your opinion please ( baby traveling away from mom)

I agree. I could not leave my baby that young even with grandparents.
Especially if the baby had never been with them before. I would see if
you guys could splurge and have you go as well. It would be nice if you
could all be together. Im sure that his parents would never do anything
to harm the baby but depending on how old they are and how old
fashioned they are they might handle situations differently. I mean
when was that last time they cared for an infant that young 24hrs day???

"Beth Kevles" wrote in message
...

Hi --

Can you go too?

Well, we've been trying to be more frugal since I've opted not to go back to
work for a while longer with a new baby at home. Summer airfare to Germany
is astronomical...

We may be going back this Christmas, if things go well.

"Sidheag McCormack" wrote in message
...
oregonchick writes:

My husband is from Germany. All his family is still there (We're in the
US). He travels back there for business trips about once a year, and
this year it will probably be in August. He wants to take the baby with
him to drop off at his parents while he is there on business for a whole
week. Emily will be 8 months at that time. My husband will not be
staying at the house for that time period. He assures me that his mother
will take perfect care of Emily, but I feel sooo uncomfortable with this
on so many levels. Regardless of whether or not she takes perfect care,
I can't imagine her being gone for a whole week, being so far away, etc.
Of course his parents will have very limited opportunities to see their
ONLY grandchild, so I feel a little guilty.

He wants to leave the baby with his parents, who are presumably not well
known to the baby, without either parent, for a week? My opinion of that
is
untypable in a family newsgroup. Let's settle for "no way".

I understand your strong reaction, but for me there's no need to react like
this as my husband supports my decision no matter what it is. But my gut
said the same thing that you did.

"peggy-o" wrote in message
ups.com...
I agree. I could not leave my baby that young even with grandparents.
Especially if the baby had never been with them before. I would see if
you guys could splurge and have you go as well. It would be nice if you
could all be together. Im sure that his parents would never do anything
to harm the baby but depending on how old they are and how old
fashioned they are they might handle situations differently.

I mean
when was that last time they cared for an infant that young 24hrs day???

Um, like 40 years ago... and lets face it, things were alot different back
then, especially in Europe (compared to the US)

"oregonchick" wrote in message
...
My husband is from Germany. All his family is still there (We're in the
US). He travels back there for business trips about once a year, and this
year it will probably be in August. He wants to take the baby with him to
drop off at his parents while he is there on business for a whole week.
Emily will be 8 months at that time. My husband will not be staying at
the house for that time period. He assures me that his mother will take
perfect care of Emily, but I feel sooo uncomfortable with this on so many
levels. Regardless of whether or not she takes perfect care, I can't
imagine her being gone for a whole week, being so far away, etc. Of
course his parents will have very limited opportunities to see their ONLY
grandchild, so I feel a little guilty.

Opinions?

I wouldn't do that now, with my 22 month old. She's breastfeeding, but
regardless of that it would upset her no end. There would have to be a hell
of a more important reason than 'giving the grandparents time with the
kids'. They must take an extremely naive view, or just don't want to see
that the reality of the situation is that they'll have an upset, unsettled,
disturbed child for most of the time who won't love them anymore for it.
My daughter was gradually accustomed to spending longer periods of time away
from me when she was 11 months and I went back to work part time. And then,
it was with the grandparents she knew.


--
Amy
Mum to Carlos born sleeping 20/11/02,
& Ana born screaming 30/06/04
http://www.freewebs.com/carlos2002/
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/a/ana%5Fj%5F2004/
My blog: http://spaces.msn.com/members/querer-hijo-querer-hija/

"Mum of Two" wrote in message
...
"oregonchick" wrote in message
...
My husband is from Germany. All his family is still there (We're in the
US). He travels back there for business trips about once a year, and
this year it will probably be in August. He wants to take the baby with
him to drop off at his parents while he is there on business for a whole
week. Emily will be 8 months at that time. My husband will not be
staying at the house for that time period. He assures me that his mother
will take perfect care of Emily, but I feel sooo uncomfortable with this
on so many levels. Regardless of whether or not she takes perfect care, I
can't imagine her being gone for a whole week, being so far away, etc.
Of course his parents will have very limited opportunities to see their
ONLY grandchild, so I feel a little guilty.

Opinions?

I wouldn't do that now, with my 22 month old. She's breastfeeding, but
regardless of that it would upset her no end. There would have to be a
hell of a more important reason than 'giving the grandparents time with
the kids'. They must take an extremely naive view, or just don't want to
see that the reality of the situation is that they'll have an upset,
unsettled, disturbed child for most of the time who won't love them
anymore for it.
My daughter was gradually accustomed to spending longer periods of time
away from me when she was 11 months and I went back to work part time. And
then, it was with the grandparents she knew.

