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Expulsion Notification



 
 
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  #1  
Old May 22nd 06, 02:26 PM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Over the weekend, at a neighborhood party, I learned that
4 of DD's classmates had been suspended, and maybe expelled
for smoking pot in the boys' room (during the last class
period!). If such a thing happened in your kid's school,
would you expect some kind of notification from the
principal alerting you to what had happened? (This is
7th grade, by the way). DD said it's been the talk of the
school, among her classmates. I guess I'd like to have
heard something from the administration, not from a
parent whose kid happened to mention something.

Scott DD 12 and DS 10

  #2  
Old May 22nd 06, 08:48 PM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Scott L wrote:
Over the weekend, at a neighborhood party, I learned that
4 of DD's classmates had been suspended, and maybe expelled
for smoking pot in the boys' room (during the last class
period!). If such a thing happened in your kid's school,
would you expect some kind of notification from the
principal alerting you to what had happened? (This is
7th grade, by the way).


Short answer.... no. This incident does not pose any sort of threat
for my child, which would be my threshold for feeling entitled to be
"in the know." In my mind it's between the school, the students and
their parents.

I think you have to think about stuff like this from the point of view
of the other parents/kids. If your child made this mistake, would you
want an official notice going around about the incident? Even without
names, as you say it becomes the talk of the school and those names get
out.

It's also a law enforcement issue if they have police in the middle
schools where you live (we do). That raises all of the juvenile
justice rules about confidentiality.

And, from the school's point of view, any sort of official notice
invites second-guessing regarding the school's disciplinary steps, and
probably makes it harder to give kids a second chance if they feel it's
warranted. This type of incident could be all over the map -- could be
the time they *finally* caught a group that has been troublesome for a
long time, or could be a group of normally well-behaved kids who got a
hold of a single joint and made a spectacularly bad choice. The school
needs some leeway in handling these situations IMO, and the fewer
parents involved, the better.

-Dawn
Mom to a 7th grader, too ;-)

  #3  
Old May 22nd 06, 08:49 PM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Default Expulsion Notification

In article ,
Scott L wrote:

Over the weekend, at a neighborhood party, I learned that
4 of DD's classmates had been suspended, and maybe expelled
for smoking pot in the boys' room (during the last class
period!). If such a thing happened in your kid's school,
would you expect some kind of notification from the
principal alerting you to what had happened? (This is
7th grade, by the way). DD said it's been the talk of the
school, among her classmates. I guess I'd like to have
heard something from the administration, not from a
parent whose kid happened to mention something.

Scott DD 12 and DS 10


No, I wouldn't expect notification.

Why would I?

What information do you think you should have that would make a
difference to anything you would do with your own child?

I don't expect the school to notify me every time some other student
does something that results in suspension or even expulsion: that is a
private matter between that student, his or her parents or guardians,
and the school, and none of anyone else's business. If my child had
been directly involved in the incident, I might expect something -- but
even then, by the time they are 12, if they are only a witness to
something, I wouldn't expect the school to contact me unless they had
been obviously traumatized. (I WOULD expect the school to cooperate and
share such information as they could without compromising the other
student's rights if I called because my child came home upset.)

I would expect to be told of what the school's policies are regarding
drugs and alcohol, and regarding discipline. If something became an
ongoing problem, I would expect the school to be keeping in touch with
parents. However, I can't imagine any school notifying all the parents
every time an incident like this takes place.

Chances are excellent, this is NOT the first time a 7th grader has been
caught with drugs at this school (unless the school is brand new), and
you are going to hear more and more of this sort of thing as your kids
get older: drugs, sex, tobacco, alcohol -- they all exist all over, and
schools have to deal with them.

In the years my kids were in school, there were VERY few times parents
were notified of something; I can only recall two, and they were for
things FAR more challenging than some kids caught with pot in the
bathroom. One involved a car/pedestrian injury in front of the school
(a student was hurt badly when a driver ran a red light), and the other
involved an honest-to-god police chase right through the high school
campus. In the second case, there was plenty of press about what
happened, so the school sent home a letter confirming the facts,
explaining that no students were involved in ANYTHING, and reiterating
what their policies and procedures were.
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

  #4  
Old May 22nd 06, 09:08 PM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Default Expulsion Notification

In article , Scott L says...


Over the weekend, at a neighborhood party, I learned that
4 of DD's classmates had been suspended, and maybe expelled
for smoking pot in the boys' room (during the last class
period!). If such a thing happened in your kid's school,
would you expect some kind of notification from the
principal alerting you to what had happened? (This is
7th grade, by the way). DD said it's been the talk of the
school, among her classmates. I guess I'd like to have
heard something from the administration, not from a
parent whose kid happened to mention something.


Kids are expelled or suspended for any number of reasons, none of the ones I've
learned of via the grapevine would have been of benefit neither to the community
nor to the child if the reasons were broadcast. I would expect a policy which
respected privacy, while leaving open the possibility of notification if there
were an issue of public health, or something like that, involved. Notification
only if the community as a whole needed to know about it, and only what the
community as a whole needed to know about it specifically.

