Bright 2nd grader & school truancy / part-time home-school?

Ericka Kammerer wrote in message ...
We had planned to talk at school conferences about keeping dd home one day
per week, or bi-weekly, to enhance her education. But from what I've read
about truancy laws tonight, this doesn't seem to be allowable. Has anyone
done this or know if it is doable?


I suspect this would not go over well. I would think
it would be *highly* disruptive to the teacher and the rest
of the class. I would either homeschool full time, leave things
as they are, or look for enrichment through the school
(GT programs, etc.). You'd be asking a *lot* of the teacher.
He or she would have to figure out how to make sure your
child suffered no ill effects from missing up to 20 percent
of the class! That would mean no quizzes/tests or other
assessments on that day, no special activities, etc. I
would think that would be pretty unreasonable to request.


Have others faced this truancy problem? How do you approach it? If this is
a law (5 days/semester,) does the principal have much leeway in enforcing
it? If not, then who do we talk with? The DA? Is it possible to
homeschool part-time (the days dd misses) and avoid a truancy enforcement?
Could we test out of second grade and attendance be optional?


I hear what you're trying to accomplish, but I
would be very surprised if you could get where you're
trying to go. I think you're going to find that homeschooling
is an all or nothing thing. If you think that's really the
way you need to go, then I think you could solve the problem
by homeschooling full time and taking care to get well
involved in your local homeschooling community so that
she builds new networks of friends. If not, I'd try to
make a commitment to finding the challenge she needs with
this (or another) school.

In regards to the part-time homeschooling issue. I see a lot of
responses like this, basically saying it's all or nothing, so just
forget about part-time homeschooling. That's not true, though it is
dependent on how supportive your school is. I'm not acquainted with
anyone who's done it as one or two days of week of homeschooling, but
I know more than one person who has, at around that age, sent their
child to school for half the day and homeschooled the other half.
Generally, they've been pleased with the arrangement. If you are
interested in part-time homeschooling, I strongly recommend you bring
up with your child's teacher and see what she is willing to do to
accomodate you. If you can reach an agreement with her, it's likely
the two of you can convince the administration to go along.

Beth Clarkson

In article , Ericka Kammerer says...

Banty wrote:
[ socializing outside one's classroom]


Really??

I guess that doesn't jibe with my experience at all, either as a child or a
parent of a child. As a kid, we socialized in the neighborhood. We always
lived on base and there were tons of kids. A lot of the kids went to Catholic
schools, but after playing together all summer and evenings and weekends, it
wasn't a big deal. So moving with the same kids, going into neighborhoods with
the same kids (just different arrangements of houses) really put out in relief
that suddenly it was supposed to be bad to talk to most of my friends anymore.


I can certainly see how that would be so if the
prohibition on socializing extended beyond the school day.
My point was that I was just wondering outside of the
unusual situation you experienced, how would most of those
student know people outside their "circle" anyway, given
that school-based friendships would come almost entirely
from the classroom anyway. I guess I was assuming that
neighborhood friends and friends from other activities
would be unaffected by this odd school division, but
apparently it extended beyond school?


??

Perhaps you're thinking of a program where the kids are together in a class even
for lunch and PE and recess and everything else?

By junior high, those between-class periods and - especially - who sits with who
during lunch, and PE which mixes classes (at least did for the program I was
in), and in recess in earlier grades the kids see each other. And often
gravitate to their neighborhood friends. It doesn't have to extend beyond
school.


A generation later, my son has neighborhood friends - again lots of boys in our
neighborhood. And then cub scouts is a big base of friendship, for both parents
and children, and this included kids from different schools. In my son's
birthday parties I'd say the guests are 1) neighborhood 2) scouts 3) classroom.
And the bonds form most when they have two connections, like a friend of a
neighborhood friend who is also in a class with my son.


