Dr. Phil

I saw a Dr. Phil the other night. It was a mother they revisited who
has been in therapy. Her own daughter called her a monster, due to her
horrible parenting style. But there was hope and she found it. It was
amazing to see mom taking time out for herself. I think doing too much
makes mothers more prone to fussiness and breakdowns. Any thoughts?
Vicky
(who takes time outs when "I" am angry.)

"Vickychick" wrote in message
om...
I saw a Dr. Phil the other night. It was a mother they revisited who
has been in therapy. Her own daughter called her a monster, due to her
horrible parenting style. But there was hope and she found it. It was
amazing to see mom taking time out for herself. I think doing too much
makes mothers more prone to fussiness and breakdowns. Any thoughts?
Vicky
(who takes time outs when "I" am angry.)

Hi,

I assume you are talking about single mothers? My thoughts are that single
parents can easily fall into trying to do too much and give too much of
themselves. There is only so much to go round at any one time and you need
to recharge yourself to be of most use to your kid. If you take no time out
you come to a point of diminishing returns at some stage and find you just
are'nt as useful to/good for your kid as you could be with a recharge. You
are the most important thing in your childs universe and its important to
keep yourself in tip top condition to fulfill that responsibility. One of
the hardest things to come to terms with is the fact that you should not
feel guilty for being human and needing some time to get yourself together
as well.I have scheduled a recharge for Dec 12th and I am going to a
function with some people I used to work with on a large project five or six
years ago. Intend to seriously let loose, my daughter is going to stay at my
sisters that night (I know my daughter will not be impressed but it won't do
her harm, there is another kid to play with, she gets on with them and will
be safe and I will feel revitalised (once the hangover subsides))

PS, the guilt thing, note I am justifying myself to myself and others in the
last bit.

PPS end of thoughts

Andrew

Andrew wrote in message
...

"Vickychick" wrote in message
om...
I saw a Dr. Phil the other night. It was a mother they revisited who
has been in therapy. Her own daughter called her a monster, due to her
horrible parenting style. But there was hope and she found it. It was
amazing to see mom taking time out for herself. I think doing too much
makes mothers more prone to fussiness and breakdowns. Any thoughts?
Vicky
(who takes time outs when "I" am angry.)

Hi,

I assume you are talking about single mothers? My thoughts are that single
parents can easily fall into trying to do too much and give too much of
themselves. There is only so much to go round at any one time and you need
to recharge yourself to be of most use to your kid. If you take no time
out
you come to a point of diminishing returns at some stage and find you just
are'nt as useful to/good for your kid as you could be with a recharge. You
are the most important thing in your childs universe and its important to
keep yourself in tip top condition to fulfill that responsibility. One of
the hardest things to come to terms with is the fact that you should not
feel guilty for being human and needing some time to get yourself together
as well.I have scheduled a recharge for Dec 12th and I am going to a
function with some people I used to work with on a large project five or
six
years ago. Intend to seriously let loose, my daughter is going to stay at
my
sisters that night (I know my daughter will not be impressed but it won't
do
her harm, there is another kid to play with, she gets on with them and
will
be safe and I will feel revitalised (once the hangover subsides))

PS, the guilt thing, note I am justifying myself to myself and others in
the
last bit.

PPS end of thoughts

Andrew



I am not sure if the original post was on single parenting but I like to add
that ALL parents fall into that trap of being to giving of themselves. Of
what I see around me and in my profession, it is not more or less of a
single parenting thing. It is a parenting issue. I also will add, that in
homes where there are two parents, it seems to me that the man is more
likely to take time for himself then the women. That is just what I see, no
stats to back it up. It could be the fathers are doing things to keep them
strong for the family while moms tend to think the family will cease to
exist without them there to control it?

T

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...


the man is more
likely to take time for himself then the women.


moms tend to think the family will cease to
exist without them there to control it?

T



Ahhh marriage, the coming together of a male idle b*stard and a female
egotistical maniac. Sheer bliss.
;-) LOL

(its humor, so any and all attacks will be completely ignored)

Andrew

Andrew wrote in message
...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...


the man is more
likely to take time for himself then the women.


moms tend to think the family will cease to
exist without them there to control it?

T



Ahhh marriage, the coming together of a male idle b*stard and a female
egotistical maniac. Sheer bliss.
;-) LOL

(its humor, so any and all attacks will be completely ignored)

Andrew



You say its humor but I think you know its true. lol... just kidding also.


T

"Andrew" wrote in message
...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...


the man is more
likely to take time for himself then the women.


moms tend to think the family will cease to
exist without them there to control it?

T



Ahhh marriage, the coming together of a male idle b*stard and a female
egotistical maniac. Sheer bliss.
;-) LOL

(its humor, so any and all attacks will be completely ignored)

Andrew


Hey... that's Ms. Ego Maniac to you.

Christine

"CME" wrote in message news:LW4zb.92095$oN2.54527@edtnps84...
"Andrew" wrote in message
...

"Tiffany" wrote in message
...


the man is more
likely to take time for himself then the women.


moms tend to think the family will cease to
exist without them there to control it?

T



Ahhh marriage, the coming together of a male idle b*stard and a female
egotistical maniac. Sheer bliss.
;-) LOL

(its humor, so any and all attacks will be completely ignored)

Andrew


Hey... that's Ms. Ego Maniac to you.

Christine

Self indulging b*stard better and feministic self love?
hee hee.
V

"Tiffany" wrote in message ...


I am not sure if the original post was on single parenting but I like to add
that ALL parents fall into that trap of being to giving of themselves.


Of course, but my original post is geared towards single parents,
hence the newsgroup title.

Of
what I see around me and in my profession, it is not more or less of a
single parenting thing. It is a parenting issue.

Very much, but with a two parent household, functioning within normal
limits, I see the stress is lessened. With a single person, you have
to depend on family, friends, ex's to ease up some stress.

I also will add, that in
homes where there are two parents, it seems to me that the man is more
likely to take time for himself then the women.

That is not always true. The guy I am dating is a single dad and he is
not taking too much time for himself. I think that is generalizing
men.


That is just what I see, no
stats to back it up. It could be the fathers are doing things to keep them
strong for the family while moms tend to think the family will cease to
exist without them there to control it?



Who knows, but with control issues or co-dependant nature, therapy is
needed, in my opinion.

T


V

Vickychick wrote in message
om...
"Tiffany" wrote in message
...


I am not sure if the original post was on single parenting but I like to
add
that ALL parents fall into that trap of being to giving of themselves.


Of course, but my original post is geared towards single parents,
hence the newsgroup title.

Of
what I see around me and in my profession, it is not more or less of a
single parenting thing. It is a parenting issue.

Very much, but with a two parent household, functioning within normal
limits, I see the stress is lessened. With a single person, you have
to depend on family, friends, ex's to ease up some stress.

I also will add, that in
homes where there are two parents, it seems to me that the man is more
likely to take time for himself then the women.

That is not always true. The guy I am dating is a single dad and he is
not taking too much time for himself. I think that is generalizing
men.

But your case is different... he is a single dad..... my comment was
concerning 2 parent homes.


T

as well.I have scheduled a recharge for Dec 12th and I am going to a
function with some people I used to work with on a large project five or
six
years ago. Intend to seriously let loose,

Have it large. Screw some bint. get over the hang over and subsequent
remorse, eat some carbs and do it all again next week!