

On Dec 18, 5:00 pm, Banty wrote:
In article ,
mommak says...







On Dec 18, 1:15 pm, Nan wrote:
On Tue, 18 Dec 2007 08:52:12 -0800 (PST), mommak

wrote:
I have a one year old little girl that hides when she is pottying. I
sometimes catch her behind a door or under the table. She will be in a
squating position and will be grunting. At what age were your children
potty trained?? Is it too early to start. When I catch her doing it, I
will take her into the bathroom and tell her you poopy in here in the
potty. Any advice???

Okay, even though it annoyed me that you spammed your blog yet
again.... I'll respond.

A year really is too young to even try, but I noticed in your other
post that you show her the toilet and talk to her about it. No harm
in that, but I doubt she's understanding much.

All 3 of my children trained well after the age of 3. I took a
complete hands-off approach and decided they would do it when they
were ready and not a minute sooner. Saved me countless hours of
cleaning up any messes and frustration.

Nan

I waas asking, because my Aunt has 3 kids as well and all of them were
pretty much potty trained by the age of 2.... But of course they still
had some accidents.

Which kinda goes to the definition of "potty training". A lot of times people
claim kids were potty trained early, but they had a lot of "accidents". Because
they really weren't ready. A.K.A. - not potty trained.

Our mother's generation was urged to do early potty training. It was harder to
be sanitary about the diapers, and childrearing philosophies were different.
But there were "accidents" which were considered part of it. The accidents
revealed what a struggle it is for an unready child.

If children are allowed to wait until they're truly ready, it's often around
three and a half. Ready meaning, physically can hold it, knows how to use the
bathroom, can deal with arranging the clothes, and has the wherewithall to
interrupt whatever they're doing in order to go to the bathroom. My son was
done potty training in a few days.

If parents have to hover over a little child every minute to catch those
need-to-signs, it's not the child that's potty-trained, the *parent* is.

Banty- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

They were potty trained enough that they could tell their momma I
have
to potty. But some times they told momma too late, and they didn't
make it to the bathroom in time. All I'm asking for is some advice.
When it comes times for her to be potty trained what do yall
recommend. Such as: Should I be asking her if she needs to go. When
should I put her on the potty for the first time? Like if I find her
hiding under the table pooping, should I take the diaper off and let
her finish in the potty. What would be a good age for that?? Don't
want to argue with any one... I just want some advice.

On Dec 18, 2:47 pm, Banty wrote:
In article ,
mommak says...







On Dec 18, 12:28 pm, Banty wrote:
In article ,
mommak says...

On Dec 18, 11:52 am, mommak wrote:
I have a one year old little girl that hides when she is pottying. I
sometimes catch her behind a door or under the table. She will be in a
squating position and will be grunting. At what age were your children
potty trained?? Is it too early to start. When I catch her doing it, I
will take her into the bathroom and tell her you poopy in here in the
potty. Any advice???

I also have some information on how I have managed to wean my 1 year
old.

http://weaning-your-baby.blogspot.com/

Do you realize you posted this to the same Usenet newsgroup again?

Banty

Yes as a matter of fact I do. Why does it matter??????

Because it's a waste of bandwidth and is irritating. It's long been against
netiquette to do so.

Banty- Hide quoted text -

- Show quoted text -

yeah ok

mommak wrote:

They were potty trained enough that they could tell their momma I
have
to potty. But some times they told momma too late, and they didn't
make it to the bathroom in time. All I'm asking for is some advice.
When it comes times for her to be potty trained what do yall
recommend. Such as: Should I be asking her if she needs to go. When
should I put her on the potty for the first time? Like if I find her
hiding under the table pooping, should I take the diaper off and let
her finish in the potty. What would be a good age for that?? Don't
want to argue with any one... I just want some advice.

And you got some. Many of us prefer to leave well
enough alone until the child is truly ready to train, at
which point it often goes very quickly (i.e., a few days max)
and very easily (i.e., few or no accidents). The sorts of
tactics you mention above *can* backfire and make a child very
resistant to potty training, even if you keep them relatively
low key.
There are other people who advocate early potty
training who may give different advice, but so far most of
the folks posting on this thread *have* given you advice,
which is to leave it alone until she's quite a bit older and
really ready to train.

Best wishes,
Ericka

On Dec 18, 4:00 pm, Banty wrote:
In article ,
mommak says...