Right, same here. Well, different activities, but
same principle ;-) But when it comes to kids they have no
ties with other than school, my boys only have school
friends from their classrooms because they don't really
have a chance to mingle much with school kids who aren't
in their classes (past or present).


I agree that it's not a simple thing - bright nerdy kids like me definately get
harassed and I had my share of problems. In one sense it was wonderful to be
with other bright kids, but I *had* made connections outside that category over
the years, and that was pretty much a hard-won thing. That they were suddenly
so uncool was really a shock. I think it affected my outlook on how people
choose friends and about certain superficial aspects of socializing and
connections and even networking in adult life.


Absolutely. I wonder where that segregation came
from? I would expect some small degree of us-vs-them with
any segregated program, but it seems like it was really
excessive where you were.

I don't think it was excessive so much that the social expectations were much
apparent to those of us who came from unsegregated classes from another state
because it was so different where we came from.
Kids who had been in the NH system all along pretty much knew each other already
and not the other kids and it had developed over time. We were like a new tribe
coming in, and being told that certain members of our tribe were suddenly very
uncool. Our unique situation made the segregatation that much more starkly
clear. (Funny using this word 'segregation' concering this situation, although
it fits. In 1967, with a large group of kids suddenly coming in to a New
Hampshire school district from Texas, they assumed we'd be trying to maintain a
different kind of segregation! That was another piece of weirdness I can tell
you about another time.)

Banty

Banty wrote:


This still doesn't make sense to me. Do they ignore the friends they have from
the neighborhood and scouts when they go to recess, or what?


There really isn't much of any opportunity. Recess isn't
long, and there are only a few classes out there at any given
time so the odds that friends would be there aren't great
anyway. Right now, I think there's only one other class out
there while my 3rd grader is at recess, though maybe all the
1st grade classes are out at the same time for my other son.
They sit with their classes at lunch. *Occasionally* there
are other times for interaction with other classes, but those
are relatively structured, like the grade level meetings
with the principal once a month or assemblies or field trips.
During the school day there just aren't many opportunities!
Sure, when there are things like the Back to School Picnic
or Fun Fair or whatever they'll interact with the kids they
know from other contexts, but those things don't happen
often enough to make and maintain new friendships not
established in other places. Also, we live in a fairly
densely populated area. Most of the kids my kids encounter
in their other activities do not go to their school.
About half the neighborhood kids do, but they barely
see those kids at school unless they happen to share a
classroom. My older son's best friend is a neighborhood
friend who was in his kindergarten class. They've maintained
the friendship, but they hardly ever see each other in
school (they haven't shared a classroom since kindy).

Best wishes,
Ericka

Banty wrote:

In article , Ericka Kammerer says...

from the classroom anyway. I guess I was assuming that
neighborhood friends and friends from other activities
would be unaffected by this odd school division, but
apparently it extended beyond school?

??

Perhaps you're thinking of a program where the kids are together in a class even
for lunch and PE and recess and everything else?


I hadn't realized before your last post that you
were talking about jr. high. I was thinking in terms
of elementary school. In my son's elementary school,
they have lunch as a class. I think they sometimes mix
two classes together in PE, but there's not a lot of
time for socializing there. As I said in another post,
there's also only limited interaction at recess.


By junior high, those between-class periods and - especially - who sits with who
during lunch, and PE which mixes classes (at least did for the program I was
in), and in recess in earlier grades the kids see each other. And often
gravitate to their neighborhood friends. It doesn't have to extend beyond
school.