Well, I guess I didn't include enough details. It was my husband's idea,
not the grandparents. I don't even think they know that he had considered
it. And he only brought it up to see how I felt about it - he has never had
children before, and is kind of naive to what would really be involved in
doing this. But he does now!

"oregonchick" wrote in message
. ..

Well, I guess I didn't include enough details. It was my husband's idea,
not the grandparents. I don't even think they know that he had considered
it. And he only brought it up to see how I felt about it - he has never
had children before, and is kind of naive to what would really be involved
in doing this. But he does now!

Oh, well that makes more sense! Most new fathers wouldn't understand the
effect something like that could have on a child, unless they'd had a lot of
contact with young children. For that matter, I don't think a lot of new
mothers would either; I was very naive about that while pregnant.


--
Amy
Mum to Carlos born sleeping 20/11/02,
& Ana born screaming 30/06/04
http://www.freewebs.com/carlos2002/
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/a/ana%5Fj%5F2004/
My blog: http://spaces.msn.com/members/querer-hijo-querer-hija/

oregonchick wrote:
My husband is from Germany. All his family is still there (We're in the
US). He travels back there for business trips about once a year, and this
year it will probably be in August. He wants to take the baby with him to
drop off at his parents while he is there on business for a whole week.
Emily will be 8 months at that time. My husband will not be staying at the
house for that time period. He assures me that his mother will take perfect
care of Emily, but I feel sooo uncomfortable with this on so many levels.
Regardless of whether or not she takes perfect care, I can't imagine her
being gone for a whole week, being so far away, etc. Of course his parents
will have very limited opportunities to see their ONLY grandchild, so I feel
a little guilty.

Opinions?

Absolutely not. I think the very suggestion is hideous. If they are
so hot to see the baby, they can come visit YOU for a week, and see
their only grandchild in her home, where she's with her mother and
won't be traumatized by being separated from you for that long. Or, if
you want to travel, you can go with her and stay with her at his
parents for a week, but there is NO way that I would allow my daughter
to go anywhere for that long without me. None. Not under any
circumstances in the world. Not even if I were in the hospital or
something. Good God...

My daughter is 8.5 months right now, and she is having major stranger
anxiety (and, related to your daughter or not, these people are
strangers to her!). If I am out of sight, she screams. My mom (who
she knows well, and has seen on a regular basis since she was born)
tried to take her in another room to show her off today, and the minute
I was out of her sight, DD was throwing her body in the direction of
the room where I was and screaming. There is no way on earth that I
would let her out of the building I was in for a day, much less out of
the country for a week.

You shouldn't feel guilty for one minute. I think your husband is
insane for suggesting it. And if your MIL went along with it, or
suggested it in any way, I think it is very telling... I wouldn't
trust someone who thinks it's ok for a child that young to be away from
her mother for a week to watch my kid for an hour. Even if your
husband were going to be there, it wouldn't be ok. It is not ok until
she's old enough to understand what's going on. Think of it from her
point of view, with her limited ability to understand the world. What
would she think had happened? All of a sudden, she's in a strange
house, with strange people, and strange smells, speaking a strange
language that she doesn't understand, with nothing that reminds her of
home? Oh my God, it's a horrible thought. Do NOT do it. And don't
feel guilty at all - that's ridiculous. You are her MOTHER. You're
her world right now. She doesn't care about anything but having you
with her. You are the source of all safety and comfort and happiness
in her tiny little world. Don't do this to her.

Amy

Mum of Two skrev:
I wouldn't do that now, with my 22 month old. She's breastfeeding, but
regardless of that it would upset her no end. There would have to be a hell
of a more important reason than 'giving the grandparents time with the
kids'. They must take an extremely naive view, or just don't want to see
that the reality of the situation is that they'll have an upset, unsettled,
disturbed child for most of the time who won't love them anymore for it.
My daughter was gradually accustomed to spending longer periods of time away
from me when she was 11 months and I went back to work part time. And then,
it was with the grandparents she knew.



Their view can be influenced by the fact that most mothers work in
Europe, so most kids of age 8 mos is in some kind of daycare all day.

That doesn't mean it's a good idea, and 8 mos is a delicate age.

Tine, Denmark

"Workingmom" schreef in bericht
...

Their view can be influenced by the fact that most mothers work in
Europe, so most kids of age 8 mos is in some kind of daycare all day.


Not in Germany. Germany is as old-fashioned as The Netherlands in these.

Jan