I waas asking, because my Aunt has 3 kids as well and all of them were
pretty much potty trained by the age of 2.... But of course they still
had some accidents.

Which kinda goes to the definition of "potty training". A lot of times people
claim kids were potty trained early, but they had a lot of "accidents". Because
they really weren't ready. A.K.A. - not potty trained.

Our mother's generation was urged to do early potty training. It was harder to
be sanitary about the diapers, and childrearing philosophies were different.
But there were "accidents" which were considered part of it. The accidents
revealed what a struggle it is for an unready child.

Go back a little more -- say, 1900 or so, and you'll find that babies
were being "potty-trained" as early as 6 months old. Of course, those
babies were no more physiologically or intellectually ready than
babies are today -- but without automatic washing machines, it was
absolutely critical that moms minimize the amount of mess to be
cleaned up. Not only was it unpleasant doing all that laundry (and
remember, these weren't the superabsorbent cloth diapers that came
about later), each change would also be incredibly time-consuming --
difficult if you're sewing most of your family's clothes, growing and
cooking food before labor-saving devices, chopping or bringing in wood
for the fireplace or stove, etc.!

You better believe those moms got infants on a regular schedule! It
helped them know what time of day their kid was likely to poop. In
addition, like you, mommak, they also noted a child's facial
expressions and body movements immediately before the Big Event --
then they'd grab the kid, undress him and get him over a pot as fast
as possible. And be very pleased when they managed to do it!

That's why Banty (& lots more people) will tell you babies weren't
potty-trained -- the parents (moms) were trained.

If children are allowed to wait until they're truly ready, it's often around
three and a half. Ready meaning, physically can hold it, knows how to use the
bathroom, can deal with arranging the clothes, and has the wherewithall to
interrupt whatever they're doing in order to go to the bathroom. My son was
done potty training in a few days.

Girls are often ready a little sooner than boys -- my daughter was 27
mos. and my 2 boys were just past 3 years old. We did the Potty
Training in Less than a Day, and were pleased.

It breaks the whole process into steps that are very easily understood/
applied by kids who are developmentally ready. And the authors spend
some time detailing what those signs are, because it's really, really
frustrating and unfair for parents to expect a kid to do something
that he's physically not able to do.

That's the biggest danger of the early toilet training expectation/
hope, IMO -- it sets up a situation where the kid at best disappoints
those caring for him or worse, ends up being punished for it. How many
kids get abused (or even killed) because caregivers think a kid is
stubbornly, willfully, disobediently causing messes to be cleaned up?
Read the news stories or police reports -- it's frequently a "reason"
abusers give.

Mommak, I'm NOT suggesting that's what will happen if you show your 1-
year-old the toilet or try to encourage its use. I AM saying that 2
years is a long time to be patient and gentle and all those other good
things while cleaning up the inevitable accidents, for you and anyone
else who ever watches her (even for short periods of time).

If parents have to hover over a little child every minute to catch those
need-to-signs, it's not the child that's potty-trained, the *parent* is.

Exactly.

Lori G.

Hi --

I'd suggest leaving a kiddie-potty where it's handy and see if she's
willing to sit on it. As long as you don't push, and don't show anger
or upset when she won't or can't comply, then go with your instincts and
see what she can do.

At this age, toilet training seems to have stages. One is the ability
to know when she needs to go and try to get to the toilet. Another
(often coming much, much later) is the ability to go on demand, such as
right before leaving the house. Another is the ability to go
independently, as in removing her own clothing and putting it back on
when she's done. Wiping is a gradually acquired skill, and you should
keep close tabs on how she does it without getting frustrated that she's
not very good at it.

Each skill -- I'm not sure if I hit them all -- can be acquired
separately, and don't need to happen all at once...

Another thing you may want to consider is the bare-bottom approach.
This approach (best done in summer, in my opinion) helps kids get the
connection between physical sensation and what comes out. The diaper
can really get in the way of this connection.

I hope these ideas help,
--Beth Kevles
-THE-COM-HERE
http://web.mit.edu/kevles/www/nomilk.html -- a page for the milk-allergic
Disclaimer: Nothing in this message should be construed as medical
advice. Please consult with your own medical practicioner.

NOTE: No email is read at my MIT address. Use the GMAIL one if you would
like me to reply.