I don't know what it will be like for my kids
when they get to jr. high, but I was in the same program
my older son is now in this school district when I was
in jr. high (egads...can it really be 25 years ago!?).
We did mingle at lunch, but there was almost no between
class time (barely enough to get from class to class if
you hustled). I moved into the area for 7th grade and
was put into this center-based program. Unlike kids not
in the program, I was with the same group of kids for all
my core academics and was then mainstreamed for PE and band
(and maybe one or two other classes over two years--I forget
which, precisely). Anyway, because I had a good four classes
with the same group of people, I knew them best and gravitated
toward them to find friends. To be honest, I didn't really
know most of the kids in the neighborhood, perhaps because
we'd just moved in and I was very busy with other activities
and I wasn't much of a social butterfly anyway. So I *did*
have most of my friends within the program, but I think that
was much more because those were the people I spent the most
time with, not because there was any sense that it was "wrong"
to be interacting with others. I guess I find the sense of
segregation you experienced very odd, but not the fact that
kids would primarily socialize within the group they spend
the most time with, which in my experience would be the
classroom group. I'm sure others are perhaps more shaped
by neighborhood friendships or friendships from church/scouts/
whatever, but I think the classroom is a biggie for a *lot*
of kids. It certainly was for me (though as a military brat
I often didn't have many neighborhood friends) and for my
kids (even though they *do* have many neighborhood friends).


Absolutely. I wonder where that segregation came
from? I would expect some small degree of us-vs-them with
any segregated program, but it seems like it was really
excessive where you were.

I don't think it was excessive so much that the social expectations were much
apparent to those of us who came from unsegregated classes from another state
because it was so different where we came from.
Kids who had been in the NH system all along pretty much knew each other already
and not the other kids and it had developed over time. We were like a new tribe
coming in, and being told that certain members of our tribe were suddenly very
uncool. Our unique situation made the segregatation that much more starkly
clear.


Yes, I can see that, and also that it could be
something very invisible unless a unique situation like
yours came along to cast some light on it. Still, I
think if the same thing had happened in the system I was
in for jr. high you might have found little *time* to
interact with the kids not on the program at school, but
I would be surprised if you would have found any sense
that interacting with kids outside the program was uncool.
Could be wrong, of course, but it would surprise me. I
would have been somewhat less surprised if there was
some animosity in the other direction, though.

(Funny using this word 'segregation' concering this situation, although
it fits. In 1967, with a large group of kids suddenly coming in to a New
Hampshire school district from Texas, they assumed we'd be trying to maintain a
different kind of segregation! That was another piece of weirdness I can tell
you about another time.)


I can only imagine... ;-)

Best wishes,
Ericka

"Beth" wrote in message
om...
Ericka Kammerer wrote in message
...
We had planned to talk at school conferences about keeping dd home one
day
per week, or bi-weekly, to enhance her education. But from what I've
read
about truancy laws tonight, this doesn't seem to be allowable. Has
anyone
done this or know if it is doable?

In regards to the part-time homeschooling issue. I see a lot of
responses like this, basically saying it's all or nothing, so just
forget about part-time homeschooling. That's not true, though it is
dependent on how supportive your school is. I'm not acquainted with
anyone who's done it as one or two days of week of homeschooling, but
I know more than one person who has, at around that age, sent their
child to school for half the day and homeschooled the other half.
Generally, they've been pleased with the arrangement. If you are
interested in part-time homeschooling, I strongly recommend you bring
up with your child's teacher and see what she is willing to do to
accomodate you. If you can reach an agreement with her, it's likely
the two of you can convince the administration to go along.

I think Beth has a great point. If your second grade has a scheduled
time everyday you could pick a subject and always pull out during
that subject. That way the teacher doesn't have to worry about
your child missing tests or ensuring she makes up work.

Another option you might consider is a school that encourages
independent study. Montessori schools fall into this catagory,
I know there is a small private school near here that goes year
round, but the kids are only required to attend a certain number
of days, but they can pick their own holidays and vacation days.
This would allow you to pick the days your child attends, and
you could pull out at will.

Since you are already donating time and money to your school
it's apparent you have the time and money to go toward a
private school. The biggest disadvantage of public schools
is the rules are made by those who hold the purse strings. If
you have no money you have to hope the local schools are good
enough. But the idea of public schooling is how to best school
everyone, as a whole, not everyone individually.