I wouldn't put the pot incident in the latter category. There would be nothing
new to be learned from that, is there.

My school district did send a notice to parents about MyPlace and some problems
observed with it. However it didn't, and needn't have, described the particular
incident that preciptated the concern.

That would, to me, be a better model of how a school district should handle such
things. But I wouldn't expect a general announcement about expulsions.

Banty


--


  #5  
Old May 23rd 06, 01:12 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Default Expulsion Notification


I wouldn't expect to hear anything from the administration on disciplinary
actions that did not involve my kid. Think about it, if your child, in a
rare lapse of judgement, did something spectactularly stupid, would you want
the administration broadcasting it to everyone, or would you prefer they
take care of it between you, them, and your child?

  #6  
Old May 23rd 06, 03:17 PM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Default Expulsion Notification

Cathy Kearns wrote:
I wouldn't expect to hear anything from the administration on disciplinary
actions that did not involve my kid. Think about it, if your child, in a
rare lapse of judgement, did something spectactularly stupid, would you want
the administration broadcasting it to everyone, or would you prefer they
take care of it between you, them, and your child?


I suppose it depends on the legality of it, or on whether
it endangers others. I think my kids know, though, how
fast the grapevine works in this town. There are so
few secrets.

Thanks for your responses. As I noted in an email to
one, part of my reaction is tied to general frustration
with the new administrators at DD's school. There was
a *big* staff turnover last Summer. It's not been a
smooth transition.

Don't even get me started on DS's principal.

Scott DD 12 and DS 10

  #7  
Old May 23rd 06, 07:31 PM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Default Expulsion Notification


Scott L wrote:
Over the weekend, at a neighborhood party, I learned that
4 of DD's classmates had been suspended, and maybe expelled
for smoking pot in the boys' room (during the last class
period!). If such a thing happened in your kid's school,
would you expect some kind of notification from the
principal alerting you to what had happened?


I wouldn't expect any kind of notification, as others say this is
matter between the students involved, their parents, and the
administration. When we have had similar type incidents in MS/HS there
has sometimes been a generic letter mailed home restating school policy
about some behavior. We also will sometimes get a note about incidents
that occurred near school (suspicious car stopping at a bus stop,
police activity that did not include students but was on school
grounds, etc.) These are either "alerts" or "informational."

I've noticed as my kids move from daycare to preschool to elementary to
MS and now to HS, the amount of information I have gets less and less
and the kids are less and less willing to share. At every transition I
have to remind myself of this new stage and readjust my expectations.

Chris

Chris

  #8  
Old May 24th 06, 04:43 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Default Expulsion Notification

On Mon, 22 May 2006 09:26:07 EDT, Scott L
wrote:


Over the weekend, at a neighborhood party, I learned that
4 of DD's classmates had been suspended, and maybe expelled
for smoking pot in the boys' room (during the last class
period!). If such a thing happened in your kid's school,
would you expect some kind of notification from the
principal alerting you to what had happened? (This is
7th grade, by the way). DD said it's been the talk of the
school, among her classmates. I guess I'd like to have
heard something from the administration, not from a
parent whose kid happened to mention something.


In the school district I work in, it is not allowed to tell other
parents about any disciplinary actions taken against a child who is
not theirs. It is a privacy and legal rights concern. OTOH, would
you want an announcement to go out from admin to all parents in the
school if your daughter had been caught smoking pot and was being
suspended or expelled? Would you feel that was fair? I think often
the school is happy that the grapevine gets the word out to those who
might want to be more careful in what they do, who they hang out with
or who they let their children hang out with, but they can't do it
themselves.

--
Paula
"Anyway, other people are weird, but sometimes they have candy,
so it's best to try to get along with them." Joe Bay

  #9  
Old May 24th 06, 10:44 AM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Default Expulsion Notification


"Scott L" wrote in message
...

Over the weekend, at a neighborhood party, I learned that
4 of DD's classmates had been suspended, and maybe expelled
for smoking pot in the boys' room (during the last class
period!). If such a thing happened in your kid's school,
would you expect some kind of notification from the
principal alerting you to what had happened? (This is
7th grade, by the way). DD said it's been the talk of the
school, among her classmates. I guess I'd like to have
heard something from the administration, not from a
parent whose kid happened to mention something.

Scott DD 12 and DS 10


No, I would not expect the school to send out notifications. I would expect
that the school would send out notices if there was an outbreak of serious
illness or safety issues. However, I would not expect to school to send out
a notice that a seventh grader was smoking pot.

Some schools are required to publish summary statistics about things like
suspensions,vandalism and assaults, however. All NYC schools do this.

Jeff

  #10  
Old May 25th 06, 07:58 PM posted to misc.kids.moderated
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Default Expulsion Notification

yes you would like to be notified. i would to. but i wouldnt expect to.
sadly this kind of behaviour goes on all to often and much worse
happens in school too. where do they draw the line between respecting
peoples privacy and informing parents what is really going on in our
childrens schools

 




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