Potty Training HELP

I have a 3 year old daughter who is just not interested in potty training.
I ask her if she needs to go she says no, I put her on her potty she won't
go. I've even done the timer method I have her go every hour, and she'll
go inbetween that hour,so i do it every 30 minutes and she won't do it on
the potty, but as soon as I put a pull up or panties on she'll go in them.
She never has once expressed she needs to go. I ask and she says no, I
always have to ask her? Please help, I am so worried she is already 3,
shouldn't she be ready and wanting to go. She has a 7 year old sister who
was trained by 3 even through the night, what can I do to help this?

Desperate mom

In article
outparenting.com,
"Klynn" wrote:

I have a 3 year old daughter who is just not interested in potty training.
I ask her if she needs to go she says no, I put her on her potty she won't
go. I've even done the timer method I have her go every hour, and she'll
go inbetween that hour,so i do it every 30 minutes and she won't do it on
the potty, but as soon as I put a pull up or panties on she'll go in them.
She never has once expressed she needs to go. I ask and she says no, I
always have to ask her? Please help, I am so worried she is already 3,
shouldn't she be ready and wanting to go. She has a 7 year old sister who
was trained by 3 even through the night, what can I do to help this?

Desperate mom


Quit trying.

Leave her in diapers, and don't make a big deal of it.

Three year olds have learned that they can control certain things, and
they WILL control those things. Until SHE decides she wants to use a
toilet, she will continue to need a diaper.

So let her pick out some pretty underpants, put them in the drawer, tell
her that as soon as she wants to start using the toilet instead of
wearing diapers she can wear them -- and then don't bring it up again.

I guarantee that, at some point, she'll decide she wants to use the
toilet. And the "training" period will be negligible -- you won't have
to do hardly anything at all, because she'll have control. (At first,
you may want to remind her, for example, to use the toilet just before
you leave the house -- but with my kids who I did NOT force toilet
training onto, that's all that was ever necessary. With the ones that I
insisted on toilet training, I had to do MUCH more reminding!)

Right now, you've tried a lot of things and turned this into a Big Deal
-- the only way to go now is to deemphasise it as much as possible. No
books about toilets, no conversations, perhaps just an occassional
reference to "when you get older and stop using diapers" -- but leave it
entirely up to her (which, in the long run, it is anyway.)

(And do keep in mind that night dryness is NOT under conscious control
-- she may be dry through the night before she's ready to give up
diapers during the day, or she may not be dry through the night for
years after she's stopped using diapers during the day.)
--
Children won't care how much you know until they know how much you care

Klynn wrote:

I have a 3 year old daughter who is just not interested in potty training.
I ask her if she needs to go she says no, I put her on her potty she won't
go. I've even done the timer method I have her go every hour, and she'll
go inbetween that hour,so i do it every 30 minutes and she won't do it on
the potty, but as soon as I put a pull up or panties on she'll go in them.
She never has once expressed she needs to go. I ask and she says no, I
always have to ask her? Please help, I am so worried she is already 3,
shouldn't she be ready and wanting to go. She has a 7 year old sister who
was trained by 3 even through the night, what can I do to help this?

Desperate mom
----------------
"Toilet Training" is actually a misnomer.

Toilet use is NOT TRAINED, or learned, it simply happens when the
child's body matures in its control and she learns she CAN do it,
and then, imitating adults behavior is so totally attractive that
she just cannot resist trying it. You can't teach it, you can't
force it, and even TRYING to do so causes MUCH WORSE TROUBLE!

No kid ever went to school in diapers. Stop worrying.
Steve

Thanks for your help, but thats also the thing she will be starting school
in a couple of weeks and there will be other 3 year olds and 4, and they
asked if she is potty trained, I said no. They made it like I was a
horrible mother and just inconsistent with her learning, and said I need
to put her on a better schedule so she'll go, so in all actuality she will
be going to school in diapers.

Krystal

"Klynn" wrote in message
lkaboutparenting.com...
Thanks for your help, but thats also the thing she will be starting school
in a couple of weeks and there will be other 3 year olds and 4, and they
asked if she is potty trained, I said no. They made it like I was a
horrible mother and just inconsistent with her learning, and said I need
to put her on a better schedule so she'll go, so in all actuality she will
be going to school in diapers.

Krystal


Unless this school is the only choice, or is required, I personally wouldn't
send her and would find another place. Any school that cannot grasp that
children are different and progress at different times and in different ways
is not a place to which I would send my children.