Beth Clarkson

"Vicki" wrote in message
news
Today we received a warning letter for truancy for our 2nd grader. The
principal said she was concerned about dd's absences. I am not concerned
about dd's absences--she is bright, she knows the material [she's missed
five days this month, but received 100 on her test for materials covered.]
I don't think the teacher is concerned. But the principal said dd is only
allowed 5 excused absences per semester.

I'm not happy about the possibility of legal sanctions for keeping dd home
(she was sick this month, but I wouldn't hesitate to take her out of
school
for other things we feel are important.) Can they prosecute us for
truancy
when dd is top of her class? I don't see the harm to anyone in dd not
going. And she *will* miss more school at Thanksgiving (important family
time.)


I'm not sure if you are talking about US public schools (actually I'm going
with
US schools, since you mention Thanksgiving coming up) and I'm not sure
about the state. But if your child were in a state where the schools work
like they do here in California, your principal is stuck between a rock and
a hard place. If your child has more than 5 excused absenses in a
semester the state quits paying the per diem for your child for the days she
isn't there. If that adds up to quite a few day, they need to cut their
budget
to account for that missed income. The state requires they file for truency
to get the missed money.

We had planned to talk at school conferences about keeping dd home one day
per week, or bi-weekly, to enhance her education. But from what I've read
about truancy laws tonight, this doesn't seem to be allowable. Has anyone
done this or know if it is doable?

dd does not want to homeschool full-time--she likes seeing her friends at
school and we think this is good for her. We have discussed getting
appropriate challenge in her classroom--the teacher has been helpful, but
there is only so much she can do. We chose not to skip dd to the next
grade
as she is already the youngest in her class.

Have others faced this truancy problem? How do you approach it? If this
is
a law (5 days/semester,) does the principal have much leeway in enforcing
it? If not, then who do we talk with? The DA? Is it possible to
homeschool part-time (the days dd misses) and avoid a truancy enforcement?
Could we test out of second grade and attendance be optional?

I'm not sure about the homeschooling part-time, I've seen waivers for PE
for elite athletes, so there is some flexibility, but I'm not sure how much.
Certainly at the local school if you plan on traveling during the school
year they can give work for completion during the trip that allows them
to get the per diem funding. As for testing out of second grade, I'm
betting you could test out of second grade, but then why would the
state want to pay for your child attending?

dh is calling the principal next week, and we will meet with dd's teacher
in
three weeks. I'd like to have a sense of our options before we go so we
do
what's right by dd and cause the least distress to her teacher and
principal
(who are quite nice.) Any help would be greatly appreciated.

They are looking at it from two perspectives, how can I best meet the
educational needs of this child, and how can I make it so I can pay
people to best meet the educational needs of this child. If you move
her to private school the second part of the equation goes away. If
your child is hitting her educational milestones, private schools can
give much more leeway. Since you are paying tuition no matter
how many days your daughter attends school they don't have
to worry about cutting programs if you decide to spend interesting
time elsewhere with her. This is why actors, politicians, and others
with the means who tend to pull their kids out for extended periods
during the school year tend to put their kids in private schools.
Even if the public schools are wonderful, they don't have the financial
leeway private school have when it comes to funding.

For someone like yourself looking for maximum flexibility when
it comes to attendance, yet no worries about whether your child
can keep up, I'd highly recommend private schools where funding
is dropped from the equation.

Thank you.
Vicki

"Ericka Kammerer" wrote in message
...
I certainly won't contest your impression of your
district, as I have no experience of it. We have a similar
program (center based GT program), however, and it is *totally*
different. The kids are delightful, very well behaved, and
highly supportive of the school and school programs--not to
mention that their parents are some of the most highly
active in the whole school, and their efforts benefit the
*whole* school, not just the center based GT part. I'll
agree that the label is unfortunate, though I'm not
sure what the program ought to be called.

