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#21
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Midwives and my birth/story
Ilse Witch wrote:
Like you, I had long labour with DS and was put on pitocin drip (didn't want epidural though). The reason I was given (I asked afterwards again) was that the contractions were not productive and just making me tired. The way things were going, I'd be labouring for days and just get very exhausted. Then I wouldn't have energy left to push, which is the hardest bit. Just an observation, but I didn't find pushing to be "the hardest bit" at all, at least not during my unmedicated labors. It was a bit harder during the one when I had an epidural, but that was because I couldn't feel what I was doing. Maybe I was just lucky and my babies were in good positions, but pushing just didn't take much effort on my part at all--certainly not nearly as much effort as *not* pushing would have been! -- Be well, Barbara Mom to Sin (Vernon, 2), Misery (Aurora, 4), and the Rising Son (Julian, 6) Aurora (in the bathroom with her dad)--"It looks like an elephant, Daddy." Me (later)--"You should feel flattered." All opinions expressed in this post are well-reasoned and insightful. Needless to say, they are not those of my Internet Service Provider, its other subscribers or lackeys. Anyone who says otherwise is itchin' for a fight. -- with apologies to Michael Feldman |
#22
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Midwives and my birth/story
Circe wrote:
Just an observation, but I didn't find pushing to be "the hardest bit" at all, at least not during my unmedicated labors. It was a bit harder during the one when I had an epidural, but that was because I couldn't feel what I was doing. Maybe I was just lucky and my babies were in good positions, but pushing just didn't take much effort on my part at all--certainly not nearly as much effort as *not* pushing would have been! The pushing just completely totally sucked with my #1 and was just peachy with my #2. With #1 I started pushing when they told me to. *Don't do that!!!*. It totally messed everything up and I never did get back on track. Wait until you feel the urge to push even if you are at 10cm for an hour first! That is my theory anyway :-) -- Nikki Mama to Hunter (5) and Luke (3) |
#23
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Midwives and my birth/story
I am just confused a bit. Did they put you on a drip epidural? I only had
my epidural in for 45 minutes or so but I dont understand how it could keep wearing off without someone shutting it off. Do they have kinds that they just give you anouther shot at intervals? Tori -- Bonnie 3/20/02 Anna or Xavier due 10/17/04 "Jill" wrote in message om... Argh. While my husband is holding the baby, I just wanted to post about my birth experience. (Motherhood is great! But ouch....I am in soooooo much pain, a whole week later! read on...) I had discussed my birthing plans with the midwife beforehand and had told her definitely, I did not want to be in any more pain that I had to and would want an epidural (and would let her know if by chance I didn't end up feeling like I needed one). When they asked me what was most important to me, I said the health of the baby- I will consent to any procedure necessary, if it IS necessary, for the baby's safety, and also- it was really imoprtant to me not to be in pain. They emphasized to me that it is my choice and they fully support whatever I want be it epidural or IV meds or nothing at all. But they assured me, they would have no problems with me having an epidural, that a lot of their patients have them. But what happened....was traumatic, I labored for 18 hours! My water broke at 4am. I had no pain or cramping or contractions. We went to the hospital at about 5:30am. It took a while to get me checked in, and still no contractions. The midwife showed up and immediately ordered an IV drip of Pitocin!! She didn't even ask me, but she did tell me she wanted to do it and her reasoning. She just said she didn't want me going any longer without contractions. I don't understand this? I told her I've heard Pitocin causes more painful contractions and also can increase chances of a C-section. She said it increases C-section chances ONLY when used in someone whose cervix is not ready and probably in people who would end up having a C anyway. She did say the contractions hit harder, and told me they would increase my pitocin very slowly and give me an epidural as soon as the pain became too bad. Well, it was a few hours but the pain hit HARD. She orderedn the epidural and checked me and I was only dilated to 2cm. Since I had the epidural she turned up the Pitocin. I had NO problems with the epidural..I could move my legs and feel everything, but felt no pain, it didn't bother my back or leave me with a headache. But.,......in 2 hours it wore off, and they called anesthesia to give me more meds. They checked me and I was dilated 10- fully dilated! This was about 3pm. She wanted me to "labor down" before pushing so she had the Pitocin turned off and had me rest for an hour. My epidural wore off again! This time she wanted me to push before ythe epidural and it went on for a long time until I was hurting SO bad and nothing was accomplished. I was pushing hard but the baby wasn't moving. I begged for the epidural again and she finally called anesthesia back. Well.......after more pushing and no baby, and me being completely exhausted and in pain....the epidural wore off again!!! I was crying out in pain, and insisting I wanted and needed pain relief per my birth plan. It was way too long before she actually agreed to get the anesthesia person back in. THEN the midwife told the anesthesiologist "Give her only half the amount you have been since she needs to push". The anesthesiologist shot her a look and looked at me (I'm crying by now) and said "If I give half I may as well not even give ANY because it won't help" and the anesthesiologist gave me MORE--- GOD BLESS HER!!!! I was truly in agony, I don't know why it was so bad. Or why the midwife seemed to not care if my epodural wore off. So anyway after 2 more hours of pushing, they had been seeing the baby's head all this time but she was STUCK, and the midwife even said she could see I was truly pushing hard. She finally told me that I was a good pusher and the baby should have been out by now but wasn't coming down. The midwife told me she was calling the OB and transferring care to him, and she told me to get ready for a C-section!!! She told me it would be the doctor's decision, her hands were out of it now, but in allhonesty I was headed for a C-section so she was having the nurses prepare me. I was SO tense!!! And worried. Also by this time the midwife had caused a vaginal tear while reaching in me. Well...the OB, a really wonderful doctor who I had never met, came in and checked me and said he thought he could get the baby out himself. He did have to use forceps and I did have to push but he had the baby out in 10 minutes!!! He also scolded the nurses for some equipment being labelled wrong, my husband said (I wasn't paying attention!) The dr was all-business and he got the job done. And one more thing I forgot to mention, all the while my epidural had worn off, the midwife kept telling me "You said it hurts once- don't mention it again! We are going to think about something else now", and wouldn't let them redo my epidural until SHE wantd them to. My mom did come to the hospital and heard the midwife telling me at the beginning that they would give me pain medication to take care of my pain, not to be nervous. My husband never left my side the entire labor so he witnessed how the midwife did. But anyway, every time after that I said I hurt and was asking for epidural, the midwife would get on me and tell me I had to think about something else, my pain would "not be zero", I would hurt some. !!!! I was furious. Actually that was afterwards, during labor I was just upset and in a lot of pain. I feel the midwife was WAY wrong to deny me the epidural after it kept wearing off. My labor nurse said hers wore off every 2 hours also. Also, if the midwife had turned me over to the OB in the first place, soon after realizxing the baby wasn't coming out, I wonder if I would have as many stitches. They did not do episiotomy but I tore through the muscles and had a lot of stitches. The past few days I have been in excriciating pain. The midwives , every time I call them , get on me for mentioning the pain. They gave me Lortab which is ineffective and finally ended up giving me Percocet. But my bottom is SO sore. One of the midwives in the groups told me over the phone that they didn't think I hurt any more than anyone else, that it was my "anxiety" causing me to "think" I hurt bad. !!!!!!Then she said "Do you think that's what it is Jiiiiiiill?" My husband was in the room, and looked kind of surprised when I took a tone with her for the rest of the phone call. My husband had me call the midwife on call because he wanted them to meet me at the ER to make sure my stitches aren't coming out or I am not bleeding internally. I finally ended up calling the OB on call for the OBs office that the midwives partner with. I told him about all of this. He told me his wife had the same thing happen (had a tear through her muscles) and that it is very painful indeed and he knew that's what happened to me from what happened during labor and my description of the pain now. He's having me come in Monday to see the OB who delivered my baby to check me. He said unfortunately, the midwives don't like to treat pain with medicines, that the OBs are more pain-centered. I told him-- they told me at my initial consult that they had no problem giving you whatever pain relief you need- then I told him about the anxiety comment. He sort of couldn't believe that. But he also couldn't believe the midwife let me keep pushing when the baby was stuck, for 4 hours... Sigh..................I will not be seeing the midwives anymore. They were fantastic during my appointments but labor with them was hell. Their treatment after labor when I have been in very bad pain from the stitches, has been horrid too. My husband even commented that for no reason, they have been kind of attitudey and sarcastic, whenever the subject of pain or request for pain relief comes up and he agrees with me if they want to be unhelpful with it, they should have told me when I told them I didn't want a natural birth instead of telling me they give epidurals and whatever else the patient needs or prefers. But the bottom line is, my daughter is beautiful and worth it, perfect and healthy,and I would do it all over again to have her. Oh- the OB also told me if I HAD labored naturally without Pitocin, I probably really wouldn't have hurt as bad THEN as I did this time with the epidurals that wore off, because my contractions priobably wouldn't have been nearly as bad!! he also said a recovery from a c-section would potentially be less painful than recovery from the kind of tears and stitches I had. NOW they tell me! I think next time I will stick with an OB and have a doula, instead of a nurse-midwife. |