I doesn't matter what it's called, everyone will know what it means. We had
a blue bird, red bird program at school where the excellerated readers
started school a little later. The labels didn't mention gifted or
talented, just a different colored bird, but everyone knew what it meant.

"Vicki" wrote in message
news
Today we received a warning letter for truancy for our 2nd grader. The
principal said she was concerned about dd's absences. I am not concerned
about dd's absences--she is bright, she knows the material [she's missed
five days this month, but received 100 on her test for materials covered.]
I don't think the teacher is concerned. But the principal said dd is only
allowed 5 excused absences per semester.

I'm not happy about the possibility of legal sanctions for keeping dd home
(she was sick this month, but I wouldn't hesitate to take her out of
school
for other things we feel are important.) Can they prosecute us for
truancy
when dd is top of her class? I don't see the harm to anyone in dd not
going. And she *will* miss more school at Thanksgiving (important family
time.)

We had planned to talk at school conferences about keeping dd home one day
per week, or bi-weekly, to enhance her education. But from what I've read
about truancy laws tonight, this doesn't seem to be allowable. Has anyone
done this or know if it is doable?

dd does not want to homeschool full-time--she likes seeing her friends at
school and we think this is good for her. We have discussed getting
appropriate challenge in her classroom--the teacher has been helpful, but
there is only so much she can do. We chose not to skip dd to the next
grade
as she is already the youngest in her class.

I feel for you... I was in the position your daughter is in now when I was
in school. Your story makes me so grateful for my daughter's school program.

I went into her kindergarten year prepared to fight. I insisted she be
tested (and she was "diagnosed" as highly gifted) because a test result
actually gives us legal rights to accelerated and enriched course matter. In
kindergarten, it wasn't much of an issue, because the academic stuff wasn't
"the point". She was only in school for 2 or 3 hours a day, and most of
that was figuring out how to be in a group, follow the rules, etc.

In first grade, she started the Family School program. This is a small
"school within a school" alternative program in our district, a public
magnet school (entrance by lottery.)

Her classroom had grades 1-3. 24 kids. Now, if a teacher can teach 24 kids
from 3 grades all day long and keep them all interested and learning, then
CERTAINLY a teacher should be able to provide gifted kids within a
single-grade classroom with enriched material. If they can't, they're not
being creative. All the 1-3 teachers at my daughter's school did it and did
it well.

I balk at the notion that a parent should "have" to homeschool to get a
gifted child what they need (although I would have yanked my kid out of
school so fast if it hadn't been great for her...) or that it should take
"extra" time outside of school hours. Kids are in school for what, 29-30
hours per week? That's PLENTY to learn what they need to learn. No, bright
kids should not end up doing make-work or busy-work when they already know
and understand the material, particularly not in grades 1-3. And if it only
takes her 4 days to learn what it takes the teacher 5 to teach...well, why
not do something else with the extra day?

My daughter is now in her 5th year (5th grade) at Family School. It is a
less "age diverse" class (they generally put all the 5th graders together)
but her teacher, nevertheless, has engaged my daughter in learning like
never before.

Some of the ways bright kids can "get more out" of existing units.

Rather than doing ordinary spelling like the other kids, the better spellers
are in "dictionary" spelling where they basically pick out their own words.
My daughter picked out some I can't even pronounce...two weeks ago it was
antidisestablishmentarianism and
pneumoultramicroscopicvolcanosilicoconiosis. Last week it was a word I've
dubbed the "flua hua" word, because it's a zillion letters long and I really
can't pronounce it. She can, though! (she always laughs when I try it...so I
get very silly about it calling it the "floxihilipilifilifluapuapication
word") And hippopotomonstrosoquipedilian (or something like that), a word
which means "long"... g I thought I had a good vocabulary--but when I was
in school, kids teased me for using long words so I started avoiding them.
She delights in them! This works best when kids are not all thrown the same
stuff but are sub-grouped. Often groups can work together to learn and
choose words, which is why one teacher can teach so many levels at once--the
kids help each other, which helps them learn too. Other kids in my
daughter's class are hunting down long words, too, now...the right kind of
peer pressure.