#24
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Midwives and my birth/story
Nikki wrote:
Circe wrote: Just an observation, but I didn't find pushing to be "the hardest bit" at all, at least not during my unmedicated labors. It was a bit harder during the one when I had an epidural, but that was because I couldn't feel what I was doing. Maybe I was just lucky and my babies were in good positions, but pushing just didn't take much effort on my part at all--certainly not nearly as much effort as *not* pushing would have been! The pushing just completely totally sucked with my #1 and was just peachy with my #2. With #1 I started pushing when they told me to. *Don't do that!!!*. It totally messed everything up and I never did get back on track. Wait until you feel the urge to push even if you are at 10cm for an hour first! That is my theory anyway :-) Even with my first, when I'd had an epidural and couldn't feel a blamed thing, I was able to get the head almost to crowning within about 20 minutes; I just couldn't get him "over the hump" so to speak so my OB got impatient and used the vacuum. Total pushing stage with #1 was only 30 minutes, though it obviously would have been longer without that intervention. #2 was out in 15 minutes and #3 out in under 5 minutes. But I guess you can see from that time progression why that *labor* part always seems "harder" to me than the "pushing" part g! I definitely agree with not pushing until you feel the urge to do so, unless you've had an epidural, in which case, you might not feel an urge at all. FWIW, I *do* think that Jill's midwives suggestion that she "labor down" and their desire for the epidural to have worn off in the pushing stage makes sense from a practical POV, even if it wasn't what Jill wanted. It's just generally a *lot* easier to push effectively when you can feel what's going on, and that's particularly true in a case where the baby isn't moving when you're pushing with an epidural. I know that when I had an epidural, I could only really feel that I was pushing correctly towards the very end of a contraction, which meant I really wasn't getting any value for my efforts until the last few seconds each time. I was just lucky to have a baby who was in a good position and (apparently) a very strong uterus that could do a lot of the work on its own. -- Be well, Barbara Mom to Sin (Vernon, 2), Misery (Aurora, 4), and the Rising Son (Julian, 6) Aurora (in the bathroom with her dad)--"It looks like an elephant, Daddy." Me (later)--"You should feel flattered." All opinions expressed in this post are well-reasoned and insightful. Needless to say, they are not those of my Internet Service Provider, its other subscribers or lackeys. Anyone who says otherwise is itchin' for a fight. -- with apologies to Michael Feldman |
#25
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Midwives and my birth/story
"Dagny" wrote in message news Jill What a nightmare. I don't know what to say except that I am very upset at what you experienced. I went through my own birth trauma last fall. Too much mental and physical damage. To as much recovery as we can, Dagny Mom to Meg, 10/03 and to a possibility, ?1/19/05? I am so glad others understand! It was truly completely mentally and physically draining. I was in so much pain even through yesterday and today that I got worked in with an OB just to make sure everything is healing ok etc. We figured out what was causing the pain and I think I am on the way back up now. But what an ordeal! The midwives weren't too happy I followed up with an OB they partner with- but that's really not their choice, is it? OTOH-- the OB that delivered Rachel was WONDERFUL. I plan to see him for my 6-week postnatal followup. He really took charge in delivery, and his reputation also preceded him. He is surprisingly young looking- I swear he looked like he's in his 20's. I was like "Oh here comes Doogie Howser!" LMAO(and actually, I think he MUST be in his 30's, and he is actually good looking unlike Doogie Howser)-- but, he is actually very very thorough and nitpicky and insisted that everything be done exactly his way, the right way, to the tee etc. The nurse told my husband that when he (OB) is on call, he can dial in from home and watch the computers of people who are in labor, that he might be needed to come attend to. He can see the baby, the contractions etc. So anyway, they told me the midwives at least had alerted him to the fact he might be needed after my first pushing, so he was monitoring it before he came in. And like I said, although I was already to be in for a painful recovery, he delivered my baby without me having to have a C and did a good job stitching me up. It helps to know others have BTDT. I still envy those with easy labors! I know several who breezed through. I am terrified to think I want 2 more kids! Jill |