When writing assignments are given, in a 1-3 class, the first graders write
a few sentences and draw a picture. The third graders write a few
paragraphs. The brighter kids might write a page or two. In fifth grade, my
daughter is touch-typing 1-2 page papers.

Reading...is always at the kid's level. (Oh, they are not "graded" on their
papers. Kids are evaluated based on how well they are meeting expectations,
what they excel at and what they need to work on, but they are not "graded"
to compare them with other kids.) So you might have slow learning 3rd
graders still working on sounding things out. And quick learning 2nd graders
reading chapter books. In 5th grade my kid is in the teacher's "private book
club", where the teacher picks out books for her (3 per week) with a
challenge to read as many as she can. These are real books that the teacher
loves, and she seems to pick them out for each kid separately.

Math is done by grade level, but is so open-ended that kids who fly get to
work on really neat logic problems and word problems while kids who are
working on the basic concepts spend more time with teacher and
helping/getting help from peers (who are used to such things and don't judge
people by it.) The only "rote work" assignments are phrased such that the
kids who consider them "really easy" treat them as races (How fast can you
do it accurately?) and those who need them still have them. I suspect that
the teacher wrote one of the logic puzzles just for my kid--because it
involved food allergies (which she has) and is exactly the sort of puzzle my
kid (and the rest of the family, in fact) adore. We had great fun sorting
out which kids lived in which houses and which parents bought which treats
and who wore what costume.

Her school has always done a zillion field trips. They fund raise for them,
and ask parents for money, get donations from the community, walk to the
trips rather than bussing, take city buses rather than renting a bus, car
pool, etc. to make the trips affordable. They go 2 hrs. north to OMSI to see
the science museum there. They go to the public works plant for a tour. They
go to the library. They go out to a farm. They ride bikes as a group across
town on a bike path to see a bike shop which makes eccentric vehicles like
3-person bikes and adult tricycles.

The upshot is, my "highly gifted" kid has been educated right along with all
the other kids for the past 5 years and aside from insisting on some
alternatives to learning the alphabet (which she knew before she was 2) in
K, I've not had to play the "gifted" card since she started 1st grade. Her
teachers just provide *all* the kids with a good education, no matter how
slow or fast they learn. All children learn better from an enriched,
interesting educational environment. ALL children can benefit from hands-on
learning.

We have a terrible budget crunch. But the school adapts. The kids don't seem
to notice, although it certainly has made life harder for parents and
teachers alike. But with less than average money resources this school
manages to put it together in such a way that parents, kids AND teachers are
passionately committed to the program and each other.

If school seems pointless... find another option. Because it really doesn't
have to be that way.

In my daughter's younger classes (I haven't asked since), I asked once how
many kids were on Ritalin.

The answer?

None.

They managed to teach all the kids without any of them being drugged. They
were not required to sit still all day. They were not required to do lots of
busywork assignments. When my daughter went a quarter without turning in
homework, all of us sat down together to find out why. Turns out she was
bored with it. So the teachers okayed her turning in something else (we used
worksheets from a math workbook she liked at a higher grade level), and I
insisted that homework be her first priority every night. Now she does
homework without being prompted, and the seldom-thought-about rule is "no
computer or TV before homework." She does her homework first. I do not allow
her to do more than 10 min x grade level per night. So she knows that as
long as she works hard at it for 50 minutes (this year), when that 50
minutes is over, she's done. There's no fight about it. (well, she argued
once for an exception, I didnt' give in, it ended up taking less than half
the usual time anyway....)

When the program can't adapt wholesale to all the kids the way my daughter's
school does, even so, teachers can adapt for specific kids. Yeah, I know
it's more work. But if they can't teach in a way which keeps all the kids
interested, more work is what they've created for themselves. Let a child
pretest through material.... if she's done early, have something related but
"deeper" for her to look at herself. If a whole section is clearly something
she already knows, give her an alternate project. Don't make a big deal
about it to the class--do it quietly.