#26
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Midwives and my birth/story
"Coccinella" wrote Anyway you got the best present a mother could wish for this past Mother's day! Congratulations again to you and DH and welcome to lovely Rachel. Wishing you a very speedy and complete recovery. Pampering vibes on your way. Thanks Nicky (and everyone!)....when I hold Rachel in my arms I really do forget everything else! I am trying to work on getting pictures up. She is a doll....she really brings me joy! Breastfeeding is still going great, she only cries when she's wet or hungry, and we are cosleeping- something I never thought I could do, but I can't rest if she's not there! Last night, we were all 3 asleep in bed, with Rachel in the middle with plenty of room on each side of her between her and Mommy and Daddy....I don't sleep too deeply since I always seem to have one ear on her breathing and cooing etc....I dozed off, and when I woke up, she was nestled up to me nursing! It was amazing...I don't know how she did that, she had to scoot a little bit to get latched on (I was wearing a nursing gown and I guess the flap was in the right position!).......that was sooooooooooo sweet and amazing feeling. I thought nursing would be time consuming and difficult at times (it is) but I had no idea how amazing it would feel, and how sweet my baby would seem to me etc....it's precious. Jill, Rachel's proud, proud, mama! 5/9/04 |
#27
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Midwives and my birth/story
"Elfanie" wrote There are nice and respectful and competent OB's...and there are doofus OB's who have no business practicing. Same for midwives. (same for doulas!) I understand your frustration at your postpartum treatment...and I'm sorry that your care providers haven't been more supportive. As for your labor and delivery - other than not being fast enough calling anesthesiologist for you, I'm not sure what else you think they could have done? Oh, I do want to point out-- even after my experience, I don't think these are horrendous midwives. They told me that I am one of few that have even been turned over to an OB. I believe that. Since they accept only low risk pregnancies. That is exactly the point, aside from the pain relief what do I think they could have done for me. I honestly and truly believe that in my case, that's ALL they could have done better for me, is to call the OB sooner (4 hours was too long to push esp. w/o pain relief, since I had pain relief as an important part of my birth plan), and to not let the epidural wear off. I don't fault the midwives for anything else, except the postpartum time when they kept bringing up "anxiety" "because you're on Paxil" etc. That was pretty crude. But other than that, honestly, I thnk these midwives are ok, just in hindsight, definitely not the best choice for me-- but we can't know that ahead of time. They were SUPER for my prenatal appointments. So really I am upset the most that they emphasized at my appointments that they fully support pain relief and emphasized they are willing to give each individual woman as much pain relief as she chooses to make her labor comfortable...then, they didn't! And actually, it blew me away when they called the anesthesiologist in and THEN told her not give me as much as I had last time . (The anesthesiologist wouldn't abide that though, because she said she may as well give me nothing then as it wouldn't be effective. ) My mom ran in to the anesthesiologist in the hallway, and asked her how I was and she said I was "not a happy camper", she could tell I was in pain. I still do appreciate my prenatal appointments. And the time they spent with me. Jill |
#28
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Midwives and my birth/story
Jill wrote:
I am so glad others understand! It was truly completely mentally and physically draining. I was in so much pain even through yesterday and today that I got worked in with an OB just to make sure everything is healing ok etc. We figured out what was causing the pain and I think I am on the way back up now. But what an ordeal! The midwives weren't too happy I followed up with an OB they partner with- but that's really not their choice, is it? No, it's not. As much as it makes me cringe a little bit when good midwifery practices are getting dumped for no good reason, that can't stand in the way of there being repercussions for midwives who are doing inappropriate things. It helps to know others have BTDT. I still envy those with easy labors! I know several who breezed through. I am terrified to think I want 2 more kids! Hang tough. Second labors tend to be much easier, and even more so by comparison when the first was particularly difficult. My first labor was 45 hours long. My second was only 2 and a half hours long! Best wishes, Ericka |
#29
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Midwives and my birth/story
Jill,