So many bright kids are just "lost" when the school fails to give them
meaningful work. I never learned good study skills--my daughter is already
far better at academic discipline than I am. Why? Because I skated through,
rarely challenged, and she has been taught to seek out challenge and work
methodically. Recently the teacher sent home a survey to find out how the
kids were feeling about homework... it said something like, "Draw a picture
of how you feel about your homework." The picture was a side-view of water,
and they were supposed to indicate whetehr they were "drowning" "just
keeping their heads up" or otherwise. My kid drew herself walking on water
and said, "Need more homework."

She had more homework within the week, and was glad of it.

Jenrose

"dejablues" wrote in message
...

"Vicki" wrote in message
news
Today we received a warning letter for truancy for our 2nd grader. The
principal said she was concerned about dd's absences. I am not
concerned
about dd's absences--she is bright, she knows the material [she's missed
five days this month, but received 100 on her test for materials
covered.]
I don't think the teacher is concerned. But the principal said dd is
only
allowed 5 excused absences per semester.

I'm not happy about the possibility of legal sanctions for keeping dd
home
(she was sick this month, but I wouldn't hesitate to take her out of
school
for other things we feel are important.)

You are teaching your daughter that it is OK to skip out on things that
she
*has* to do in order to do things she (or you ) *wants* to do.


sigh
My daughter's school doesn't even blink if a kid misses a day for something
the parent thinks is important. If kids need to leave early for a music
lesson, they bend over backward to make it easy. They're being taught to
balance priorities in their lives, and it just so happens that for most of
the kids, they love school and school is a high priority and they don't want
to miss it for anything. Some kids miss occasionally for the start of an SCA
event, for example, or a major family trip, or whatnot. But you know, in
real life, people GET to make special plans to rearrange their lives around
the occasional special event or opportunity.

If my daughter was doing such a **** poor job of educating her that it
didn't feel like a missed day would even matter, I wouldn't mind pulling her
now and then either. As it is, she loves school, hates missing a day, and
we have to browbeat her into missing once in a while for things where it
just doesn't "work" for us to send her to school that day (i.e. when we go
to a special once-a-year event for the weekend and must leave Friday.) But
the school and her teachers don't mind.

Funny thing... I found a job myself where the day they hired me they said,
"We know you're a parent and we want you to know that your family comes
first."

I can miss a day "just because" and not lose my job--they know I'll meet my
deadlines and they know that flexibility is one of the reasons I stay there.
I can show up late or leave early. I insisted on finding a job where my
family COULD come first.

My daughter's school succeeded in making going to school "the reward"... so
that they don't HAVE to punish people outrageously for missing. Most people
just don't want to miss!

Jenrose

H Schinske wrote:
Sue ) wrote:

Well imo, you are essentially telling your daughter that rules don't
matter, school doesn't matter and that she can stay home at any
whim. What is she going to do in the real adult world when she has a
job? Stay home because she feels like it.

And what are you telling your child when you say that school is
important to stay in even when you are not learning anything? I think
that is a message that is being put across to way too many bright
kids, and one reason why so many people don't have the guts to leave
dead-end jobs or work to make their lives more interesting.

--Helen

I don't think the part time homeschooling thing would work so great. I do
think kids can miss school here and there, for family days, a museum trip,
etc. and not suffer any negative consequences. I even got some completely
freebee days where once a year or so I was allowed to stay home just because
I couldn't possibly deal with school that day! Didn't hurt me a bit. I was
top of my class, never take a sick day at work, wildly successful at life
;-), lol. I guess I think an occasional miss helps kids learn balance as
well. Sometimes things *are* more important then school or your job. Also,
with a job, we get vacation days so we can miss for whatever reason we want
to.

--
Nikki
Mama to Hunter (4) and Luke (2)