I ended up pushing for 6 or 7 hours I can't remember so I can understand. that was too long to push I remember asking for a c-section like 2 hours into pushing. Jennifer Ariana 8/17/03 home.earthlink.net/~soalus "Jill" wrote in message om... "Elfanie" wrote There are nice and respectful and competent OB's...and there are doofus OB's who have no business practicing. Same for midwives. (same for doulas!) I understand your frustration at your postpartum treatment...and I'm sorry that your care providers haven't been more supportive. As for your labor and delivery - other than not being fast enough calling anesthesiologist for you, I'm not sure what else you think they could have done? Oh, I do want to point out-- even after my experience, I don't think these are horrendous midwives. They told me that I am one of few that have even been turned over to an OB. I believe that. Since they accept only low risk pregnancies. That is exactly the point, aside from the pain relief what do I think they could have done for me. I honestly and truly believe that in my case, that's ALL they could have done better for me, is to call the OB sooner (4 hours was too long to push esp. w/o pain relief, since I had pain relief as an important part of my birth plan), and to not let the epidural wear off. I don't fault the midwives for anything else, except the postpartum time when they kept bringing up "anxiety" "because you're on Paxil" etc. That was pretty crude. But other than that, honestly, I thnk these midwives are ok, just in hindsight, definitely not the best choice for me-- but we can't know that ahead of time. They were SUPER for my prenatal appointments. So really I am upset the most that they emphasized at my appointments that they fully support pain relief and emphasized they are willing to give each individual woman as much pain relief as she chooses to make her labor comfortable...then, they didn't! And actually, it blew me away when they called the anesthesiologist in and THEN told her not give me as much as I had last time . (The anesthesiologist wouldn't abide that though, because she said she may as well give me nothing then as it wouldn't be effective. ) My mom ran in to the anesthesiologist in the hallway, and asked her how I was and she said I was "not a happy camper", she could tell I was in pain. I still do appreciate my prenatal appointments. And the time they spent with me. Jill |
#30
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Midwives and my birth/story
You said exactly what I was thinking as I read Jill's birth story. Well
said. -- Jamie & Taylor Earth Angel, 1/3/03 Check out Taylor Marlys -- www.MyFamily.com, User ID: Clarkguest, Password: Guest Become a member for free - go to Add Member to set up your own User ID and Password Handmade Baby Blankets -- www.geocities.com/digit_the_cat/Blankets.html "Karen" wrote in message ... My comments: - not such a good idea to head straight to the hospital after your water breaks if there are no contractions. Chances are awfully good that for a first baby, it isn't going to just appear from nowhere if there are no contractions! I'd wait many, many hours to see if labor starts on its own before heading to the hospital. - 18 hours from beginning to end for a first baby is average, maybe a little less, for a first baby. For my first, it was around 25 hours. I felt that was pretty good! - not sure where you got the idea that birth would be pain free, even with an epidural. I've never had one, but I believe at the hospital I use, it's standard to wait until the mother is 5 cm. I've always had a lot of pain to deal with getting from 0-5 myself (drug free births). It's not like transition, but it hurts. - I totally sympathize with you regarding Pitocin. Some people think it's no big deal. My water broke with my first with no ensuing labor. I went to the hospital after 12 hours and got Pitocin. I handle pain quite well, but Pitocin put me on a roller coaster of contractions that gave me no rest. It was wild! I think I may have been insane to do it without an epidural, in hindsight. However, I now have the confidence to know I can handle anything! - The worst thing about epidurals, IMO, is that unless they are walking, they do often impede the progress of the baby. I had to have a brief vacuum with my first, as his head was stuck - once he got moved down via vacuum, I was able to push him out on my own. I think it's just a bad, bad idea to lie down during labor at all. - the good news is that a first birth that does not meet your expectations usually results in a mother who knows what she wants for her second! Now you can talk from experience. My second birth was idyllic and a romp in the park. I got every single thing I wanted...no...insisted upon. Written birth plans help a lot. When you are experienced, you will be taken more seriously. However, I think it's contradictory to lay yourself at their feet and say you'll do anything but then get very worked up about having any pain. It's better IMO to learn ways of dealing with pain, of reaching inside yourself to cope, and if an epidural is your thing, then relishing the pain free periods. While being fully aware that epidurals slow down labor, make pushing less effective, and often don't completely work. You gotta take the bad with the good and take responsibility for your choices. This is childbirth, after all! Every labor is different, even if you have the same plan. But unless they fully knock you out at the first contraction, you are going to feel pain. And since the health of the baby was paramount, they probably did put the baby ahead of you. Congrats. Enjoy that baby! Karen |
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